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eternalibra

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eternalibra
  • Town/Country : south jersey, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 October 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 3668
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About eternalibra : My name is Mallory.
Users I like:
every1luvsboners
perdix
kingdingaling
pendatik
docbastard

eternalibra's last visitors

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eternalibra's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of eternalibra's badges

eternalibra's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

#210718
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20452) - you deserved it (235634)

On 03/04/2009 at 8:13pm - health - by sheyo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218700) - you deserved it (28164)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my very religious grandmother walked in on me masturbating. She's sending me to bible camp. FML

#197450
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69048) - you deserved it (23405)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by camp (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

#185544
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70515) - you deserved it (15301)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by ohmygoodness (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at church and saw a blind teenager who obviously felt lost. Feeling like I should help I went over and asked if he needed anything. He said, "I can't find my caretaker." I asked, "What does she look like?" FML

#159157
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13389) - you deserved it (56718)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by wideman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML

#152273
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43346) - you deserved it (12731)

On 02/27/2009 at 12:43pm - misc - by wwasmer (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML

#150078
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16228) - you deserved it (45901)

On 02/27/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by beachbum (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

#142795
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (239785) - you deserved it (56616)

On 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Picaresque (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

#125499
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78098) - you deserved it (19393)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm - intimacy - by Menareidiots (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I called the florist and ordered a flower arrangement for my grandma, who I was told was sick. I said I didn't know what to get her, so just to send her something nice. I got a call from my mom calling me an inconsiderate bastard. They sent my grandma forget-me-nots. She has Alzheimers. FML

#117948
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38749) - you deserved it (5940)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by Originality18 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I called the florist and ordered a flower arrangement for my grandma, who I was told was sick. I said I didn't know what to get her, so just to send her something nice. I got a call from my mom calling me an inconsiderate bastard. They sent my grandma forget-me-nots. She has Alzheimers. FML

#117948
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38749) - you deserved it (5940)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by Originality18 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

#99945
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70767) - you deserved it (6535)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by not getting any anymore (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

#62507
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28008) - you deserved it (7686)

On 02/17/2009 at 6:56pm - work - by jessica (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had sex for the first time with a guy. After he passionately made love to me, I turned to him and said "you smell really good." He turned to me and said "You don't." FML

#59427
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45850) - you deserved it (10994)

On 02/17/2009 at 3:10am - intimacy - by pixie (woman) - United States (New York)



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