About ajeppsen : You're probably visiting me because I pissed you off, I'm sorry. Or maybe because I made a kickass comment, stay tuned for more to come! EIther way your visiting my profile and that makes me happy, I don't get a lot of company, it is lonely here. Message me? I'll respond!
ajeppsen's FML badges
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
ajeppsen's favorite FMLs
Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML
by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I did the "walk of shame" sixteen blocks. It wouldn't have been so bad if the sidewalks and streets weren't completely covered in ice. Somewhere along the way I lost what little dignity I had left, along with my left shoe. FML
by Anonymous / 12/21/2013 at 6:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by ouch / 12/19/2013 at 11:41pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by eer004 / 12/07/2013 at 5:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
by fuck my eyeballs / 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Work
by Cheer4Life / 11/11/2013 at 4:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Thomas / 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, I've been awake for nearly three days due to homework and my mom's wedding preparations, so I took some adderall to keep me awake at school. I took too much, totally zoned out in class, became hopelessly fascinated by my own hand, and was accused of doing drugs. FML
by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health
Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm / United Kingdom (Derry) / Miscellaneous
Today, I failed on a school presentation because I was not prepared. Apparently, the fact that my computer crapped itself and started giving off smoke last period isn't a good reason for not having my presentation prepared. FML
by pissedandcomputerless / 11/07/2013 at 1:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss made me play golf with some executives of a company we're hoping to secure a business deal with, despite me having no golf training. My first swing ended up with me being rushed to the hospital. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2013 at 5:40pm / United States (Maryland) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 09/21/2013 at 12:07am / United States (Mississippi) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm / Switzerland (Bern) / Work
- Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over… Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning… Today, marks the second week straight without sex. Being a newlywed isn't as great as I thought. FML