Today, I had horrible pains in my stomache area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23337) - you totally deserved it (35701)
On 04/14/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by blehh (man) - United States
Headache, heartburn, indigestion, stomachache diarrhea! There's gotta be some pepto around your house, you didn't try that?
#5 - On 04/14/2009 at 7:54pm by I_Hate_Cars
The doctors should have asked pretty early on when was your last bowel movement. Sucky :(
#7 - On 04/14/2009 at 7:57pm by kitkatkelly
spell it right...its stomach..dumb bitch...haha and that is an FML
#11 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:04pm by roflcopter1
GUYS I STUBBED MY TOE. IT HURT SO I WENT TO THE DOCTOR. TURNS OUT IT WAS NOTHING, LOL.
#12 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:05pm by UrLifeDoesntSuck
Meh, you could sit in a waiting room at a Canadian hospital for a day and get told that for free.. Although I suppose 400 bucks is quite the price to pay just to take a crap. I hope you had coverage or you're shit out of luck..
#15 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:06pm by raabhimself
that happened to my cat recently, haha. $500 in total for running around all day because it kept throwing up. It's better though.
Man I love it when people say "First" and they arent the first....comedy.
Anyways Im a little surprised you didnt realize you were constipated, might want to get a bit more in tune with your body so you dont waste your money and everyone's time. Although the first doctor shouldve figured it out pretty quick without having to send you to the hospital, Id get a new doctor.
haha that should've been the first thing you tried.
and fail @ #3
#22 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:18pm by that_guy321
wow that happened to my friend and her dog she paid $450 to find of her tiny dog was full of shit.
#23 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:18pm by 22
Well, I'm going to hope that the doctors helped you by giving you a medication.
It's a little hard to take a shit when you're constipated.
#24 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:22pm by blondiebeast
I'm a medical student and one of my profs told us that a surprising number of people go to the ER in a panic for what turns out to be gas.
That's happened to me before. I had bad abdominal cramps, called my doctor, she was like "OMG IT'S YOUR OVARIES CALL THE AMBULANCE" so I did, and it was the same thing. It can get pretty bad, and abdominal pain can kill you in 30 min. You did the right thing by going to the ER.
#28 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:26pm by spunky_butt
lol this exact same thing happened to my friend's husband. hehe! At least it was nothing serious!
#30 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:29pm by heatherewf
The exact same thing happened to me about 6 months ago. I know, it sounds like a completely stupid thing to go to the doctor for constipation, let alone the emergency room as I did in my case. However, it was the worst abdominal pain I had ever felt in my life. Quite probably the worst pain I had ever felt period, and I have a pretty high pain threshold. I could barely even walk. Wouldn't you go to the ER if you thought perhaps your appendix or another organ had ruptured?
NO WAY THAT HAPPENED TO ME TOO! It was so embarrassing! I don't blame you though, the pain is pretty horrible.
#32 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:31pm by theannoyingone
#8: the pain is literally excruciating and unless you've been constipated before, you would have no clue what to do. when i had it, I couldn't even move.
#33 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:33pm by theannoyingone
The opposite happened to me once, I had horrible abdominal pains and the doctor said it was just constipation. Turns out it was appendicitis and it was about to rupture by the time they finally figured it out.
People, that is what laxatives were made for.
seriously shove it up your ass and wait and then have two rolls of toilet paper on hand.
#3, did you realize you weren't first and just wanted to be funny or did you do that on purpose.
Bwahaha. =]
#36 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:40pm by ohhhhshizzz
And you're positive that's what's wrong? I went to the hospital for severe stomach/abdominal pains and they told me there was nothing wrong. The next day I went to my school nurse about it and she told me to go to a gastroenterologist. Turns out I have IBS-A. If you keep getting the pains go to a GI, you could have IBS-C. (You probably don't, but it's becoming more and more common.)
#37 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:47pm by xOpheliacx
dont be a pussy.
i refuse to go to the doctor unless i HAVE to. (HAVE meaning if i dont i will be fired, or cut from a team, such as a physical.)
and 21, stfu.
how does being in america have the slightest bit to do with being a constipated retard?
besides the fact that we don't have universal health care (yet) and he had to pay to be a retard.
#38 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:47pm by guitardedman
wow, I learned how to take a dump when I was 2 years old. How old are you and how have you not perfected it by now? It's just pooping.
#39 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:50pm by fatfaceunited
This tec. could be a good thing
Always better safe then sorry right?
Look at ^^ #37's, you never knowww
#41 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:53pm by LiveLoveLife
Way to overreact about minor pains.
This actually makes me a tiny (tiny tiny tiny) bit glad we don't have free healthcare in the US. Think of all the hypochondriacs!
#42 - On 04/14/2009 at 8:54pm by Ohnoitslindsay
Why my stomach hurts, the first thing I think to do is take a shit. I thought most people knew that.
Stomach pains can be real serious. Better to spend $400 to find out you're alright than to find out you have to spend more for serious medication/surgery.
Eat more whole wheat bread. :D
Oh jeez, I know exactly the cramps you're talking about! I've had them before, but fortunately (for me) I just ignored them.
Sucks for you though, so sorry!
#49 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:02pm by HyperFlirt
well YDI for living in America and having to deal with that health-care system.
Come live in Canada and you'd get that for free!
#51 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:09pm by ronnie8701
Would you have rathered it been cancer? Or something deadly? I'm sure a lot of people wished their stomach pains was just constipation.
WOW it never ceases to surprise how stupid some people are. if i get sick all of a sudden i google it before i see anyone o.O
#53 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:15pm by i_like_chicks
Eh I got this one beat. I went to the doctors because I thought I had appendicitis. I was having trouble standing and terrible pain in the area where my appendix was. I went to the doctor's office and got a pretty hot doctor. Needless to say she didn't really know what was wrong but was going to check if I was constipated or something along that nature. She stuck her finger up my ass and at the same time I farted. Talk about embarassing...
so yeah, I think I got your million dollar shit beat.
My comment was deleted! WTF
As I said before: Would you rather it been something more serious? I don't see how it's FML at all, and not really a YDI...
This is why you should live in a country where they don't make you pay to stay healthy.
As for the people saying he should have taken a crap, if he was constipated he wouldn't have been able too... he might just have assumed the the fact nothing was moving meant he didn't need to go rather than that he COULDN'T go.
#56 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:29pm by skiesofgreen
#44, it's not necessarily the OP's fault that they live in America, or wherever they could be posting from. You actually sound more or less like a prick, by saying its one countries fault for not having free health care. I think its great, but keep in mind people abuse it, and the tax payer suffers.. In some ways the american system works better, weeds out the annoying ones that bitch about every little sniffle, but its also bad because those who actually need help can't get it.. There's no win win.. But still Canada's free health care blows, and that comes from a fellow canadian
#57 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:30pm by raabhimself
Haha. I had the same thing happen to me. But they usually give you laxatives or something so that you're not constipated anymore. They tested the feces as well or something. Of course, I was only six years old at that time. I also don't think it was that expensive when they did it.
#58 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:30pm by curryndricegirll
#56 I agree our healthcare system generally speaking sucks (it does vary a little from province to province so I can't really speak for the country as a whole) but there are plenty of countries that are both free and efficient, not to mention I'd rather find some other way to regulate unnecessary hospital trips than leaving people in a situation where they can't get the treatment they desperately need... anyone want to move to Europe with me? preferably somewhere warm and sunny?
#59 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:41pm by skiesofgreen
yep, happened to me too. my parents payed my hospital bills for four years.
I also had a weird reaction to imodium though... haha.
#60 - On 04/14/2009 at 9:47pm by fortunecookie
You guys do realize that healthcare isn't free, right? Either you pay for it when you go to the doctor, or when you pay your taxes/insurance premiums. If people think it's free (or don't care so long as others foot the bill) then obviously some people will abuse the system.
Haha sorry i think these are the lyrics Icarasaly:
Nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea
Yeah, Pepto Bismol.
#64 - On 04/14/2009 at 10:08pm by I_Hate_Cars
For all the idiots saying you don't pay for health care up north... what's the tax rate in Canada?
#65 - On 04/14/2009 at 10:13pm by Edmund_Dantes
lol @ 12 because that's what we all do in canada
and agree with #63... health care isn't free... we just pay for it through our ridiculously high taxes...
#68 - On 04/14/2009 at 10:34pm by 123412341234
lol @ 12 because we all do that in canada...
and i agree with #60 - we just pay for our health care through our ridiculously high taxes...
but still - we end up paying less, generally, because all our rich people end up paying more :) yay! and we can go a hundred times for stupid things... like stubbed toes
#69 - On 04/14/2009 at 10:37pm by 123412341234
don't feel bad - same thing happened to a friend of mine this past weekend.
#70 - On 04/14/2009 at 11:20pm by phantomdonut
happened to a friend of mine. Unbearable stomach pains, ER ran every test in the book to the tune of $5000 (after insurance...) ... only to say it was just an ulcer and they couldn't really do anything for it in the ER...
Seriously why would you go to the doctor for that? I mean if it is ongoing like for days yeah, but for one day? That is just dumb. YDI
after doing the same thing repeatedly, mine turned out to be crohn's disease. you're not a hypochondriac or a stupid american. "you have your health, be thankful." -mr. bueller
#75 - On 04/14/2009 at 11:43pm by mkebrewers
Stop going to hospital/doctor for every little thing that is wrong with you. I never go to the doctor, and I'm alive. :)
P.S.
Don't blame America, blame the stupid people in America.
Not all of us are stupid.
#77 - On 04/15/2009 at 12:02am by nathaniel_
did you have achs in your stomache? lolol
i missed school once with terrible abdominal pain.. i was about 12, and some time in the middle of the afternoon, i ripped a huge fart--didn't even shit--and i felt perfectly fine. it was amazing. i probably proceeded to take a shit for good measure, but the fart was what made me feel like death.
Definitely FYL, when I was little this happened for about two weeks. Yeah, fucking two weeks. I believe you.
#81 - On 04/15/2009 at 12:42am by XenonScreams
this so happened to me before too. they thought my appendix had burst which sent me to the emergency room. i know how you feel.
#84 - On 04/15/2009 at 1:16am by redwingscupquest
I have had that happen to me when I was 12 and my parents thought I was faking, but after a trip to the hospital they told us the same thing. Through out my life I have had that happen a few times, mostly due to gas really, I make sure I have gas x and when I start feeling those painful burst, I take some and in 20 mintues Im good!
if you read these...hope this helps!
#84, same here. Only reason I didn't go was because I was too stubborn to think anything that bad would just start up out of nowhere, so I took a nap for two hours and then woke up and realized I just needed to take a shit.
aha
tht sucks
did you ever once think
"i feel like i gotta shit maybe i should try"
#88 - On 04/15/2009 at 1:42am by XxxrachelxxX
@57 in my experience americans enjoy going on about how great their country is and have no issue handing out crap to others for not living there.
@31 organs dont just randomly rupture, there needs to be a cause. if it was through something like poor health then the only organs im aware of that would simply die asymptomatically would be the kidneys or pancreas. even then, it would require long term neglect to do it.
OP: you should really be able to recall the last time youd been to the toilet and worked it out for yourself. even if you couldnt, the pain would probably be in your large intestine, and similar to the location of a hernia. must have been pretty bad to not work it out...what had you been doing that week...
#89 - On 04/15/2009 at 1:50am by organisedchaos
You must be a guy because if it was just constipation cramps it can't have been THAT bad and women have a much higher pain tolerance than that.
#90 - On 04/15/2009 at 2:13am by nuga
So one time my roommate woke me up in the middle of the night to get me to take her to the ER because she "was dying". She paid $800 *AND* wasted my good dreams, to have the doctors inform her that she was experiencing menstrual cramps and should probably invest in some midol. F MY life on that one.
Haha! Same thing happened to me a couple years ago. I woke up with HORRIBLE pains in my lower stomach, woke my mother up at 5 AM, she thought it was appendicitis, went to the ER... turns out I was just constipated as well.
These pains aren't ordinary cramps. It felt like my intestines were sliced with a knife. I could barely walk.
Happened again last week. I figured it was constipation... it was gas... Didn't go to the hospital that time.
a similar situation happened to my mom...she was in unbearable pain and they told her she was constipated and gave her a laxative. she went to another hospital and found out she had an ovarian cyst. so...if the pain doesn't go away, seek (better) help!
#93 - On 04/15/2009 at 3:58am by curious2090
#10 Or in any other country that has universal healthcare...for example, every single other developed nation except South Africa.
#15 I'm in the UK, and I've never waited longer than an hour in a hospital waiting room (and that hour was for a cut forehead and I was just there to get it glued - too small for stitches). All that stuff about universal healthcare causing dangerously-long waiting times is just propaganda put out by people who have a vested interest in keeping you paying a fortune for your crappy healthcare.
The UK is one of the unhealthiest countries in Europe, but we still pay less for our healthcare than the USA, and we're still healthier than the USA.
I pay 7% of my income to the tax that pays for our healthcare; National Insurance. It ALSO pays for my state pension and for any unemployment benefit (welfare) I may need. 7% pays for all that.
How much do Americans pay for fully-comprehensive health insurance? I bet it's more than 7%, and they don't get a pension and welfare out of it either.
#42 Universal healthcare REDUCES the waste caused by hypochondriacs; under the current US system, a doctor has a financial incentive to waste his time on the hypochondriac, because he'll get paid for it.
In the UK, doctors get paid based on the health of the people on their books; the sicker their clients, the less they get paid, so they've got an incentive to tell the hypochondriac to stop being stupid and go home.
Then they can move on and see the legitimate patients sooner.
Isnt that the first thing most people do when they have stomach pains; try to take a shit? I certainly do.
your fault: that's what you get for over exageratting
#100 - On 04/15/2009 at 8:10am by RNorthlandLGB
You didn't try that first? That would be the first thing I would think if my stomach hurt "when was the last time I had a significant bowel movement?" Well... maybe not like that... but it would cross my mind...
I don't understand why it's a YDI. I've been to the doc before because of horrible pains in my abdomen. It ended up being gas. I guess that's pretty ridiculous sounding, but it fricking hurt.
#38 - haha you STFU. I didn't say being in america has to do with constipation. I was referring to your health care system. you obviously realized that, so your comment was worthless. dude had to pay to be a retard but you are one for free!
...so yeah. Since when is constipation just "needing to take a shit"? You had a medical condition. You paid through the nose to resolve it because our health care system is broken. If you want to post an FML about how much health care costs, go for it, but this one is just kind of silly.
It is possible to retain stool in the bowel a.k.a. "constipation" even if you have recently gone to the bathroom.... severe abdominal pain can also be caused by stool and gas to the point of making you double over and therefore if you dont know whats causing it, should go to the ER......
Those of you calling him a pussy obviously havent had the experience of feeling that pain...
I still say YDI... one of the biggest problems in this country (USA anyway) is everybody is a hypochondriac, most are on tons of meds for things they don't really need to be taking anything for (still living a sedentary lifestyle eating crap foods) and people think doctors know everything and blah blah BLAH.
LMAO I had the SAME EXACT thing happen to me the other week!
I went to the nurse, was wound up being sent home and before I got home, I took a dunce.
All my problems were cleared after that dunce.
#108 - On 04/15/2009 at 11:55am by Imnotlinda432
Eh, it's kinda worth it in the end. The 400 sucks but I got constipated for two weeks and the doctors did nothing. Since then i've had to take medicine to fix it and now i have a fucked up stomach. It's less fucked up but i still have to take fiber, too.
#109 - On 04/15/2009 at 1:21pm by blackcatbook
That is why, even if I'm rolling around on the floor in agony and can't get up because of the pain, I wait it out before going to the doctors. If it's better in a few hours and doesn't come back, it probably wasn't important.
#111 - On 04/15/2009 at 2:36pm by theshewolf
"Horrible" pains from constipation? How long had it been? Seems unlikely; you should get a second opinion...from a lawyer.
#112 - On 04/15/2009 at 2:47pm by CrazedLeper
Would you prefer to have spent $400 to find out you have incurable cancer?
#113 - On 04/15/2009 at 3:10pm by Juan_Inukshuk
wow, this has happened to me before. i spent the whole night in the hospital and puked all over the x-ray technician, and had iv's stuck up my arms all for them to tell me i was constipated. it was embarrassing
#116 - On 04/15/2009 at 3:42pm by lindy21625
Your fault for being a pussy. You should've though..."I haven't shit in a few days, maybe I should try that!"
#119 - On 04/15/2009 at 4:47pm by iEnjoy3_14
@ #15 the avrg waiting time in canada is 1 hours to 1 and 1/2 hours sooo wtf are you talking about if you spread out health cars costs it liek 10 000$ per person per year on avrage and in canada its liek 5000$ soo
canada ftw lol
on another note i always wait 1 night b for going in to the doctors although they say constipation is one of the worst pains you can feel i ALWAYS try to take a shit first lol ydi lmao
#118 - nothing i've said is different than anything any non american has said... hypochondriac + privatized health care = more money for doctors for no good reason
at least you didn't get sent home with the diagnosis of constipation causing pressure on nerves, then to end up back in the ER two days later only to find out the idiot night time nurses completely missed a huge fuckin hematoma and partial dislocation; the REAL cause of the excruciating pain.
THIS HAPPENED TO ME
and to all the people who said "wouldnt you know if you were" no you wouldnt sometimes because its a shooting pain right by your appendix...so at first you are like HOLY CRAP MY APPENDIX. it didn't happen to you, so dont judge
#125 - On 04/15/2009 at 9:53pm by plasticxstarsx
@89 - Ever heard of appendicitis? When your appendix, an ORGAN, becomes inflamed and often RUPTURES very quickly, preceded and accompanied by horrific abdominal pain? Holy sh*t, stop the presses.
@37 - I too went to the hospital and was told it was *just* constipation. Here I am quite a while later after continuing to experience these and other symptoms and I only just got around to going to GI doctor. He felt it was likely either Crohn's, Celiac Sprue (a gluten intolerance), or Irritable Bowel Syndrome - all serious conditions I should not have put off diagnosing as long as I did - at the root of my digestive problems. It wound up being IBS coupled with a bacteria imbalance and a hernia. Whee!
So, all of you other folks with similar experiences, if you continue to have these problems, please go see a specialist for the sake of your health and well-being.
the exact same thing happened to me. i thought i broke my back, cause the pains were sharp. it seems like its ur fault but u cant tell
#128 - On 04/15/2009 at 11:48pm by tismylife09
everyone needs to back off.
this exact same thing happened to me except on christmas.. i thought there was something seriously wrong with my stomach and had to have xrays and cat scans.. i was there from 9 in the morning to 10 at night. It sucked and im so sorry that you had to go through that. The doctors at the er never asked me about my bowel movements so it was the docs fault.. not yours.
to all the haters shut the f up
#129 - On 04/16/2009 at 12:04am by soccer92393
Your doctor palpated your stomach and couldn't diagnose that you had crap backed up in you? That's pretty sad... I'd find a new one. Plus if he did palpate your stomach you'd feel as if you had to take a huge dump!
#131 - On 04/16/2009 at 1:34am by arashixarashi
to those saying its just a little bit of pain, have obviously never had a case of constipation along with gas movements. happened to me maybe 2 months ago, in mid shit it suddenly feels like my insides were tearing, I went into some intense sweating and actually passed out for somewhere around 10 minutes before i came to. pains followed me for the rest of the day, randomly causing me to fall out in a similar fashion to the toilet incident until i managed to drop that bomb, which was followed by diarrhea...........
yeah, i hope this kind of pain on those who dismiss this as hypochondria, even though i wouldnt wish that kind of pain on anyone not threatening my life.
i've had severe chronic idiopathic constipation for 13 years.
Deal.
and #132 try having your insides actually tear and have bloody shit. fun stuff
#133 - On 04/16/2009 at 2:51am by jweezy26822
not to mention its comorbidity with reocurring IBS, fecal impaction and encopresis.
#134 - On 04/16/2009 at 2:59am by jweezy26822
I had that happen to me in the 4th grade. It hurt like a MF.
I did not feel like I had to go to the bathroom at all.
The doctor pulled out a little hard turd from my ass.
I felt fine right away.
yeah that happened to me once
they sent me home
turns out my appendix had burst
set up gangrene then i spent 5 days in the hospital
lost my lawsuit because in arkansas you have to have four doctors say that one screwed up, but they pay each other off
FML
@126 yeah, appendicitis isnt asymptomatic. there is a lot of pain involved PRIOR to rupture. this being my point, your organs dont just rupture randomly, theres no need to rush to an ER. you go to your doctor with appendicitis.
#138 - On 04/16/2009 at 7:26am by organisedchaos
Alot of crokked hospitals and doctors out there... they probably needed to get an easy way to pay for a $400 golf day
#139 - On 04/16/2009 at 2:09pm by Jack_Of_Spades
I agree with #42, why are we Americans such ridiculous hypochondriacs? I can't believe how many people go to the hospital when they just have the common cold.
Normally I'm on the side defending the OP getting flamed, but YDI for not being able to handle what was probably a few hours of abdominal pain that people get all the time when they're constipated. Unless maybe you had a relative die of some GI disease and you were freaked you had it too or something, but if you had a real reason you wouldn't have posted it on FML.
#144 - On 04/19/2009 at 3:47am by airplanefood
and I'm saying that because it was for less than a day - if it were persistent then you had every right to go see a doctor.
#145 - On 04/19/2009 at 3:52am by airplanefood
nah, fuck that, you did the right thing... last may i didn't go to the hospital for 5 days because i thought i was just constipated... turns out i had appendicitis, i lost 8 inches of my colon and i had spend a week in the hospital and missed 2 weeks of work
i agree with #146. you were lucky that was all it was it could have been something way worse, like an abdominal aortic aneurysm, you got lucky really but i still say or life is fucked for such a high bill get some health insurance, i mean seriously
might I reccommend a book?
It's called Everybody Poops.
It'll teach you everything you need to know about how to take a shit
#150 - On 05/06/2009 at 5:54pm by browneyedbeauty1
yea i hate that.
my parents make me pay tree fitty everytime i gotta take a dump.
and double that for a piss with it.
actually, u can b constipated and still pooping regularly.... trust me... the same thing happened to me..... drink more fluids, ull b ok
with all the technology out there you'd think you could troubleshoot your problems first. then if that doesn't help call a doctor you know. last resort go to the hospital.
that's why it's shit that americans have to pay for healthcare! if i got that it would be free.
#155 - On 07/26/2009 at 3:30am by screamapillar
Generally people wait a day to see if that sort of stuff goes away, unless it's bad enough that you literally can't move or something, then it'll probably be ok : / that does suck thiugh
