Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
All sexed up
Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Galo
🌶️ Spicy
He enjoyed himself way too much
Today, I had to clean cum from one of the seats of the movie theater where I work at as a cleaner. FML
Anonymous
Not what you think
Today, I was running late to work so I started getting dressed and brushing my teeth. I got to work 5 minutes late, which is when noticed a toothpaste stain on my shirt. I thought it looked identical to a cum stain, and the worst part was I was wearing black, so it was noticeable. FML
Anonymous
Vancouver, United States
Today, my boss held my hair while I threw up. It's day two on the job. FML
Anonymous
Chicago, United States
Dribble drizzle
Today, I took a quick nap in my car during my lunch break. When I woke up, I had drooled all over myself and had a large wet stain on my shirt. I tried to pretend it was a "sweat stain" but ended up walking into a meeting looking like I'd been caught in a downpour of my own making. FML
Anonymous
Great look
Today, I had a conversation with my work crush. I walked back to my office, only to realize I had breakfast in my hair. I had oatmeal for breakfast, and it looked like puke. FML
SnotScrubber
Tulsa, United States
Disgusting
Today, I was idly scratching gunk off the common computer while waiting for a meeting to start. It wasn't until the end that I realized it was dried snot. FML
g_unit
Canada
Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML
ewwgross
United States
Bad hair day
Today, at my hairdressing job, my first client of the day came in for a cut. Her hair smelled awful, and when I asked her why, she informed me that she'd gotten trashed with some friends the night before, and one of them had puked in her hair. She came to me to get it cleaned out. FML
notmine
New Delhi, India
Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML
RetailJocky
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Tarred
Today, at work, a bag of driveway repair tar split and spilled on my arms and hands. Not only does it stain and pull out any arm hair it touches, the stains also look like I was playing in dog poop. FML
Top comments
smokeymcpottt 3
He tried to get your hair pregnant.
UnicornsDoExist 0
There's this thing called a shower. It's new and everything, but t does work.
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Comments (259)
musicboy997 0
next
changesinme 0
I was sleeping at work for two hours...when I woke up
_TONGAN_ 5
wow OP you have a whole bunch of nerds working in the cubicles around you and the stood over the wall and shot cum at your hair and then all of a sudden they ran out of juice so they had to stop and you found out about the cum 2 hours after it all dried up...just my theory!.....
Daerauko 0
lol "last night I refused to swallow..."
seanders 10
At least it's not so visible there, now if it was in a black shirt then fml for sure
UnicornsDoExist 0
There's this thing called a shower. It's new and everything, but t does work.
afdude87 6
the girl above me makes a good point
hiddydiddy 0
i hope this is a typo meant to say 'gum'. haha ;)
cassiesaurus 0
haha. that is hilarious. but well try showering before work next time.
KingDingALing 9
Maybe if you stop having sex with blind guys OP, then they would aim right!
angels21 0
lmao @ 45 & 66 !!
skittle68 0
Maybe OP has long hair and doesn't wash it every day, and maybe the guy was already cumming and couldn't quite make it to her mouth
MissErikaHart 0
tell 'em how it is..^
MrSassypants 34
1 what do you mean by next 66 haha you kinda stole my comment. I wanted to say I hope you mean your hair is num (numb) which doesn't make much sinc but I never don't not make much sense. ;)
Farion 7
LOLOLOLOL... but no thats nasty lmao
sloppyflow 1
ur dad told u to quit ur job at the district.
hippiechick96 3
op, where exactly do you work?
Celesta 11
If you work as a stripper this shouldn't be awkward for you.
wwerulez14 6
"That's the last time I give my bf head before work..." This should be an FML for her bf, not her.
hiddydiddy 0
loooool haha
mona_is_here 10
Now make sure there's no Rohypnol in your cup of coffee.
BoyFromTheFuture 0
Is that... is that hair gel?
xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx 0
nice try
demarcusT 0
Stop using axe shampoo ;D
Elixa 0
mmmmm I love licking my bfs dads cum out of my hair ;)
Dre24 0
****** up
lgs25 0
182 so you eat both ur bf and his dads cum
chloec16 0
that's some ****** up shit right there
Elixa 0
191 yeah, of course, I like anal, double penetration, so I get my bf and his dad to tag team me. Mr. Williams cum taste sweet yet, my bfs... salty.
Elixa 0
I do whatever daddy tells me.
hippiechick96 3
elixa, all your comments were moderated so I have no idea what you said but I'm assuming it's bad. lol
TheOptimist 0
You should have charged that man extra.
zerobahamut03 2
YDI for not showering or cleaning your face after doing the nasty or semi nasty... Gross.
Elixa 0
I like flowers and rainbows
Elixa 0
I like flowers and rainbows
Elixa 0
and my bfs dads Wang juice in my hair
Timmy_Boy 17
haha so true
purpleamandapand 6
hahahahahahaha fail
MaJiN_fml 2
agreed
Kyto7884 0
ewwww take a shower in the morning OP!
MissLizWolf 8
I agree! if you had a shower before you went to work, you wouldn't have to experience the embarrassment to having cum in your hair for the day, haa!
IJam2DMB 0
you are sexy. the kind of sexy that you lock in your basement. I would lick every inch of your sexy body!!
illegalnative 0
i think the guy failed in this one, how does he miss and get the hair
biwinning88 1
wait the same thing happened to me but I didn't have time to shower before school, beauty school where I was going to be doing other peoples hair all say
dri_dri_fml 18
Maybe it's toothpaste?
WavinFlag 3
wtf? maybe ur boss came on u and u didnt know?
CommieKel 0
or there's people lurkin in the air vents...
boopityboppity 11
Maybe they're climbin' in your windows.
JManHobbs 0
Well played 142
BoyFromTheFuture 0
they rapin' everybody up in hair
brandonbkl 0
hideeeee yooo kidss...
boopityboppity 11
I considered not posting my comment just because I knew there'd be people like you three. Those who get it will get it without your help. Your comments are a literal waste of space.
LexSwift 17
Don't have to be a bitch about it. Maybe you shouldn't've posted it if it bothers you so much.
BoyFromTheFuture 0
you are a literal asshole. since it's the mime of the moment people like to play along not help. don't worry I'm sure you'll go down in history as the first guy who quoted bed intruder on FML (sarcasm). what a doucher...
BoyFromTheFuture 0
^ meme (damn you autocorrect)
rubarable2 0
hide yo wife and hide yo husband, they rapin errebody out there
YummYumTasty 0
hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husband.
smokeymcpottt 3
He tried to get your hair pregnant.
dreaGiallo 0
that's what happens when you fondle the follicles. I say you just shave your head and you won't have to worry about that ever happening again.
ygdrassil 17
Shave your head and you'll never have to worry about cum OR sex again.
mcshef17 6
wow u r soooo ******* hot. I like your muscles
clownman 0
^ as silly as it sounds this made my day! haha
hahahayeahright 5
Op, it's better than finding wet cum in your hair!
Allforthelawlz 0
5th!!!!
CreateZ 0
Fail.
Kevlar29 0
Do you by any chance work at a strip club?
pghv92 0
lmao
fivehuskies 6
You dirty bitch
Hgielad_720 0
Did anyone else notice?
suppressed08 2
That's where the big money is.
nightmares97 0
heyy I thought you were very pretty so I thought I would message you
boopityboppity 11
You thought, hmm? Sounds like a bit of a stretch.
nitrogirl 0
what did you do on your brake?(;
Daerauko 0
lol gee, let's think about it for a moment.
Jessi2487 0
i think what 9 means is break*
mcxhunni 0
pwned!
apet214 10
More like who did you do on your brake? ;-)
theclutz123 2
break*
oldwiseguy 0
I don't know how you know exactly what was in your hair when you seem to be clueless as to how it got there when you were at work, but I'm going to assume you are an expert in having cum in your hair. Must be a common experience in your life.
ohsuzykuew 0
they do understand. they are just trying to be funny. you probably didn't realize it because no one has succeeded at it yet.
ImaginaryFoe 1
I think you are giving them too much credit, ohsuzy. Some are attempting to be funny, others are genuinely dense.
mudboggin96 0
damn ur bf has a powerful shot lol, and apparently you have sub-par hygiene