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DumbAndYoung's FML badges
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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
DumbAndYoung's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/15/2016 at 10:08pm / United States (Washington) / Work
by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
by albinoalligator / 07/03/2016 at 8:48pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 12:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I faced my fears. I've always had a weird fear of looking out of windows at night, afraid a face would suddenly appear. When I heard a strange noise outside, I looked out the window. Sure enough, the face of a man suddenly appeared. FML
by NeverLookingAgain / 12/29/2015 at 11:16pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband finally revealed that he's been secretly buying a particular brand of spicy chicken, eating it on his way home from work. He does it because it makes his farts smell just the way he likes it under the duvet when we go to bed. FML
by tara / 12/18/2015 at 12:49pm / Switzerland (Zug) / Miscellaneous
by CaraMaria / 11/24/2015 at 4:02am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that your crotch can just light up on the body scanner in the airport for no apparent reason; and when that happens, a thorough pat down of that area will be performed by a confused security officer. FML
by Traveler / 10/08/2015 at 10:06pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML
by NothowIimaginedmyday / 10/03/2015 at 12:00am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 9:33pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/18/2015 at 9:26am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, a guy asked me out on Facebook, then called me a conceited bitch when I said no. I don't know, dude; maybe it's just that I already have a boyfriend, that you asked me out on Facebook, and that you posted the same message on 4 other girls' walls as well. FML
by sonice / 08/17/2015 at 11:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to my car with 600 dollars worth of books because I start college next week, when I was robbed by some guy that sounded like Cartman. He punched me because I could not stop laughing whenever he would try to threaten me. FML
by OhWhoCares / 08/17/2015 at 5:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/05/2015 at 1:56pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and… Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By… Today, as my dad was handing me my Christmas gift, he pats me on the shoulder and says, "These were…