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vegemute

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vegemute

3Fucked!

vegemute
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 March 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3837
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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vegemute's page activity

Visits<b>labracabrador</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 2:34am<b>aishah77</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 12:33pm<b>Heatmizer</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 8:40am<b>trevorboii</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 12:45am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 12:30am<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 6:16am<b>alexlots</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 10:54am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 10:39am<b>nunes36</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 3:08am<b>lola4455</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Araj_Hs</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 6:13am<b>Archangel77</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 6:58am<b>Majjzg</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:26am<b>BBlah</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:21am<b>bridgetb77</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:51pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 7:30am<b>AHSFan</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:43am<b>vegasked</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 4:17pm

Fucked!<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 6:30am<b>alexlots</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 4:55pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:52pm

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vegemute's favorite FMLs

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

#20142294
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35002) - you deserved it (2515)

On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33901) - you deserved it (3685)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9935) - you deserved it (35028)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, while at work being a waitress, I gave my customer his credit card receipt to sign. Instead of giving him a pen, I pulled a tampon out of my apron pocket and handed it to him. FML

#20135099
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23949) - you deserved it (6905)

On 10/27/2012 at 2:42am - work - by geena - United States (Illinois)

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

#20134692
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (6216)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, I realized that my five-year-old daughters are deranged psychopaths, when one of them started screaming to get my attention while the other pulled the car door shut on my fingers. FML

#20134163
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22563) - you deserved it (2967)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

#20133994
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7967) - you deserved it (31942)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I woke up with pink eye. My mom tried to help by putting drops in. It started burning like hell; she didn't understand why. It turns out she was putting ear drops in my eye. FML

#20132231
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (1607)

On 10/25/2012 at 12:37am - health - by allison_fishing - United States

Today, my friend and I were walking home when we saw a patch of wet cement. Taking a page out of every single Disney movie ever made, we wrote our names in it. What Disney movies don't show is when the neighbors tattle on you and you have to pay $500 to get the cement redone. FML

#20132044
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8868) - you deserved it (29993)

On 10/24/2012 at 10:36pm - money - by onlyme (woman) - United States

Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML

#20128171
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24377) - you deserved it (6406)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:09pm - misc - by preggersmcgee (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML

#20117813
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34917) - you deserved it (2684)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:10am - intimacy - by scarred_sibling - United States

Today, my fiancé spent three hours arguing with his mom about how Scientology is a cult followed by simple-minded asshats; she shouted at him saying Xenu will come and fuck his shit up for not believing. This woman is going to be my children's grandmother. FML

#20117718
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22150) - you deserved it (2266)

On 10/15/2012 at 3:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

#20111636
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (4012)

On 10/11/2012 at 2:59am - kids - by Failed Parent - United States

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29093) - you deserved it (4847)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML

#20106895
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (4275)

On 10/08/2012 at 1:31am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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