The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

He's having a normal one

By Omydarlin - 16/11/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 115

Don't you want me baby?

By Ugh - 05/12/2024 20:00 - Romania

Today, I was dead tired and just wanted sleep, so I jumped into bed the second the day's chores were done. Of fucking course, this was the day my fiancée decided to end our eight-week dry spell and came in wearing sexy lingerie. I couldn't stay hard due to exhaustion, and now she's been crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 190

Genius mode

By Dumbass Dude - 24/05/2019 14:10

Today, I pulled into a parking lot, for the car to simply shut off because I ran out of gas. Then I couldn't get the key out of the ignition, so I called my dad, who walked all the way to where I was, only to find out that the car was still in drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 2 205

Cancel the wedding

By Anonymous - 02/11/2022 14:00

Today, I tried to talk to my soon-to-be-husband about how he needs to take a more active approach in his own life. It devolved to him screaming at me and putting words in my mouth. This has been going on for six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 696

My body hates me

By Anonymous - 01/05/2023 18:00 - United States - Elizabeth City

Today, like many other days before, my allergies decided, "screw you, you're dealing with me year round, no allergy medicine will keep me away, and you're going to break out in sneezing fits at the worst possible moments, which includes while you're driving on the highway." Shocking that I haven't been in a wreck yet, but still… FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 120

Shame about the view

By Anonymous - 21/08/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I was admiring my nice clean windows. Our window cleaners have to abseil down my apartment building to get it done, so they don't come often, as it's a big job. I was enjoying the sparkling view, until a seagull shat right across my window. Guess I'm looking at that for months now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 110

Classic internet marketplace

By Anonymous - 17/08/2023 04:00

Today, I put something up for sale online. I provided all pertinent information in the description, and I had about a dozen replies. From the questions they asked, I have to conclude that NONE of those people actually read the description. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 83

Proud Papa moment

By Anonymous - 19/11/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter turned up at my house because her boyfriend kicked her out. I rang him and it turns out his love and affection and even the time he spent getting to know her kids wasn’t enough for her, my daughter just had to throw it all away by sucking her coworker's dick in her boyfriend's bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 157

Here comes trouble

By Anonymous - 11/11/2023 00:02

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's new friend is actually her "replacement". They met a few months ago, and she's really cool, we share the same interests, it's nice to spend time with her, etc., but my girlfriend planned to break up with me and "trained" her because she doesn't want me to be lonely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 147

Always check before sending

By Anonymous - 07/03/2023 06:00

Today, and for a while now, my phone has been autocorrecting "I love you" to "I lobsters." My girlfriend almost believes I have some sort of a seafood fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 197

Nature hates me

By Anonymous - 19/10/2021 05:00

Today, we all know how terrible those long, silent farts can be, right? Especially when they’re coming from your expensive, self-inflating air mattress, and you’re just about the farthest distance from home on a bikepacking trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 184

Useful friends

By The One - 28/08/2021 04:01 - Turkey - Istanbul

Today, after having a fight with my BFF, she invited me to come along to a party. I found out later that she'd only invited me so that when returning from the event, we could take a taxi and split the cost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 117

Bursting out

By Myth Confirmed - 26/10/2023 10:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, I overheard my brother telling my son and his male cousins, who all think he's a cool uncle, that, "Only women can sneeze and fart at the same time." I decided to intervene, and gave him a scolding of a lifetime in front of them. Let's just say, I had to sneeze while in the middle of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 460

First class slob

By Anonymous - 11/12/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I overheard my husband admitting that he doesn’t wash his hands after having diarrhea. I had no prior knowledge of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 107

OCD or just a dingus?

By Anonymous - 26/04/2023 06:00 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I came home from class to find a nasty note on my roommate's toaster oven. Apparently, cleaning it once a week isn't enough, and she wants it cleaned right after using it, which she never told me all school year. I'm banned from using it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 340

You can't hurry love

By giffinator6 - 01/09/2023 10:00

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years left me for a girl he's barely known for 3 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 130

The cake from hell

By Anonymous - 24/03/2023 18:00

Today, I tried to bake a cake for my friend's birthday. It turned out looking more like a science experiment gone wrong than a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 211

Overreaction much?

By Broke af - 15/07/2024 20:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, while at work in a medical office, I had the itchiest and most distracting bug bite. I went the supply closet and got an alcohol cleansing wipe to help cool it off. It worked great but I was then fired for theft for using what costs less than a tenth of a cent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 113

Settler mindset

By Freebird - 14/04/2026 00:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, my sister and her common-law-husband intensified their hints that their family is growing (a teenage son, a pre-teen daughter, and a new baby coming in the way), and it's getting rather crowded. In short, they want me out of the house. They may have also forgotten the mere fact that it is my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 103

A visitor

By Anonymous - 24/03/2023 12:00 - Germany - Leer

Today, I had a walk-in: a tiny tick, crawling through my bathroom window, looking down at me in the shower, wondering whether I might be tasty. The window was closed, by the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 115

Countdown

By Anonymous - 26/05/2023 18:00 - Australia

Today, I took my regular shit, like clockwork. Same time, every single day. Unfortunately, that time is midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 144

No way

By SingleSoon - 08/01/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I moved my kids and myself into my parents' house. My soon to be ex-husband keeps calling me from different numbers, crying for me to take him back. The sorry bastard kissed his best friend instead of me at midnight on New Year's Day because I was attending to my son who was afraid of fireworks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 366

Magic System?

By Anonymous - 13/02/2023 10:00 - India - Vadodara

Today, I'm trying to study for my finals, but some local school is having an event nearby, and has decided to make life hell by playing "Magic In The Air" at full volume while some woman screams into a mic. I'm dying. The entire neighbourhood can hear their damn sports day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 123

Check yourself

By Anonymous - 18/03/2021 22:58 - United States - Bothell

Today, the dorm above me had their toilet pipe break and leak through my ceiling, so I have to move rooms. The worst part was I answered the door to let the repairman in while I was in pajamas, but he looked uncomfortable. I didn't notice until he left that my 'thing' was poking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 484

Sorry

By Anonymous - 10/06/2021 00:01

Today, I vented a lot to my niece about serious things via text message but I didn't reply to hers since I was asleep. She assumed I'd killed myself and called everyone I know, and had a full blown panic attack. And she has asthma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 473

No kidding

By Anonymous - 23/02/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I told my mom that having watched my sister ruin her life having kids who grew into brats with criminal records before their teens, I refused to ruin my life the same way and will be childless. I then turned to leave and they were in the doorway, my sister and her two brats. I got slapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 414

The most British FML

By Anonymous - 30/04/2023 22:00

Today, a traffic plod with nothing better to do gave me a ticket for my back bumper being a few inches over the start of some double yellow lines. He took photos, with a ruler and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 300

Vengeance is mine

By Anonymous - 22/11/2023 00:01

Today, I wouldn’t let my sister borrow my car, so she told our parents that I’m depressed and threatened to kill myself, which is a lie. My mom is on the phone to 999 trying to get me a 72-hour psychiatric hold in hospital, and every time I say it was a lie, my dad says I’m in typical denial. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 109

Thanks, I hate it

By Clara - 23/09/2023 22:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, for my birthday, I got a beautiful bouquet of flowers, a lovingly hand-decorated candle, and my first positive Covid test ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 665

You deserved it 123

By 832v - 15/03/2015 14:00 - Japan

Today, on holiday in Japan, I got confused and booked a room in a Love Hotel. I’m single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 665

You deserved it 96

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Family Love Poopoo peepee Awkward Money Annoying Raining Work Painful Health Medication Miscellaneous Relationship advice Relatable AITA Psychology Mental health Cats Animals Allergies Cheating Kids Drunk Embarrassing Weddings Singing Sports Furniture Airplanes Transportation

The Top

Today, as I was laying on the bottom part of my bunk bed, I noticed a beam on the underside of the top bunk that seemed to have no place being there, so I tried to find out what it was. I soon discovered it was to support the bed after it promptly collapsed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 653

You deserved it 15 390

Today, my one-year-old son threw up on the man sitting next to us on a plane. I felt bad and apologized profusely. When I tried to give him money for dry cleaning, he slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 922

You deserved it 3 652

Today, I had to visit a client because his printer had broken down. After driving for an hour, then being screamed at about how horrible my company's service is, I walked over to his printer and found the problem: there was no paper loaded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 427

You deserved it 3 132

Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 600

You deserved it 3 785

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 258

You deserved it 6 084

Today, my son has complex special needs, but apparently some of my deliberately ignorant relatives put no effort into learning more about his issues, and just call him "the retarded one" when they think I can’t hear them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 277

You deserved it 188