Today, my friends and I went camping in the woods. I fell asleep first. Waking up hours later to them bunched up together in the middle of the tent and me half-way outside, I confronted them about it. They admitted, "We heard a bear so we needed a sacrifice." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friends and I went camping. In the middle of the night, they carried me deep into the forest and left me there. I stepped on a beehive as I walked back to the tent. FML
Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and another couple. We saw a black bear. I shrieked and peed, while the other guy stepped forward and yelled, "Get outta here!" To my surprise, it ran away. My girlfriend is so ashamed of me that she's refusing to share a tent. I'm sleeping in my truck bed. FML
Today, I went camping with friends, two guys and one girl. Night came and things got freaky. Two of them began to make out. I wanted to make a move on my guy friend but he said, “Nah, let’s not ruin the friendship.” Then he proceeded to have a threesome with them. Oh, and the other guy didn’t want me either. FML
Today, I went on a relaxing nature hike to de-stress. I got lost for hours, encountered a bear, and had to play dead, only for the bear to steal my sandwich then sit there for hours before finally leaving. FML
Today, was the third day of my camping trip with my "friends". I woke up in my boxers with my hand glued to my forehead. FML
Today, I was on a camping trip, just about to pitch my tent, when the fire brigade showed up. No, I did not set anything ablaze. This nice, quiet little meadow I picked to spend the night? It’s their habitual training ground. FML
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML
Today, I went on a hike with friends, but as I'm the worst outdoorsperson because I rarely venture outside of the city, I ended up getting lost in some woods after straying from our group. I ended up having to call 911 to be rescued. My friends will absolutely not let me live this ordeal down. FML
Today, my friends told me all five of us should bring sleeping bags on our field trip; I brought mine only to find out they had told me that so they would get the four beds to themselves. They all 'forgot' to bring them and its only fair that I should sleep on the floor. We are here for a week. FML
Today, I tagged along with some friends to a party in the woods. Halfway into the night, a party-goer's boyfriend got extremely drunk and violent, causing the others to panic and drive away in the two cars we pooled in. My best friend and I had to run all the way back home on foot. FML
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Top comments
Trym 7
Never fall asleep first. Ever.
isallwaysme 27
they're right. they dont have to outrun the bear, they just have to outrun you
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Comments (77)
tomhofer 14
That's not beary nice Zing
froggyjade 16
That was un-bear-able ;-)
TheTacoMan 24
That was Bear-ly funny
bighood24 17
bear with me for a moment, but these puns are getting out of hand
steffidallasbfl 16
Never be the first to fall asleep op... Never.
dawood_k 27
Well what you don't know won't hurt you. You were sleeping it off
masterof1 7
AH OH AH OH A A A A AH OH AH OH A A A A sacrifice
sehrgutmann 19
yeahhhh I wouldn't go camping with them again...
JMichael 26
Don't your friends know that bears normally don't attack unless provoked?
RedPillSucks 33
Or unless they're hungry
cchuckcloninger 5
Wrong. Most attacks involve food.
suri23 11
New friends-get them,
sdroze1389 31
logic dictates that the bear would have ignored you over them. feel comfort in their stupidity. they moved you further away from food and light, you seem more feral that way.
perdix 31
Hey, at least they didn't put your hand in warm water.
emirie 21
I don't know about you, but I'd rather pee my pants than get eaten by a bear.
blackonblight 33
You think the bear would eat a person when there's probably a bunch of junk food not ten feet away? Bear's gonna murder the twinkies.
Kindeyu1005 14
I agree with emirie
Jackel0228 12
That's the best of friends!