Nearly FMLs

By orcatheseapanda - 02/04/2016 18:17 - Thailand - Changwat Udon Thani

Today, my 8 year-old brother deleted an important report I was working on. When I confronted him about it, he started faking tears and ran crying to our mom. I'm now grounded for being 'too harsh' on his 'childish behavior'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By teenagesyndrome - 02/04/2016 18:11 - United States - Windsor

Today, while spending time with my girlfriend, my ex called her out of nowhere. Apparently, they've been talking for weeks, and my ex has been trying to spoon feed my current girlfriend lies about me, including but not limited to: cheating, watching child pornography, and kicking dogs. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By anonymous - 02/04/2016 18:10 - United States - Somerset

Today, I was supposed to finally hang out with this guy I've been talking to for the past two weeks but haven't had free time. Today is also the day I woke up with 103 fever that's lasting the whole weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 18:06 - United States

Today I came home to my boyfriend being fucked by his dog. He didn't consider it cheating and doesn't think he did anything wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By anon - 02/04/2016 18:04 - United States - Bellingham

Today, I woke up to half of my last nights nightmare coming true, laying in a puddle of my own blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By fuckhinson - 02/04/2016 18:01 - United States

Today, I got out of jail thinking I was going to be reunited with my daughters mother after a year apart and 8 months in jail. She's been sleeping with my best friend. They're in love and she's pregnant with his kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 17:58 - United States - San Jose

Today, I was supposed to take a test that would allow me to sign-up for upper-division classes at my college. My car broke down on the way to the testing place and I was 10 minutes late. The test proctors told me, "No late arrivals! No Exceptions!" and just left me there outside the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By Mywholelife - 02/04/2016 17:53 - United States

Today, while doing a theater rehearsal, I got blinded by a light, tripped and broke my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 17:52 - United States - Columbus

Today, I asked my oldest friend if she would be my new baby's godmother. she responded by telling me she has always been in love with me and wants me to leave my wife for her. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Tayleena97 - 02/04/2016 17:52 - United States - Bedford Hills

Today, I was finally able to dye my hair after saving up for months. Turns out my skin is super sensitive to the chemicals and now my head, ears, and parts of my face are burned. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By RocketGirl92 - 02/04/2016 17:50 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I accepted a job in the state I'm vacationing in, so I can be close to my parents, as they wished, giving up my previous dream job so I could see them happy. Today also happened to be the day my mom decided she doesn't want me here. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 17:36 - United States - Fremont

Today, during an important job interview, I saw a large, black spider. I jumped up, and accidentally knocked the coffeemaker onto the interviewer's head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 17:33 - United States - Portland

Today I finally went to investigate the hoard odor coming from my roommate's room for the last month, only to find his rotting corpse on the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By m - 02/04/2016 17:24 - United States - Valley Park

Today, my in-laws moved in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70

You deserved it 10

By screwed - 02/04/2016 17:04 - United States - Zionsville

Today, I found out that I cannot enroll for a class because the system thinks I haven't taken the prereq. even though I already did. No one is available to talk to since it's Saturday and the class is filling up fast. If I do not get in, it sets my graduation/postgrad plans back at least a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 17:02 - Australia

Today, while I was cleaning up the mess my nephew made in the kitchen, he decided to take a leap of faith and went straight through our very expensive glass coffee table. I spent the next half hour cleaning glass and arranging his ambulance trip. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By flutenin - 02/04/2016 16:49 - United States - Maiden

Today, while at the store a random kid walked up to me, punched me is the stomach and call me a weak ass punk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Baby face - 02/04/2016 16:41 - Canada - Comox

Today I started student teaching at an elementary school. I do look a tad on the younger side. While eating my lunch in the teachers lounge, a teacher came up to me and said "Well it must be your lucky day! How did you manage to get in here? Shouldn't you be with your classmates"? Im 24. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By LoveSucksIKnow - 02/04/2016 16:15 - United States - Buffalo

Today, was mine and my girlfriend 4 year anniversary since we started dating. She went to a party, I went to the casino. I lost all of my money, she cheated on me. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By bradybut302 - 02/04/2016 16:10 - United States - Macomb

Today, I went to my new car that I just leased 3 days ago after spending 15 minutes in the grocery store only to find that somebody ran into the front bumper for $1000 in damages. Better yet, they didn't leave a note. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By yoooooogiv - 02/04/2016 16:01 - United States - Old Town

Today, my grandparents objected at my wedding because my soon-to-be wife wasn't pretty enough for their liking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 15:52 - United States

My wife wanted a divorce and I had proof of her unfaithfulness. I didn't hire a lawyer. An anonymous tip said I was suicidal a day prior to court. I spent 5 days in the hospital. When I got out, she had won the house, alimony, and full custody of our 4 kids with no ability to contest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By anon - 02/04/2016 15:46 - United States - Phoenixville

Today, I woke up to a snapchat story of my girlfriend cheating on me at 3am this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 15:30 - United States

Today, my twin brother got drunk, so I took him to my home to prevent him from driving. I went back out to the bar. I forgot to tell my wife, and when I came back they were banging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By zeldah - 02/04/2016 15:22 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I had to give my little brother the talk. Why? He didn't wait till his morning wood settled down (nor did he aim) before he pissed all over my bathroom, not a drop entering my toilet. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By anonymous - 02/04/2016 15:15 - United States - Taylor

Today, I found out my girlfriend wasn't joking when she said she was pregnant on April Fools Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 15:04 - United States

Today while looking at porn, I saw my girlfriend of 2 years on the website. I saw her in the side advertisement banner under local singles who want to hook up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By ohgodwhy - 02/04/2016 15:01 - United States - Lynn

Today, I called my grandparents to talk to them, and they mentioned that they "upgraded" their computer from Windows Vista to Windows 10. I'm their go-to tech support. This is going to be a pain in the rear when they have some problems. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 14:57 - United States - Laguna Niguel

Today, I found out the reason my sister has been hiding her fiancé from me is because she's afraid he'll see my "fugly" face and break up with her so his kids don't get my genes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 14:51 - United States - Rancho Cordova

Today, my husband's Doctor accidentally removed the wrong testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I pooped in a drug store bathroom but forgot to flush. I left to go find my mom and found her in the toy section. I guess after I had walked away oblivious, a woman had walked into the bathroom behind me and found the kids I'd abandoned. She then came and found my mom and me, then yelled at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 1 276

Today, I got yelled at by my supervisor for getting an hour of overtime yesterday. The reason I had an hour of overtime was because that same supervisor made me stay late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 113

You deserved it 1 062

Today, I made eye contact with a cute guy from across a packed train. He then yelled out, in front of everyone, "You've got foam on your nose!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 436

You deserved it 4 048

Today, I realized my coworker can't comprehend English, or any other language. When I mentioned this to a coworker, they accused me of being an ableist. This is the same person who insults him to his face, knowing he can't understand her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 108

Today, I had sex with a guy wearing a KFC uniform. Hat included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 812

You deserved it 74 107

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she could not stand the thought of being in a relationship with a man who wears orange. This is the first time I've worn an orange shirt in at least 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 403

You deserved it 3 656