house51

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Offline (the 09/28/2014 at 6:32pm)

house51

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 October 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 557
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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house51's page activity

Visits<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:37pm<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 12:14am<b>foreverhappy98</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:51pm<b>J215B</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:55pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 8:54pm<b>dingostacy</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 5:28pm<b>ktmla</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:35pm<b>AnalAssault123</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 10:38pm<b>r_u_happy</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 12:33am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 10:58pm<b>ItsMissLia</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 7:05pm<b>belljars</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 12:32am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:56pm<b>FMLL2016</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 6:35pm<b>_G0D_</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 9:50pm<b>atl904</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 1:18am<b>parism143</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 12:30am<b>juan3611</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 3:40pm

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house51's favorite FMLs

Today, a drunken guest in the hotel I work at has barricaded himself in the employee restroom and refuses to come out, unless I "promise to love him forever." It's 4am and I'm the only one here. FML

Today, it's been a week since I found an egg in the street that had seemingly fallen out of a nest. I'd bought a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it. It's thus been a week that I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato. FML

by mac cayne / 05/01/2014 at 11:13pm / France (Alsace) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting a girl I like, explaining how she looks like an attractive celebrity. She responded with a picture of a very unattractive lady and asked if she looked like that. I told her if she had been caught in a burning building, then yes, that would look like her. It was of her mom. FML

by spencerlong / 04/24/2014 at 11:02pm / United States (Washington) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

by now have a cat / 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

by systematicpanic / 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Work

Today, my boyfriend asked me if we were going to become "that stupid couple that sings cheesy songs to each other." I just spent the past 3 months writing the perfect song that I was planning on singing to him tonight. FML

by wabbyfish / 03/13/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

by ConfusedDad / 12/29/2013 at 2:01am / United States / Kids

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

by dr immature / 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, during a job interview, I was offered a sandwich. I politely declined, explaining that I'm a coeliac and would probably get very sick. He said coeliac disease "isn't real" and that gluten-free eating is just a fad. I had to leave when he kept pushing me to accept it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2013 at 1:02am / Norway / Health

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

by Ashamed_Sister / 11/30/2013 at 2:35am / Namibia (Windhoek) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it was my turn to have the trophy my baseball team won a few weeks ago. I then find out that my brother and his buddies thought it would be funny to fill the trophy up with beer, drink the beer, and then pee in it. Not only is it over 50yrs old, it stinks of pee and is due back tomorrow. FML

by itendstonight / 08/09/2009 at 8:42am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous