daniellekimberly

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Offline (the 09/24/2016 at 8:45pm)

daniellekimberly

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daniellekimberly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1276
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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daniellekimberly's page activity

Visits<b>DA_JUDGE123</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 12:12am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 11:52pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 9:57am<b>thewoodinator96</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:45am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 4:51am<b>chewsef</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:06am<b>Seuqrow</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:29am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:55am<b>pks2014</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 4:24am<b>andrewhoyt</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 11:33pm<b>braver7315</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 1:30pm<b>ershadq</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 7:36pm<b>horseh</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:26am<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:07pm<b>blade9502</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 8:59am<b>lola4455</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 11:00am<b>Weemandarin</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:42pm<b>CollinCrafts</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 10:06pm

Fucked!<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 5:55am<b>robsmit98</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 3:58pm<b>thewoodinator96</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:46pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 10:52am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 6:34am<b>DA_JUDGE123</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 12:41am<b>ershadq</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 12:37am

daniellekimberly's FML badges

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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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daniellekimberly's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML

by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, traffic was so bad that I was able to connect to the WiFi of a nearby McDonald's and successfully listen to a 30-minute podcast. FML

by Mcwifi / 04/21/2016 at 1:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my class was given the assignment to have an informal discussion, debating who would be the best fit for president of the US. The school's security guards were called in after the Trump supporters started fights with everyone else. FML

by Off to Canada / 03/16/2016 at 3:48am / Hong Kong / Miscellaneous

Today, as a mascot for a pet store, I had to fake my own death to stop a little girl having a temper tantrum because she couldn't take me home. FML

by Wolf6661 / 03/14/2016 at 2:29pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to a horrible smell only to realize that my dog had peed all over my leg cast during the night. I can't get another one because the closest doctors are all on Christmas vacation. Guess this is an early Christmas present from my dog. FML

by ChaoticGamer / 12/23/2015 at 10:15am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my 6-year-old daughter watched The Lion King for the first time. Now, whenever I ask her to do something, she replies "Hakuna Matata" and doesn't even get up. I think she took "no worries" to mean "don't give a shit about anything". FML

by anon / 12/04/2015 at 7:32pm / United States / Kids

Today, my parents pranked me hard. They spent breakfast messing with my head, all to convince me that I was dreaming. I got so excited at finally having a lucid dream that I ran outside in my pajamas, yelling "Woo-hoo!" and trying to fly. Nothing happened. People saw. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

by jack / 08/27/2015 at 6:56am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, while I was taking a long relaxing shower, the shower head decided to fly off and hit me in the face. The dentist couldn't stop laughing. FML

by sstahpp / 08/20/2015 at 5:24pm / South Africa (Gauteng) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML

by dirtbikeguy / 07/23/2015 at 9:05am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I'm so out of shape that I got winded from getting out of bed. FML

by Jack Shart Jr. / 07/08/2015 at 11:16am / United States / Health

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, my brother tried cremating our deceased cat. In the oven. My nose has killed itself. FML

by thatguy8878 / 06/26/2015 at 4:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I left my dog in my car for 5 minutes while I ran into a store. The car was running so he was fine, the thing that wasn't so fine is that when I walked out my car wasn't there. My dog somehow moved my car into the middle of a intersection, almost causing an accident. FML

by ej6901 / 06/23/2015 at 4:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I took new sleeping meds. One of the side effects was sleepwalking. I had a dream my girlfriend wanted me to pee on her. Apparently, while sleepwalking, I pissed all over our dog. FML

by feels like an asshole / 06/09/2015 at 4:03pm / United States / Health