Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML
Today, my cuckold fantasy became real. I got back home earlier than usual and found my wife being banged by a guy. I waited 10 minutes for him finish before entering the room screaming. FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Today, my wife woke me up, saying her husband was home and that I needed to escape before he caught me. I was still struggling with the window when I remembered I’m her husband and she was laughing, filming my half-asleep ass trying to escape from being caught by myself cheating with my own wife. Duh. FML
Today, I came home early from work. My boyfriend and I live together. I open the door and I found my best friend watching TV on the couch, wearing lingerie. The room smelled like sex. She acted irrational and defensive, and had the audacity to ask what I was doing here. Bitch, I live here. FML
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
Today, my wife and I were having amazing make up sex after several months of painful separation. Halfway through, she screamed for me to stop, climbed off the bed, and ran into the bathroom. She spent an hour screaming and crying, then came out and emotionlessly told me to leave. FML
Today, some woman ran up, hugged me from behind, and called me another dude's name. When she saw my face, she apologised for getting the wrong person, and ran off. Perfectly innocent, right? Nope. My wife is forcing me to sleep in another room until I admit I’m having an affair. FML
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Top comments
alexup24 13
I'd start filing a divorce...
thebaddayblues 3
I hate when that happens..
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Comments (340)
pfclunchbox005 1
I know that is extremely hard to take in. But what you need to do is show no emotions to her. Don't say a damn word to her. Get your things. Leave and file for divorce. But be smart leave your iPhone in your pocket with the recorder on so that you have evidence in court. U can get a better girl then her.
bethcox 4
Hope you're ok :/
brandoneyez1 25
It might be her house, but she cheated so you can divorce and get the house by court order. What a hoe!!
withasmile 3
A house owned by one spouse prior to marriage presents unique issues, because often both spouses contribute to the home's maintenance and mortgage payments during their marriage. In some states, this commingling of marital and non-marital assets converts the home to marital property. Perhaps the fairer resolution, however, applied in other states, is that the amount of equity in the home at the time of marriage remains the original owner-spouse's property, but the increase in equity value during the marriage is marital property that belongs to both spouses. The same principles apply in cases involving increases in the value of a family business owned by one spouse before marriage. http://www.treasurecoastlawfirm.com/CM/FalmilyLawFAQ/FL-FAQ-What-happens-to-the-property-that.asp
mrxgen 3
Firstly, grow some balls. You should have yelled at her WTF is wrong with you. And then said we're through. And second, get a lawyer and take half the house. If she's Jessica Alba hot though then it's all moot. Think about the Vickie Mendoza line on the crazy to hot scale and act accordingly.
booze925 2
Scream back! XD
OffToTheGayBar 9
Bad, oh bad, this FML may be, killing 'er won't make you happy. Accost the man, then come up with a plan to steal 'er life and 'er house. Give 'er a fist to 'er cheating mouth. :D
POLITEALLCAPSGUY 1
THAT HAPPENED TO ME ONCE. I APOLOGIZED FOR WALKING IN AND THEN STAYED WITH MY PARENTS FOR A WEEK.
geod69 8
Go back & tell them to get the hell out of your house now
5t3ff1k4h 45
"It's her house..."
Platinum_Pie 4
"how to hate a bitch"