Today, I asked a very cute fireman for his number, "just in case I needed him to come to my rescue." He told me, "Yeah, sure!" and scribbled it down. After he walked away, I read his note, which read: "911". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML
Today, a cute guy came up to me and asked for my phone number. I was super excited and began to write it down when he said, "It doesn't have to be your real number, I'm not gonna call anyway." I still gave him my real number. FML
Today, while in class, a cute boy came up and asked me for my number. I giggled and wrote my phone number on a piece of paper and told him to call me sometime. He gave me a weird look and walked away. He was asking which number math problem I needed help with. FML
Today, while I was leaving a restaurant, the very handsome waiter, whom I had been trying to hit on all night, said to me, in front of everyone, "Why did you write your phone number on the table with hearts around it? You know I won't call you." FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML
Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML
Today, the really cute guy who asked for my number last night texted me. He wanted to know if he could get my friend's number, because he'd been too shy to ask her directly. FML
Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML
Today, I met a great guy at the bar, and we went back to my place. He left before I woke up, leaving a badly-scrawled note saying, "Gone to work, call me!" I couldn't make out the number. FML
Today, my life is so messed up that when I got pulled over, the officer asked about my life and not only did I not receive a ticket, he made me write down his personal number, patrol number and to call if I ever needed a favor or to talk, telling me that I had a friend in him. FML
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Top comments
holynemesis1208 3
great sense of humor.
PureGold 0
HAHA...funny guy xP And #2, maybe he wasn't fighting a fire at the time haha...what's wrong with liking a fireman? A young, muscular guy who also happens to save lives...yeah, she MUST be desperate.
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Comments (97)
kissmyass_fml 0
try to be hot next time :P
blah_blah_shity 0
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
ciaobella_fml 0
Sounds like a jerk..
gnoo_fml 0
genius, that fireman!
Fire_Lt 0
Never heard that one before, but hopefully I get to use it! Usually we like being picked up, but yes a lot of us can be assholes
itybitykity 0
Hahaha, epic.
rational_man 0
you are not hot enough, FF's get tons of trim just because of the job.
redonkulon 2
This makes me want to be a fireman or a policeman.
8313girl 28
Choose fireman. Only fireman!
sillypun 0
thats a classical finish. I love when girls get zinged because they think their grease hole is god's gift to man. it would have been god's gift if he hadn't attached it to so many dumb broads. God and this fireman both have a sense of humor
8313girl 28
I have a grease hole? :-(
TheBigDawg 8
#66, you were a chrononaut?