About AlexandraShD : 20. Moving to NYC in September 2015.
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
AlexandraShD's favorite FMLs
Today, after my girlfriend has recently become obsessed with the serial-killer show, Dexter, she has grown an interest in cutting up pomegranates in many different ways and squirting the red, blood-like juice everywhere. I am now afraid to argue with her. FML
by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML
by n1a1t1h1a1n1 / 12/11/2012 at 2:15am / United States (California) / Kids
by mdg / 12/04/2012 at 12:16pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work
Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML
by sarahcurtis213 / 11/13/2012 at 2:36am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my family and I are sitting in our house while Hurricane Sandy is going on. My grandma is freaking out because she believes it's our recently deceased dog Sandy getting revenge for putting her to sleep and getting a new dog. FML
by With_Love929 / 10/29/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (New York) / Animals
by StormSeason / 10/29/2012 at 8:03am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by prettylady? / 10/28/2012 at 12:22am / United States / Love
by stop it ninja / 10/14/2012 at 3:00am / United States (Virginia) / Animals
Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML
by Patrick / 10/14/2012 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/15/2012 at 7:36am / United States (Delaware) / Health
Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML
by thefuckman / 09/14/2012 at 3:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/03/2012 at 4:47am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML
by NoMagicMike / 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML
by ugh / 06/08/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
by rongo12 / 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…