Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML
Today, my dog surprised everyone by somehow managing to climb on the roof. I followed him up and spent the next hour trying to catch him. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and I noticed the balcony door was open. As I went to go close it, I swear I saw my cat wondering outside and I panicked. Long story short, I locked myself out searching for the cat and the next thing I knew, he was meowing at me from the balcony a few feet above me. FML
Today, my cat jumped out a fourth-story window when I went to pet her. FML
Today, my boyfriend was on the roof of his house. I climbed the ladder but I'm kind of scared of heights, so when I got up there I just sat on the edge. The gutter broke, fell down, and I fell along with it. My boyfriend then said, "I've been trying to tell you to go on a diet". FML
Today, I spent a half hour trying to help my cat down after he got stuck in the tree on my lawn. I finally gave up and called a local tree care company to help. When I returned outside, I found my cat casually walking about by the door. The guy who showed up to help was not happy. FML
Today, I went searching for my cat who'd escaped. Of course, I searched the entire building and somehow she'd got back in through my front door of my apartment. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs of my apartment building because I thought my cat was a ghost. FML
Today, my cat jumped on my shoulders, but stepped in my hood and choked me and when I panicked she dug her claws into my shoulders. FML
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and asked if I'd seen her cat. I helped her search the hallway, basement, and garden for 30 minutes. We finally found it sitting inside my apartment, where I had apparently been living with it for three days without noticing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jackassiddy 8
To get in the mind of a pussy you must BECOME one.
strawberrywine22 30
At least you tried despite your fear, that's sweet!! Good job. Also your name up there made me LOL.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (80)
Enslaved 38
I'm sure your girlfriend still thanked you for your effort. You can't go wrong trying to play hero for her needs.
ImaginaryFoe 1
"You can't go wrong trying to play hero"? That's terrible advice. So many FMLs start with someone trying to impress another. OP, what's your next act of bravery - heroically rescuing a bird from a tree? Saving a rabbit that's stuck in a hole? I'm not sure why anyone felt the cat needed to be rescued but next time, use a little more intelligence and a lot less show-off.
Enslaved 38
IF, I meant it in this scenario. Nothing wrong with trying to face your fears and overcome them. (As long as there's no real danger.) If I were his girlfriend, I would think it was a sweet gesture. I do agree, the cat didn't need recusing.(:
perdix 31
Climbing on the roof can be very dangerous. Lots of people get killed or seriously injured from falls off roofs, even from single-story buildings.
Enslaved 38
I agree whole heartily, #35 :P But if caution is used, it can also be therapeutic. ***Recently, I went into a pet store that allowed dogs in there. It helped overcome my fear of them. Baby steps.(:
ikickgingers 15
*slow clap*
Enslaved 38
Hello Kicky! o.O I shall join in with your slow clap, to the beat of Smashing Pumpkins songs.(:
Llama_Face89 34
Woah haven't seen you for a while O.o
DocBastard 40
All this FML is missing is the phrase "to try to impress her..." Instant YDI.
perdix 31
It's in there -- he used the phrase "I thought I would try to look good" instead, but the self-serving intention is still there. So, being pussy-whipped, he tried to find her pussy, but revealed himself to be the real pussy in this drama.
DocBastard 40
Perdix - I meant the literal phrase, not the inference.
perdix 31
I don't know what possesses people to write down their selfish motivations for what appear to be altruistic actions. How stupid are they?
DocBastard 40
Can I assume that's a rhetorical question?
perdix 31
Yes, you may. I wasn't expecting you to say that people who write "trying to impress" or a variant have an IQ of 78.4 +/- 2.5 points.
DeVaughnS 5
All that for some pussy
isaiaah 6
*facepalm*
CamcAmIaM 10
That's pretty pathetic.
PipXanadu 4
Is it just me or is there something missing in "The cat climbed down when got up there"
KiiwiiRox 6
Trying to impress someone mostly leads to looking like an idiot. That pussy probably planned it, to see if you're worthy of gfs pussy. Them pussys have to watch out for each other ya' know ;)
s0ulslack 20
hahahaha
bubo_fml 11
Does her Mom have a big Dick?