Today, while on the tramway with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the subway and there was a guy yelling, "Regret your sins and devote yourself to God right now." Another man got up from his seat and told him, "I work 12 hours a day and all I want is to go home and rest, you shut the fuck up or I'll make you meet God personally." FML
Today, I told a friend I had become more religious lately. He immediately started mocking me for being a "stupid creationist bigot." When I told him how offensive that was, he acted bewildered and started condescendingly lecturing me about how "science has proven God does not exist." FML
Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML
Today, I was riding on my usual bus, when I noticed a man staring at me. I was having a really bad day, and said "Can you please stop staring at me?" He then replied with "I'm just trying to look out the window, and your head is in the way. Don't flatter yourself." FML
Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML
Today, while on the bus, I started a conversation with the person next to me. After a little back and forth, she finally said, "Do you think people will stop talking to me if I say I have AIDS?" FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
Today, despite the carriage being entirely empty, a large man chose to sit right beside me on the train. After making me uncomfortable with personal questions, he asked if we could be friends and hang out, both of which I shyly declined. He then accused me of being a racist. FML
Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML
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Top comments
Recon13x 9
Someone thinks highly of themselves.
Tripartita 45
What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us. Just a stranger on the… tram. It doesn't quite have the same ring to it.
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Comments (69)
Nyattack 14
I don't get all these serious/bashful comments, to me this guy sounds like a legend. People discussing extremely serious or controversial subjects on public transportation kinda set themselves up for intrusive remarks...
PickleOfLife 4
* most likely explanation: you just met someone with a great sense of humour; * next most likely: you just met someone who was trying to protect everyone else on the tram; * next most likely: you met someone who was grumpy and didn't want to hear your conversation; * least likely: you just met God. Why? Simple statistics really. Almost everyone has a sense of humour; there are fewer people, but still lots of them, who will stand up and protect themselves and others from having to hear a religious discussion; there are yet fewer - but sadly still too many - grumpy old men among us; and finally, there are only about 50 Gods out there - 100 tops.
Vlen_fml 20
you've been pretty lax in your mythology studies if you think there are only 100 or so god's out there, Shintoism alone kicks the crap out of that number.
tomvertigo 17
"I don't believe in you, so why dont you disappear?"
Redgy22 26
What if God was one of us? On a bus like one of us? Trying to find his way home?
jackler92 16
Plot twist: it was eminem
Miss_Whipped 43
He didn't say he was beginning to feel like a Rap God. :)
PulpFact 8
Apparently Kanye West lives in France
hi358 6
Pretty damn sure they were not being serious, I say lots of my jokes in a serious tone, it makes them more funny.
vikky538 29
So you are the almighty?
anonynous97 13
Good old cosmic humanists. Always there to give you a chuckle.
KingDomino 9
Must have been a damning experience. ...I need to find better puns...