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aisg

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aisg
  • Town/Country : San Ramon, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 622
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About aisg : Nothing much to know, I use mobile so I probably won't see any messages

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aisg's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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aisg's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

#20185812
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6640) - you deserved it (27925)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my house with my friend, only to discover my husband half-naked and yelling at the TV screen over a soccer game. By half-naked, I mean he was only wearing a shirt. FML

#20169569
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19113) - you deserved it (2114)

On 11/19/2012 at 2:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

#20127667
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26170) - you deserved it (1324)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:07am - work - by Lunazel93 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that even though your brother agrees to watch your dogs for a week, it does not mean that he will pick up after them. Apparently, it's okay to leave piss and shit all over the deck and floors because they're not his dogs and he shouldn't have to clean up their messes. FML

#20120904
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17878) - you deserved it (3353)

On 10/17/2012 at 11:53am - animals - by JennyPenny (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML

#20103865
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17792) - you deserved it (1194)

On 10/06/2012 at 3:12am - health - by monkers - Canada (Alberta)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35709) - you deserved it (7805)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30683) - you deserved it (3891)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I kindly asked my boyfriend to shave his pubic hair to make oral sex more enjoyable for me. He declined, saying, "Think of it as flossing your teeth. I'm doing you a much needed favor." FML

#19803721
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26700) - you deserved it (4779)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by turnedoff (woman) - United States

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

#19494291
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22664) - you deserved it (2149)

On 04/19/2012 at 2:24am - money - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I finally asked some friends to read the beginning of a novel that I'd been slaving away at. One of them said it was the literary equivalent of aquarium gravel. Another asked if I'd been sniffing boot polish while writing it. FML

#19493868
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15838) - you deserved it (3859)

On 04/19/2012 at 12:46am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML

#19488517
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8622) - you deserved it (16757)

On 04/18/2012 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my seven-year-old told me to lose weight. Her reason? There's a family fun day coming up at her school and she is embarrassed. FML

#19447542
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14886) - you deserved it (17762)

On 04/11/2012 at 1:04am - kids - by vanessax (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

#19289453
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18405) - you deserved it (10456)

On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland



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