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Offline (the 07/15/2015 at 8:43pm)



  • Town/Country : Orlando, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 August 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2064
  • Number of comments : 277
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About pokefan813 : I used to be very active in around 2011 but nowadays I just lurk around. I doubt I'll comment that much anymore. And my god, what was I thinking with my horrible username? Blame 14 year old me, I guess. Anyway thanks for stopping by!

My favorite commenters ( no particular order) are:

pokefan813's page activity

Visits<b>frogger0709</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 8:32pm<b>whosthedeadone</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 12:43am<b>swervelol</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 8:39am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 1:51pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 6:59am<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 2:55am<b>Kilgore_Trout</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 4:52pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:26pm<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 8:20pm<b>tj1540</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 9:17am<b>PapaMoti</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 1:03am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 2:02am<b>Tacogamer20</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 8:45am<b>Catsss</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 9:48am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 5:44pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 4:21pm<b>Hyperspeed34</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 12:57am<b>fjsinedniend</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 8:05pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 11:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 2:35pm

pokefan813's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of pokefan813's badges

pokefan813's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

by Watchtower? More like fortress. / 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm / Norway (Oslo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

by L / 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

by cumhole / 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I fainted during my sister's wedding because my dress was too tight. When I woke up, she slapped me hard across the face. Why? Because I "took all the attention away" from her. FML

by brylynn / 08/25/2012 at 9:58pm / United States / Health

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

by Michael D. / 08/25/2012 at 12:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

by TheBeautifulOne / 08/23/2012 at 9:42am / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

by Sarah / 08/17/2012 at 3:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancée showed me her wedding plans. It will be themed on one of her video games, the best man will be dressed as an alien warlord, and the vows talk about how we'll beat the odds and be blessed by the "Goddess Kalahira". Apparently, I have no say in this. FML

by cestquoicebordel?? / 08/14/2012 at 6:50pm / France / Love

Today, I was at a concert. It was dark and everyone was singing and waving their lit-up phones in the air. I was having a great time, until someone snatched my £200 phone out of my hand. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2012 at 7:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

by mikeissad / 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML

by ohai95 / 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

by dawn / 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

by Rachel / 07/20/2012 at 1:13am / United States / Money