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Today, I took a poop that was three states of matter. Solid, liquid, and gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17580) - you deserved it (5511)
On 12/13/2011 at 10:45pm - health - by brownunderwear - United States (Washington)
Today, I ran into an old friend, and she remarked how she couldn't believe we hadn't seen each other in a year. Except not only did I attend her baby shower a few weeks ago, I spent hundreds of dollars on a unique gift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17578) - you deserved it (1620)
On 11/22/2012 at 9:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I lied to my diary about my weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17577) - you deserved it (34915)
On 04/26/2011 at 9:56am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I found out my roommate thinks the sink is an appropriate place to wash his junk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17576) - you deserved it (1672)
On 08/29/2011 at 11:56pm - misc - by SinkyBalls - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I fell into a hole. And by hole, I mean a sewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17575) - you deserved it (1777)
On 05/16/2012 at 6:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I lost my watch at the pool. After giving a detailed description of it at the desk, I was really happy to hear someone had found it and handed it in. Too bad I was too late, because someone had already claimed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17574) - you deserved it (1513)
On 09/30/2011 at 7:10am - misc - by happymum - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, while waiting on the platform, a blind man asked out loud for some help getting into the subway car. I helped him through the doors and into a seat. I decided to sit down as well. Twenty minutes later, I realized I was on the wrong subway line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17573) - you deserved it (4500)
On 09/24/2010 at 1:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17572) - you deserved it (941)
On 08/30/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was robbed of five bucks by a vending machine that said "Enjoy Life!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17570) - you deserved it (2410)
On 09/27/2010 at 9:09am - misc - by lovelife - United States
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be hilarious if she pulled a prank on me, so she did the classic "bucket of water on a door" one. I ended up getting stitches and a concussion on my birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17570) - you deserved it (1089)
On 07/30/2012 at 2:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I punched the air enthusiastically after getting an impossible question right. Unfortunately, above me was an old fashioned mole trap, with 6 small spikes and 2 large ones. I now have 6 puncture wounds in my hand, and two in my shoulder, as it fell off the hook it was hanging on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17567) - you deserved it (5157)
On 08/22/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I had to stifle a fart so my upstairs neighbors wouldn't hear it. I know this because I frequently hear theirs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17567) - you deserved it (1778)
On 09/12/2011 at 1:30am - misc - by silent one - United States
Today, I spent hours baking an apple pie to impress my future mother-in-law. I was especially proud of the fact I'd made the crust and filling myself. When I served it to her, she picked off the crust and, between mouthfuls, bitched that it was nothing like canned pie filling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17568) - you deserved it (1121)
On 04/20/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by ohgodwhy (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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