Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML
Today, a patient came to the ER at 4 a.m., but left complaining I wasn't treating him properly. I treated his toothache with painkillers that would get him through the night so he could contact a dentist the next day. He showed me a TikTok video of the tooth surgery that he supposedly needed instead. FML
Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML
Today, my manager took me aside and angrily told me to quit fucking about with our customers. He totally refuses to believe that the slight whistling sound I keep making when I exhale is because I have a chipped tooth. FML
Today, I was at my job where we buy precious metals. A man came in and said, "Here, I have something special for you." He then pulled a tooth out of his mouth that had dental gold on it and placed in it my bare hand. Yeah, special indeed. FML
Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML
Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled. The numbing medication didn't work, so I felt everything. I was in so much pain that I accidentally bit down on the dentist's finger, causing him to yell in agony. Now, I have to find a new dentist. FML
Today, at my store, I had an old man violently accuse me of charging him for an extra pack of 99¢ Mounds candy yesterday. He held up my line for 10 minutes, fighting me about it. I didn't even work yesterday. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Well I hope you stroked it for him... His cheek I mean.
ManInTheMachine 20
I would just play along, and be a good employee. Unless the next thing he asks for is the Viagra. Then get your manager, and a restraining order.
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Comments (88)
nia96_fml 8
That's not creepy at all...0.0
hockeychicl003 6
Do you wonder if he meant the cheek on his face or....
eur0 14
YDI for having teeth O.P
FastidiousPear 6
Pooth-aches?
mystical_child 6
Sounds like something master Rochi would start off saying..
mystical_child 6
Roshi* ^^
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Well I hope you stroked it for him... His cheek I mean.
CheeseTron 15
Yea, don't encourage him. Next time he'll come in complaining that his penis hurts.
blackzi11a 7
Remember, the customer is always right!
theycallmekitty 13
I agree with 32, don't encourage him. Last time I was especially nice to an old person, he held me up in Waffle House for an hour performing a penny "trick" where he would put it in my hand then snatch it out really quickly. Then he started talking about his deceased wife and things got really awkward....
CheeseTron 15
So, basically, the moral of #66 story is don't be friendly towards old people.
theycallmekitty 13
I just wanted to leave and I didn't know how to respond to a stranger telling me all this personal information
PizzaRollsss 5
Well, seems like you better get to stroking!
kingsian 15
Im going to need you to touch my cheek
Shmatterhorn 38
That's just wrong.
kingsian 15
No it's not. What's wrong is the fact everybody and they mama have to thumb me down because a joke I tried to make. She said she has the magic touch so I said she can touch my cheek too.
mistercrow 9
LOL ^_^
outoftown 27
#65, No, that's not what you said. I'll just leave you to a quiet burial.
kingsian 15
Nooooooooo come on everybody all I need is 26 "thumbs up" and I can be good. There's still time.
ManInTheMachine 20
I would just play along, and be a good employee. Unless the next thing he asks for is the Viagra. Then get your manager, and a restraining order.
untouchable763 10
Should of slapped him upside the face and said ok fixed.
tanekdrachonae 19
And lost their job. Yeah, that's a fantastic idea....
sens3sfailing 25
hey! look what I found! it was your sense of humor...
BntyHntrSeattle 30
*Loud cough to gain attention,* should HAVE, *discreet cough to recede into darkness once more.*
lilhellian 27
How dare you hog your magic touch! Your "special" gifts must be shared.. Profits? Your choice tho..
loserboii 11
Which cheeks? I hope he means his face.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
He's either a cheeky ass, or just a perv...
DocBastard 40
Careful with the elderly - I hear giving them a stroke is bad.
Schizomaniac 24
us*
DocBastard 40
"Aren't inside jokes fun for everyone!" said no one, ever.
mario2012 18
20:Huh?
Schizomaniac 24
I live only to serve you.
ManInTheMachine 20
Mario: Schizo was implying that Doc is old. He replaced *them with *us.
mario2012 18
Ah. I didn't catch that. Thanks.