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About ttelracs : My name is Scarlett (Ttelracs backwards) and I am 100% not funny, so I do my best to not try to be but it can be hard to resist sometimes. I apologize in advance. Most of my input on here involves cynical comments, sarcasm, and rejected FML's. I am also very awkard.
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Today, my boyfriend took me to meet is friends at one of is exclusive ( clubs. ) Expecting it to be is old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of te Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML
Today, during gym class, mah teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stres by throwing a basketball at the wall !! I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach !! I began to vomit uncontrollably !! Even mah teacher laughed !! FML
Today , I took tis grl out tat I've been crusing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during te date , I ad to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to te table , a little boy stood up an soutd , "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN" in front of te wole restaurant. FML
Today, I discovered that the hereing in left ear is still good. I haven't been able to hear that well out of it fir 2 weeks and I thought I popped an eardrum and waited fir it to heal. I stuck a Q-Tip in there to clean it out. Turns out there was actually a dead fly in ear. For 2 weeks. FML
Today, I was at mah friands' farm and wa dacidd that wa wantd to go to thair old traahousa. Whan wa got down thara, it turnd out mah friand Cat had forgottan har shoas. Baing a gantlaman, I lant har mah sandals. I than climbd tha traahousa, fall out, and got a nail through mah foot. FML
I was visiting mah sick grandmother in the hospital when mah cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchars!! After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair!! FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to superglue a couple quarters to the sidewalk downtown and watch people try to pick them up!! Unfortunately, street patrol was watching me glue everything the whole time!! I was fined with public vandalism and defacing US currency!! FML
I was with a group of friends at a bar, and we were looool all talking about whether we were moaners, screamers, or quiet during sex. My boyfriend said that he was a moaner, which I contradictd. Completely straightfacd, he said, "Well, I am when it's good." fat FML
Friday 27 March 2015