Today, I asked a traffic cop if it was okay to park my car briefly in a 'Monday to Friday only' parking spot, since it's Saturday. She politely replied I could. I came back less than ten minutes later, only to find a parking ticket stuck to my windshield. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He told me one of my lights was busted, and I couldn't help but point out that one of his was out too. He said, "Thanks, I'll get that fixed right away." then gave me a ticket. FML
Today, I was pulled over for speeding and was shocked that the cop asked me out. Before I could respond, he noticed my wedding ring, said "Nevermind" and then gave me a ticket. FML
Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML
Today, I received the $30 parking pass that I ordered over 4 weeks ago. My class is only 4 weeks long, and next week is the last week. FML
Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML
Today, my boss entrusted me with his car to run an errand, as I usually take the bus. I managed to get there and back safely before someone slammed into me while I was re-entering the lot, causing major damage. It was his wife, who thought I was a car thief. FML
Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML
Today, my car broke down. My colleague came to get me and then, later, my husband picked me up from work. We went to collect my abandoned car, but it was gone. It took 10 minutes of me panicking and thinking it had been stolen before he crumpled in laughter and told me he'd already collected it. FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over something that popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML
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Top comments
waffule365 16
She said you could park there not that she wouldn't give you a ticket.
BeMyLove15 10
That was a dare.
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Comments (144)
waffule365 16
She said you could park there not that she wouldn't give you a ticket.
xcalabrese3x 6
Op should've made themselves more clearer lol
ptoka 20
Haha, to the cop the OP was just another easy ticket sucker
nnnope 26
25 - aside from that grammatical nightmare as a whole, I'm pretty sure OP is one person
TheAbstract 15
More clearer? Come on now.
meggy590 6
"Themselves" can be applied to one person. Just saying... Before you try to correct anyone else.
ptoka 20
64, I think 62 hit the real issue right on the head
nnnope 26
64 - no, it can't.
crazytwinsmom 25
Yes it can be used in place of himself or herself.
DocBastard 38
In colloquial speech, "they" has become an acceptable alternative to the much-more-cumbersome "he or she". In formal writing, however, it's still considered incorrect.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
Themselves is the reflexive pronoun for they. They is specifically for more than one person. They should NEVER refer to more than one person, so one should always use "himself or herself" regarding one person if the writer does not know the gender of the person he or she is speaking of.
twitch851 9
Just like in most Languages, you alway default to the masculine version.
sanchogrim 18
56-It's ok though! She has "swag".
shyeahh_fml 19
64 - May I hear an example sentence? I'm not trying to argue this, I just can't imagine when "themselves" would be used to talk about a single person.
zombieslayer83 19
Wow, for real? Nobody here is even talking about what was said. Go to class if you want to talk about spelling or the proper use of words. I'm not here for a grade! I'm here to get a laugh.
crazytwinsmom 25
84- 'No one who ignores the law can call themselves a good citizen.' From dictionary.com
dancinwookie 21
#88- That is exactly what I have been trying to tell everyone in my last couple of comments. I got down voted, but I know how you feel; I have to think all day long and now when it comes to "derp/down" time I need a thesaurus and a dictionary! Not what I call relaxing, but I chose to comment so....
jsandy1994 10
Who cares?
ashhfrgvbdgovss 6
Who cares?
ashhfrgvbdgovss 6
^ Referring to #62
sens3sfailing 24
look at the thumbs. if people didnt care, they would be either down voted or left alone. just because you don't xare doesnt mean that other do not. respect that, and don't ridicule others for caring about different things than you. im not a grammar nazi, but I see no harm in there being any. the damage they are doing is what? educating you on how to speak/write in a more proper way? oh no! god forbid you just ******* ignore it!
crazytwinsmom 25
I'm here just for laughs too and not a grammar nazi but will defend someone against the grammar nazis if need be. Fml rules state 'proper' grammar but not 'forrmal'.
BrookRae 19
No, the cop should've made herself plain.
dancinwookie 21
#129- I, personally, have a brain tumor. Sometimes I mess up, so I wouldn't hold it against anybody else if they did too. That's hypocrisy. I've actually grown tired of constantly being judged here and am looking at closing my account.
legendxs 20
Totally agree with #1! YDI for that you didn't ask the officer the correct question.
BeMyLove15 10
That was a dare.
RAUHWeltBegriff 9
That bitch!
Norja 33
That's like asking a thief to watch your purse for a couple minutes.
QDonahue16 9
People sometimes. I hate when people do stuff like that.
Mr_Satan 11
Even if it was the same cop, it was a stupid question to begin with. Why ask a cop if its okay to break the law? That said, most cops that I have met are hypocritical shitheads who think a badge makes them better than others....
VannahJane 17
Those tricky cops
jisaac09 25
OP should be equally tricky and argue that the sign didn't mention any specific monday or friday. Everyday is technically monday-friday if you just use the friday from next week.
magoogle225 4
I laughed so hard at this comment. I don't even know what you're trying to say. Every day is not Monday-Friday, what about Saturday and Sunday?. Saturday is not even close to the same thing as Monday-Friday. Saturday comes after Friday, before Monday (and Sunday). Even if you use the Friday from next week, the Saturday from the previous week still does not fall in that range. Next Monday would though. I think you need to learn the days of the week again.
Mr_Satan 11
91.... seriously? it makes me sad knowing that was over your head... no matter what day someone reads this, there was a monday at some point before it, and there will be a friday at some point afterwards.... and fyi, I'm posting this on a saturday...
SeepingSarcasm 7
Wow #91....how did you not understand that? Nevermind learning the days of the week, you urgently need to learn how to use logic thinking.
jisaac09 25
@91- M-T-W-T-F-S-S-M-T-W-T-F Notice how I listed everyday of the week. It is proceeded by a monday and followed by a friday.
KingCeltic77 18
Unfortunately, some cops, not all, like to abuse their powers and bully people. Looks like you got one of those cops. FYL.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
...OP wasn't SUPPOSED to park there... I think it was another cop that didn't know OP had permission that gave him the ticket, not the same one... If it WAS the same cop, well, she just likes trolling.
KingCeltic77 18
That's what I'm saying. She might've gotten one of those troll cops. Granted, OP shouldn't have tried to park there, but it sucks that OP got a ticket.
Michael_92 20
I expected a comment from Red to go more like "I would've find that cop and shove my foot so far up their ass they couldn't walk for more than a week!"
KingCeltic77 18
The cops in my town are dumbasses. They were about to give Kelso a job at the station. That's the quality of cops from my town.
countryrose92 23
I believe he specifically said "some cops, not all" and I believe he is right that there are a few people in law in forcemeat that abuse their power such as *if* this cop had given op permission then ticketed him, or those cops that turn their lights on just to get through a light or go fast on the highway and not for an actual emergency. Whenever there is a position of power. There is usually someone that takes the opportunity to abuse said power in someway.
Lilo4life 26
Or sometimes cops do their job and we bitch about it.
KingCeltic77 18
Tell me to STFU again my foot is gonna put up with shit from your ass on a regular basis.
imvee5599 7
OP,just because you asked her and it was okay with her doesn't mean other officers knew about it.
iLike2Teabag 27
But it's still Saturday and legal to park there though.
TurkeySlab 9
She said that you COULD park there not that she wouldn't give you a ticket
The_Big_Boss 20
Did you seriously just copy the first comment exactly except for capitalizing the word "could"?
enormouselephant 15
Did you seriously just copy the first comment except for capitalizing the word, 'COULD'?
MrThumbsItUpMan 8
Did you honestly copy the first and beginning comment but you only capitalized could
countryrose92 23
He also left out the comma at the end. :)
waffule365 16
This sounds very similar to comment that was already posted.
mbpoland 5
Ticket for lack of common sense.
Aloyese 11
At least it wasn't a boot.
maxwells_hammer 5
I read this in a Canadian accent.