Nearly FMLs

By numbat97 - 07/02/2016 04:19 - Australia - Perth

Today, I woke up to my period, a hangover and a sunburn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By :( - 07/02/2016 04:15 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I smelled something very unpleasant coming from the back of my fridge. Turns out the smell was from a decomposing rodent. I lost my pet rat weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Tracey - 07/02/2016 04:09 - Russian Federation

Today, I found out my son has a girlfriend so I asked about her, at which point he broke down crying and admitted he has a girlfriend, she is 8 months pregnant, he quit university and got a job he hates to support the baby and kept it a secret hoping I'd never find out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 04:09 - United States - Seattle

Today, I finally raised enough money to buy an Xbox one. I cheerfully left to go buy one, only to return home several hours later with a broken clutch and $200 less in towing fees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Leauge - 07/02/2016 04:05 - United States - Franklin

Today, I found my girlfriend crying. She was crying because our lizards haven't grown into dinosaurs. I'm concerned for more than one reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 04:04 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to take me out on a date as I came back from a long holiday yesterday. I'm now locked in his car while he's making a drug deal with someone who has to drive him to a "secret location." How romantic. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By angerytat - 07/02/2016 04:02 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, my mother called and complained I haven't been to visit in a while. Last time I visited I got yelled at for using a wheelchair even though it's the only way I can get around. fml

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By IamHM - 07/02/2016 03:58 - United States - Albuquerque

Today I was in a shop where my crush works. Trying to impress him, I decided to try to drink straight out of the slush machine. I slipped, knocked the machine over, and finally fell in a huge pool of cherry red slushie juice. I now owe $1000 & my crush hates me for the mess he had to clean up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By #mylife - 07/02/2016 03:51 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. After an hour of crying and then multiple hours of pretending like it didn't happen, he came over to my house. We made out and had sex. After, he got up to leave and proceeded to break up with me, again.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By hemovedonup - 07/02/2016 03:48 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend is properly famous. How? His fangirls found me on twitter and started harassing me about our love life. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By whathedamnhell - 07/02/2016 03:47 - United States - Murphys

Today, after having a head injury last week, my doctor told me I have some mild amnesia. He told me this after I missed all my classes, was late to all my shifts, and ended up back in the hospital after finding two tampons inside of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By nemosxdimples - 07/02/2016 03:33 - United States - Compton

Today, while going out to eat with my family the waiter escorted us to our table and handed us our menus. My little brother eagerly reached for the kids menu only to have it taken from his hands by the waiter as he explained that it was for me. The menu reads "for kids 10 and under" im 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Karianne - 07/02/2016 03:17 - United States - Bronx

Today, I confessed my love to my best friend... He ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By anonymous - 07/02/2016 03:10 - United States - Peterborough

Today, My mom accused me of doing heroin because I am always wearing a sweatshirt and she can never see my arms. FML!

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 02:59 - Canada - Torbay

Today, I got a $200 gift card to a steakhouse for my birthday, given to me by a good friend I've known for years. Due to health problems, I've recently become a vegan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By kadefoster__8 - 07/02/2016 02:57 - United States - Irving

Today, I found out that a 3 month relationship with this girl I really liked was an on going joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By TheMike23 - 07/02/2016 02:54 - United States - Winter Garden

Today, my dad cut the power to my room while trying to fix the plugs in the bathroom, and in doing so, prematurely shut off my desktop. He told me not to worry and "it won't happen again", so I turned it back on. He then cut it again, and now my nearly $900 desktop is busted and must be wiped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By unfortunate me - 07/02/2016 02:35

Today, I went to a dentist about the pain in my right molar. She told me it was a scrape on the gum from eating something hard, and would go away in a few days. "Oh, yeah," she continued, "you also need all four of your wisdom teeth out. I'm not sure who told you they'd fit." I'm 25 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 02:28 - United States - Hamilton

Today, I was in a class where the teacher doesn't teach at all. She stopped 30 minutes early and told us to study that entire time. After she took a phone away, she then took my eraser away. When I asked why, she said that I was too busy playing with it. It's just an eraser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 02:24

Today, a FitBit friend asked me how I managed to only do three minutes of cardio. I forgot I was wearing it earlier during my solo time. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By bloodied - 07/02/2016 02:16 - United States - Royal Oak

Today, I found the perfect wedding dress. It also happened to be the day that my tampon leaked and ruined the dress, which I then had to buy. It was 5000$. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 02:08 - Ireland

Today, I failed all of my tests. Except my pregnancy test. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By invisiblelady - 07/02/2016 02:03 - United Kingdom - Gosport

Today, to celebrate me finally feeling better after my recent chemotherapy, my fella decided to take me out for dinner, I had Mexican food for the first time, and so far I've spent 3 hours on the toilet with my head in a bucket!, FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By FirstClassAirplaneFood - 07/02/2016 02:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my son called 911 because he needed help with his math homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 233

By Anon - 07/02/2016 01:46 - United States - Chicago

Today, I ordered takeout from a local Chinese restaurant. They gave me five forks. The food was all for me. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By Dammit Mom - 07/02/2016 01:42 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I heard my mom moaning from the room above me. Hard to do homework while your parents are having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By somuchformotherlylove - 07/02/2016 01:35 - United States - Twin Falls

Today, I've realized that no apology from my mother ever means anything. She apologized the other day for not caring more about my feelings when I was growing up. Today, she refused to hear me out after a conflict we had, and yelled at me to shut up when I started crying. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By whatthehell - 07/02/2016 01:30 - United States - Waukegan

Today, I had a threesome with my husband and my friend. He didn't wrap it up and came in her. Now he isn't sure who he wants to be with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By dating an idiot - 07/02/2016 01:30 - United States - Dallas

Today, my still-drunk boyfriend woke up, pushed me out of the bed, and started cuddling my body pillow. When I tried to wake him up, he accused me of cheating on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 07/02/2016 01:30 - United States - Twin Falls

Today, for probably the thousandth time in my life, my mom got pissed off and made me feel like shit about myself. How? I made tacos and didn't think to offer her one, and instead of communicating with me, she chose to yell and call me selfish and refuse to accept that all she had to do was ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 588

You deserved it 2 342

Today, my first kiss was caught by my mom's doorbell camera which links to her phone. She uploaded the video to Facebook, along with a soppy comment about her baby girl becoming all grown up. Most of my school has seen and commented on it already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 170

Today, I was supposed to catch a ride with a friend and go to Warped Tour with her. She called at the last minute to say she was sick, so I told her we didn't have to go. I just got a text saying she just got pictures and autographs with the band I especially wanted to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 556

You deserved it 3 676

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 969

You deserved it 2 693

Today, I got a hand cramp from popping zits on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 086

You deserved it 25 371

Today, I was making out with a really hot guy in a Jacuzzi. He had the biggest booger hanging out of his nostril, but I was too embarrassed to say anything to him about it. He went in for a kiss. Soon after our lips parted, he said, "Oh, you have big booger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 916

You deserved it 36 353