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mykeenblade

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mykeenblade

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  • Number of visits : 117
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mykeenblade's page activity

Visits<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:04pm

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mykeenblade's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, a good song came on and I started dancing to it. I guess security thought my Michael Jackson crotch-grab was funny, because a printout of it is now pinned in our break room. FML

#21351356
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25082) - you deserved it (10202)

On 02/07/2015 at 4:09am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I can't decide what's worse: the fact that my mother found my vibrator or that, as a prank, she replaced it with a realistic tarantula replica. She won't tell me where it is. FML

#21351119
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26653) - you deserved it (4185)

On 02/06/2015 at 7:57pm - misc - by go fuck myself - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

#21349488
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29337) - you deserved it (2216)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:44am - misc - by Sprinkles (man) - Australia

Today, I shaved for the first time. My mum gave me a razor and I spent about 20 minutes trying to use it. I gave up, yelling, "FUCK IT!" and put it back on the shelf. It fell, and as it hit the floor, a lid fell off. I'd tried to shave with a sheathed razor for 20 minutes. FML

#21349366
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14614) - you deserved it (38178)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:45pm - health - by februarymarchapril (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my 2-year-old brother is afraid of his own penis. Whenever he doesn't have a diaper on, he screams, cries and yells, "Ew". FML

#21347945
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30007) - you deserved it (2451)

On 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm - health - by okseñoryoucrazy - United States (Washington)

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

#21347895
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31223) - you deserved it (2288)

On 02/01/2015 at 6:10pm - health - by grossedout - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got back from a two-day trip for which I'd left my husband and kids at home. There's fresh vomit inside of my oven, and my 4 year old son has a mullet. FML

#21347579
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32109) - you deserved it (3682)

On 02/01/2015 at 12:50am - misc - by neverleavingagain (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26975) - you deserved it (2593)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, for the nth time, my father reminded me that I should study things related to the "real" world, as if I was studying theology, astrology or something. I'm studying for a master's degree in physics. FML

#21346352
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25565) - you deserved it (2100)

On 01/29/2015 at 6:32pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28029) - you deserved it (8293)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32752) - you deserved it (3406)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my 15 year old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

#21340484
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27777) - you deserved it (2264)

On 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27395) - you deserved it (3214)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

#21315008
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35513) - you deserved it (3718)

On 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by unlovedandunfucked (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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