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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5109
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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acs123acs's page activity

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Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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acs123acs's favorite FMLs

Today, my teacher plugged the speakers into the wrong input on his computer, and said, "Oops, wrong hole", to which one of the students who often makes the same mistake said, "Story of my life". I understood it differently and started laughing. It would have been fine if the teacher wasn't her father. FML

Today, my 5-year-old won't stop princess-waving at people. This would be fine, but she looks exactly like she is giving the Nazi salute. I got dirty looks from nearly everyone at the supermarket. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23212) - you deserved it (2143)

On 07/08/2015 at 11:13pm - kids - by momoftheyearedition - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26025) - you deserved it (2829)

On 07/05/2015 at 11:18pm - misc - by madisonnkelly - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a phone call from the counselor at my son's preschool, requesting that I come pick him up. He was barking incessantly at his classmates. And when they asked him to stop, he growled. FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50439) - you deserved it (14349)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40966) - you deserved it (7356)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40434) - you deserved it (3458)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (42030) - you deserved it (5239)

On 11/23/2014 at 11:34am - intimacy - by 404: fuck not given (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45706) - you deserved it (7009)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45326) - you deserved it (3720)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:24am - work - by HowAreYouAlive - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you deserved it (5297)

On 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm - animals - by Jack00412 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML


I agree, your life sucks (53912) - you deserved it (11810)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49474) - you deserved it (29526)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm - kids - by outsmartedbykids (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50947) - you deserved it (6682)

On 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm - misc - by N O - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53213) - you deserved it (5057)

On 05/26/2014 at 6:34pm - misc - by megangubler - United States (Illinois)

G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

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  • Hardcore will never die, but you will. We’re back with some rock n roll, or dare I say it, some punk rock. Don't run away, it's not that terrible stuff that emo kids listen to while slashing their…

Friday 2 October 2015

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