Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML
Today, I woke up feeling ill. My mom sent me to school anyway, and grounded me for "lying" about being sick. As soon as I got to school, I began vomiting blood. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. When I came home, I told my mom. She just got angry with me, blamed me for it, and didn't even ask if I was OK. FML
Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML
Today, after spending a few minutes de-icing my car and leaving the heat on so it would warm up, I slipped as I was entering the car and hit my head on the door, causing it to close and lock. I'm waiting for my mom who has a spare key to come and unlock it. Class started ten minutes ago. FML
Today, I tried to sneak in at 2 a.m. after going out, since I'm 16, but I tripped over a pair of slippers and landed flat on my face. My body fell quietly, but I let out a very loud and guttural, "Oof." After about a minute, I lifted my face to see my mom standing over me. I'm now grounded for 3 days. FML
Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML
Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML
Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML
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Top comments
Capybara 0
If this is true, then you really could have endangered a lot of people. What if you had passed out and swerved into a neighbor's yard or something? Still, I agree. Your mom is a bitch.
JohnnyViola 0
What a bitch.
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Comments (101)
audiogasmic 0
your mom is a bitch. end of story.
xoFMLxo 0
well i would love to know the pranks that you pull on her to make you think youre lying. but what the hell were you thinking driving yourself to the hospitol? its called 9-1-1. you couldve killed yourself and others. obviously you arent invincible. and if you would have gotten into an accident people could sue you and you family for everything they own and all their assests. im glad you are willing to bet your family's possesions on something that you could've easily called for an ambulance.
Ethan205 0
Wow what a bitch.
KendraTaylor 0
wow, my mom is exactly the same. if she finds out obama is the anti christ, im grounded?
mrcarmine 0
are you the boy who cried wolf?!?!
Lolrus 0
Ok no offense but why would u be driving AND on the cellphone while dizzy and bleeding? but ya, that really sucks what ur mom said.
mehwhateverr 0
i don't believe you deserve what happened, but why were you driving while bleeding and dizzy?
louyfi85 0
Well I'm going to say the same as everyone else here but definitely not smart driving in that state you were in.
LarryLobster 0
The OP doesn't say anywhere that he/she was talking on the phone while driving, so let's not assume that. @OP, i'm sure you could have asked anyone around to give you a ride to the hospital. An ambulance bill is really expensive, but so are the lives of others. But I forgive you because you probably had some impaired judgment. Now you know.
imnotlanderman 0
Do you normally goof around, telling her crazy shit that isn't true? Either way, hope you're doing ok.