Today, my mom came home and told me she was going back to college. She's going to the community college that a lot of the graduates from my school go to. She has biology with my ex. They're lab partners and have to do take home labs together. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mom picked my ex-boyfriend up early from school to take him to see a special screening of a documentary that's showing in town. She left me after school for an hour and a half because they ended up going out for coffee afterwards. FML
Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML
Today, I graduated from college with two undergrad degrees in biochem and wildlife biology, with high distinction. My mom told me she had found me a job at a petting zoo. I thought she was joking. She then said sternly, "I want grandkids. At least you will meet girls there." FML
Today, I dropped out of college and moved back home to help my mom take care of my younger siblings after our father's death. My mom yelled at me and scolded me and lectured me for throwing my life away, and said this was the last thing she ever wanted me to do. I thought she needed help. FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend, who is obviously still in love with me, is best friends with my mom. Now every time I come home, she is over. She even spent 4 hours helping us decorate our Christmas tree, and now she is telling my little sister about our love life. FML
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Today, in order to avoid seeing my ex-girlfriend in class, I changed my schedule for "personal reasons." Apparently she had the same idea and changed her schedule as well. We now have all the same classes together. Before, we had just two. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML
Today, my mum came to visit me in the country where I'm studying. We went out, and when she saw a dude eating something she liked the look of, she made me run after him to ask where he bought it. The guy was my ex. FML
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Top comments
mad_molly 0
Be happy for your mum she's furthering her education! So what about your ex, it was probably just a minor high school romance. Go to your room when he has to come over.
jchansfan 0
You. Are. Disgusting.
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Comments (47)
hoschiadedodi 0
THIS IS F MY LIFE NOT PITY ME!!!!!!!!!!! So YDI for using up the space on this site.
Feverrotes 15
Here's the first Take Home Lab Assignment: Title: Mother Daughter Ex Threesome Experiment Materials: Mother, Daughter, Daughter's Ex-Boyfriend, Bed, Condoms, Sex Toys (Optional) Hypothesis: The Ex-Boyfriend will end up in Cloud Nine. Procedures: 1. Daughter f***s ex-boyfriend on her mother's bed. 2. Mother f***s ex-boyfriend on her daughter's bed as her daughter watches. 3. Simultaneous f***ing. 4. Record procedures 1-3 on a video camera and hand it in as your report. Your Life Is ******. His Life Is Awesome.
jchansfan 0
You. Are. Disgusting.
DeathByFalchion 0
Suck it up and congratulate your mom on continuing her education.
CallMeHush 1
Suck it up, you mom is going back to school and latched on to a familiar face. If you were in school you wouldn't even be around to see this or you would probably be too busy to care.
perdix 31
"Take home labs?" You're so screwed when they get to the male reproductive system. I'll bet your mom is going to have to apologize to your ex for creating such a small set of meat and 2 veg, and not just raising you as a girl.
DynamicDave 11
I smell a threesome!
Stumblebum30 5
the problem is? so tell me... is the world all about YOU and we just live in it?
LemmingsKillMe 0
poor you, my mom has cooking classes with my ex but deal with it.
BaBiiSpAnKy821 0
omg thats so funny! my friend jake is going out with his xgf's mom and theyre engaged!!! ur not alone (:
KuchkaNumberOne 2
That is... Awkward.
blastvortex 4
ㄟ㋛ㄏ