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Offline (the 09/06/2016 at 2:09pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18993
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>df21312</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 11:50am<b>BirdMockingBlack</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 2:06pm<b>leigh_xx</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 10:57pm<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 9:50pm<b>TheNoNameGuy</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:01am<b>StaceeeP</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:18pm<b>nickie_94</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:04am<b>Technastar</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 5:39am<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 9:04am<b>Litarius</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 7:15pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Big_Bawws</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 12:49pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:55pm<b>k_lylepad</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 2:55pm<b>trellz17</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 11:23am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 3:01am<b>chilldude69</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:18pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:24am

Fucked!<b>df21312</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 5:50pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 7:55pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:54am<b>YBae</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 2:41am<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 7:55am<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 10:01pm<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

bmba94's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of bmba94's badges

bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

by lambeaster / 01/20/2016 at 9:27am / United States (District of Columbia) / Kids

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, a friend told me that when I read, I make all the expressions the characters in the book are making. Apparently, I have been doing this since I was a kid, and no one ever told me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2016 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at college, I asked the girl who usually sits next to me if she wanted to team up on our latest assignment. She gave me a disgusted look, said "Um, I'm MARRIED. Creep." and walked away. Seriously, what the fuck? FML

by kevinfmls / 01/15/2016 at 10:27pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I accidentally broke an expensive glass display shelf at work. My coworker joked, "Ooh, that's gonna come out of your paycheck!" My boss thought that was a great idea. FML

by 73012211 / 01/15/2016 at 3:21pm / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got pulled off a hugely important project, all because I accidentally spelled "country" as "cuntry" in an email to our client. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2016 at 12:47pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

by sciencenat / 01/14/2016 at 1:36am / Work

Today, after months of trying to train my cockatiel to perch on my finger, he finally trusted me enough to fly from his cage and land on my hand. I panicked and accidentally backhanded him across the room. FML

by parasheeeet / 01/13/2016 at 12:05pm / United States (Alabama) / Animals

Today, I finished reading a manga series on a website I go on all the time. As I read the last page I got a huge celebratory message from the website saying I was the first one to read every manga on their site. The website opened in 2011 and has over 30,000 manga. My God, I need a social life. FML

by Lesser spotted female gaming nerd / 01/11/2016 at 9:47pm / United States (Virginia) / Geek

Today, I found out that my crush of a few years likes me. How? Her boyfriend told me, followed by a punch in the face. FML

by anon / 01/11/2016 at 12:21pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

by Bex98 / 01/11/2016 at 3:17am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a customer's credit card was declined. His totally reasonable reaction was to threaten to put a bullet in the back of my head. FML

by retail can shart a cock / 01/09/2016 at 12:25am / United States / Work

Today, I was showing my step-dad old photos of the family. We got to a picture of me and I mentioned how much weight I've lost. He muttered, "Heh, fat AND blind". FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2016 at 11:01pm / Argentina (Buenos Aires) / Miscellaneous

Today, after waiting in front of a washroom stall for 20 minutes to take a dump, I finally realized that the "person" in the stall was just a pair of shoes. FML

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

by anne / 01/07/2016 at 7:00am / Germany / Intimacy