Today, I was at my sister's wedding reception. My boyfriend of three years decided to give a toast to the happy couple. He was drunk and confessed his undying love to my sister. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend’s family dinner when her father suddenly raised a glass and said, “Let’s all raise a toast to the new couple!” I looked at my girlfriend, confused, only to realize he meant her brother and his now fiancé, who had just announced their engagement an hour earlier. I quickly but awkwardly raised my glass to avoid admitting my memory is dogshit. FML
Today, I took my new boyfriend to my step-sister's wedding. He knew more people there than I did, including 3 bridesmaids he used to sleep with. FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML
Today, at my birthday party in an expensive sushi restaurant that I spent hundreds of dollars to reserve, my boyfriend of 3 years proposed… to my sister. She said yes. They’ve been secretly seeing each other for the past year. She just graduated high school this past summer. FML
Today, after a few of my friends decided to drink last night, and my best friend ended up getting very drunk and confessing to my boyfriend that she loves him, her brother came over and gave me a lecture about responsibilities. I don't know what's worse, the lecture or the fact that her brother is my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to my (now ex) boyfriend’s step-uncle’s wedding. He got absolutely wasted and kept talking about marrying me in front of his mom and step-dad, but was listing off who he would and wouldn’t invite, all in front of the people he wouldn’t invite. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML
Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML
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Top comments
YoLauryn 0
can you say "awkwardddddd"
saIty 17
Did he mention that he got her a dick in a box?
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Comments (141)
YoLauryn 0
can you say "awkwardddddd"
UnderstoodCat 0
.... Because I love your dad. We are having a wedding. This July."
meggieh815 0
yes. I can say awkward with a bunch of extra letters. thanks for asking! :D
Femalepersuasion 0
^omgod get over the extra letters, even if your being sarcastic or funny, your annoying. Get the **** over yourself.
cyns0_oaSailor 0
awkwardddddd
meggieh815 0
I was joking, and I wasn't being mean. but okay. and get over myself? Good try. Shut the hell up. You don't know me bitch.
Jojo08_fml 0
#13 win
YacL 15
Starting an argument with a bunch of unnecessary swearing like thirteen year olds trying to sound awesome? Good job, guys.
meggieh815 0
That wasn't even me. it was my cousin. Sorry. :/
MrSassypants 34
I don't know. I don't know how to pronounce "...ddddddd." Not making fun of your grammar or anything but just don't know how.
jess6blondie9 3
No need to blame it on your cousin. Your comment wasn't even bad, I don't understand why people were freaking out about it.
meggieh815 0
I know. But it was my cousin. Haha :) Thanks though! :)
jess6blondie9 3
Okay. You're welcome.
ariannaa_fml 17
awkwardddddd
natas_fml 13
25 - is your name "Mrs Assy Pants" or "Mr sassy pants"? I hope it's the former.
MrSassypants 34
Mr.SassyPants. I used to put Mr in my pic but people started saying how I coildnt fit the s so I changed the pic and left it a mystery until people ask. I couldn't put a period but I should have capitalized the s after Mr.
slantyshanty 7
I am in love with my ex who is the sister of my last girlfriend, It really sucks.
jess6blondie9 3
Hmm. Well this FML sure makes me thankful that I don't have a sister.
elephants17 7
WHAT!!!
sillylolo 6
o sorry
ripgeorgecarlin 2
A vid of this would KILL on YouTube!
SadinSherman 16
awkward
Neorecon19 18
OPs sister look like her when OPs bf is drunk?
agummere796 0
is there a 3some in your future??
meggieh815 0
I've only seen two of your comment on FML and you already annoy me.
MrSassypants 34
Yeah because you can always have a threesome with you sister who is getting married, and your boyfriend because that's normal.
agummere796 0
don't hate, appreciate
RaeRaeHeartBreak 3
39- just get off FML! no one wants to read your stupid comments.
YacL 15
50- Then ignore them. No one is making you read his comments.
agummere796 0
50- someone afraid to show their ugly ass face?
Emster689 0
2, would you like to answer that question?
Beatlemaniac1964 9
oh gosh :(
jess6blondie9 3
Nice. Time to dump him and move on.
kendallhi 9
you totally deserve better…
slantyshanty 7
went out with this girl, then I dumped her because I had to move. I moved back and asked to go out with her. She said no, because she had a boyfriend and a few months later I was going out with her sister even though I still love her. I had to dump the sister though, because she went sort of psycho.
jess6blondie9 3
Okay, why would you even date her if you were in love with her sister? I don't understand that.
kendallhi 9
neither do I
jess6blondie9 3
Glad that I'm not the only one.
Flutist 3
She was psycho? Sounds like irrational behavior to me. You did an asshole thing. You dated a girl (this is my theory, correct me if I am wrong) who you could not completely love because you had feelings for her sister. Then you called her psycho when that sounds stalkerish to me. I can't have you Susy so I will date your sister.
jess6blondie9 3
I agree completely 94.
mustafa_fml 0
wow just wow
saIty 17
Did he mention that he got her a dick in a box?
womanjesus 0
well played.
MrSassypants 34
Can someone tell me the instructions for a dick in a box? Cut a hole in the box. Stick your junk in the box.
salvorican 24
42 What planet do u live on?...
MrSassypants 34
47 if he does live on another planet then he sure has some damn good connection. 42 if you didn't get the reference look it up on YouTube an if you did don't try to be stupid please.
lexielynn0680 0
have your girl open the box and thats how you do it! :D
allisonsapphireh 0
its from Saturday Night Live. Justin Timberlake and the Lonely Island.
CareeBearr 2
lol
erae_fml 0
bahahaha!
FlyPhoenix 0
Aw how embressing! :(
jess6blondie9 3
How embarrassing that you can't even spell embarrassing.
amadais 1
irony...
jess6blondie9 3
Yeah, kickass already said irony. Thanks for repeating what's already been said though.(:
joshuaUNWRITTEN 0
CHEERS!!!
EmilyFelton98 0
I don't know if thats something I'd toast to..
Suzumebachi 5
you have a kick ass profile pic!!! soul eater, woohoo!!!
txgirl2013 14
Tell everyone how bad he is in bed...even if he is good.. Sorry OP.. dump his ass
kendallhi 9
done that before
too_tiny 5
what is that animal?
parxxx 0
um you want to brag about ur bf as much as possible not make OPs 4 ppl to make fun of him