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Offline (the 11/09/2014 at 11:48pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 22 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 879
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About melaniexoxob : Because im happpppy!

melaniexoxob's page activity

Visits<b>seeoseek</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 2:46pm<b>Pauschinator</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 7:39am<b>Trollx</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:43pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 7:56pm<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:46am<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:34pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 3:12pm<b>xx_ginny</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:25pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:36pm<b>chevythunderz71</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:28pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 2:25pm<b>Ltsdragons</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 10:38pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:35am<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 6:22pm<b>shibeep</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:27pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 4:51pm<b>xmoniax</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 11:59am

Fucked!<b>seeoseek</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 8:46pm<b>Pauschinator</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:15pm<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 9:01pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:25am

melaniexoxob's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of melaniexoxob's badges

melaniexoxob's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

by AnnoyedByFriends / 08/08/2013 at 12:43am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm / Egypt / Intimacy

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's dream came true; he had always wanted to break a bed during sex. The bed he broke was a heirloom in my family for 150 years. The best part: he was by himself. FML

by amiezingme / 07/26/2013 at 9:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing solitaire when an achievement popped up on my phone. "You have just completed your 1000th game of solitaire!" Never felt so alone in my life. FML

by solitaire / 07/20/2013 at 4:14am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I announced my third pregnancy to my family. My dad's only reaction was to scoff, "Really? Stop breeding already." FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2013 at 4:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML

by realitybites / 07/08/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I found my cat dead on the road. I called my family and told them, and later buried the cat. Not long after I got done burying it, my cat walked up to me. I buried someone else's cat. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 12:10pm / United States (Utah) / Animals

Today, a wasp flew into my car. In my frantic attempt to get away from it, I got pulled over and had to prove I was driving sober. FML

by chaoticcupcake / 06/25/2013 at 11:28am / United States (West Virginia) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my parents blew my entire college fund in their quest to finish building their replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

by future burger flipper / 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money

Today, I locked my keys in my car. Good thing I went to Lowe's to make spares, which are also now locked in the car. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2013 at 12:50am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

by pixkalexi / 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don't understand the bond between him and his stuffed goose. He's 36. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 12:18am / United States / Love