About ss521 : Hi! I like to go on this site on my phone when I'm bored or sad because it makes me laugh. Although, I am very easily amused. But um yeah. not much that's interesting about me. I'm very friendly and love to talk and meet new people tho!
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ss521's favorite FMLs
by took it / 02/09/2014 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health
by cryface / 02/06/2014 at 11:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML
by prochainefois / 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML
by Anonymous / 01/30/2014 at 7:34am / United States / Kids
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
by ChickenBallsPlease / 01/28/2014 at 6:16am / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Miscellaneous
by neighbor / 01/26/2014 at 8:08am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by MommyProblems / 01/19/2014 at 12:17am / United States / Kids
Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by DisturbedMan / 01/15/2014 at 5:29pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy
by jseid2 / 01/15/2014 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML
by Zach Got Robbed / 01/08/2014 at 6:02pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML
by stalked / 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by gottacatchemall / 01/08/2014 at 12:43am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/07/2014 at 4:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to do a little shopping at Victoria's Secret. The woman at the register smiled and asked, "Got a special someone to impress?" I told her that my boyfriend of three years was in town for New Year's and we haven't seen each other in months. Then I went home to my four cats. FML
by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 12:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
- Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the…