Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML
Today, I was on a bus with a whole bunch of athletes at a ski competition. I had to go to the bathroom, so I walked to the back and I let the floodgates open up. When I came out, everyone who was at the back of the bus near the bathroom had moved to the front because the smell was so putrid. Everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone fell silent as my dad began to pray for our meal. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML
Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML
Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at Tae kwon do practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear." He did this in front of all my classmates. FML
Today, while my nephews got ready for school, my boyfriend walked into the bathroom to ask me if he could accompany us to the bus stop. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hold my diarrhea anymore. As he was asking, I began to loudly relieve myself. He looked at me in shock and just said, “Oh okay, I’ll fuck off now.” FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Usually, this would be the opening of porno flick, but the sounds and smells of your explosive diarrhea managed to make a group of teenage boys go limp.
Xythenol 6
Damn. Must've been one epic shit to deserve a slow clap.
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Comments (100)
grandpaearthling 2
shit shitty shit shitty shit shit sharoo I'm in the boys room just going poo shit shitty shit shitty shit shit sharee oh how I wish I just had to pee
grandpaearthling 2
shitty shitty bang bang we love you too
TheBananaTheif 0
That was such a fail, the only reason I'm commenting is to enlighten you on how you should stop trying.
Jimboom 12
They probably had mad respect for that wicked slam dunk you just pulled on that toilet.
pepelapew 0
diarrhea cha cha cha
zenti 2
It would have been hilarious if someone had given you a dozen roses and placed a tiara on your head. Go ahead, wave to the crowd!
caits13 0
or a tp sash.
robc32ca 4
how was using the boys bathroom faster than using the girls? in all the schools I've been in they are within 20 feet. I think you wanted to use the boys room instead!
bigredmonkeybutt 30
wow. now you've gone & ruined the bball team's belief that girls don't poop. happy?
tygerarmy 35
If it was that epic of a shit be happy you used the boys bathroom. They gave you a slow clap, girls would've just made fun of you. And in my high school the bathrooms were in locker rooms on opposite sides of the gym. And outside they alternated floors.
ulicksam 0
And you'd be the first to scream at a guy that did the same thing. YDI and worse.
EvilDave 13
YDI and you should have gotten the same punishment a boy would have received for going into the girls bathroom
yeppers6502 0
Are you a girl? Otherwise I would hope you'd be in the boys bathroom.