Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs. I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex. Afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd also had great sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had great sex and afterward decided to take a shower together. He left the room to get some towels, so I went to the bathroom and wait. I walked out of his room wearing nothing but a thong and ran into his mom who had come home from work early. FML
Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML
Today, I met my upstairs neighbours in person. They had been having vigorous sex and all of a sudden I heard a loud, “OH SHIT” and they both fell through the ceiling and ended up on top of me on my sofa, covered in plaster and dust, and stark naked. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were sexting, and he asked me if I would be naked and waiting for him when he got home. When he told me he was on his way, I took my clothes off and got into bed. What he didn’t tell me was he was bringing friends to pick up a desk from our place for their office. FML
Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML
Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML
Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML
Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
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Top comments
kawa_fml 0
He's a bastard...I wonder what on earth your friend was thinking while she was sitting in the closet listening to you. Sounds like a dirty romance novel plot. You're better off without them both, it would seem.
skittleface 0
i like the way this was written. that sucks so intensely.
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Comments (136)
n8equalsd 0
damn. this guy must be a legend.
pun619 0
haha. fyl
apfunction 0
anyone notice how only girls do their friend's boyfriends? (instead of a guy doing his friend's girlfriend)
Seems2BBadLuck 0
#119 but he still got with her best friend. 2 way street!
jennniferlea 4
eewwww herpes n aides n gonarea OH MY!
Mattskii 0
Lol mad props to OPs bf.
that_guy_ollie 0
maybe she just got kidnapped by the dwarves in narnia and turned into their dirty sex slave and he was actually being cute waiting for you nd she just happend to escape from the fluffy chains that had bound her jeez guys :P
rozmajzl 0
sucks 4 u
music12 4
Why would they be having sex at your house? They're stupid!!!
kims0706 10
Slap your friend and make her walk home naked, dump the bastard and tell him that you hope he learns how to please a women while practice on your friend :)