About KandyK16 : .
KandyK16's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
KandyK16's favorite FMLs
by IDon't / 10/13/2013 at 6:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML
by Water Daughter / 10/13/2013 at 1:51am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went home after work with my best friend who I am also secretly in love with. We had a few drinks, were getting touchy, and one thing led to another. Before leaving, I got the courage to ask her out on a real date. Her only reply was, "I don't want to lose such a good friend." FML
by Medication / 10/12/2013 at 11:31am / United States / Intimacy
by Itsnotmeitsyou / 10/11/2013 at 2:09am / Australia / Work
Today, during a family dinner, my 5-year-old son excitedly told everyone that I let him use my "douche" last week. My parents glared at me in anger and horror, and only after they left did I find out that his brother had told him that's what my loofah is called. FML
by Lady Douche of Asscrackington / 10/10/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by happyturtle / 10/10/2013 at 7:27am / Croatia / Miscellaneous
by yeah hun i think insects arent animals too / 10/09/2013 at 3:51am / Germany (Sachsen) / Love
by Anon / 10/09/2013 at 1:21am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/08/2013 at 12:04pm / United States / Love
Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML
by thisguy / 10/08/2013 at 5:55am / United States (California) / Kids
by Cereal_mistress / 10/07/2013 at 2:54pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/06/2013 at 12:44am / United States / Kids
Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML
by Anonymous / 10/05/2013 at 4:23pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Animals
Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML
by british_babe / 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by pancakelicious / 10/04/2013 at 7:16am / New Zealand / Intimacy
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I went to the Eiffel Tower with my boyfriend. We’d been talking about getting married for a… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was…