Today, my girlfriend told me that she had an ultrasound tomorrow morning. With a confused look on my face, she said to me "don't worry, it's not yours." FML
I agree, your life sucks (70810) - you totally deserved it (2328)
On 04/08/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by Crazy09 - United States (Michigan)
Maybe she's a surrogate mother and forgot to tell you?
#1 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:13pm by adelaide_evening
ha.
haha.
that sucks but i suppose you can't have a silver lining without a cloud, now can you?
#7 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:20pm by Lauriebug
Typically you know you're pregnant for a while before you need an ultrasound, so she could have told you. Did she seriously just think you weren't going to notice?
#8 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:22pm by MiriamSingsLoud
I don't understand. That sounds like good news to me.
The FML would have been if it was your kid!
#10 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:22pm by kwbuzz23wk
How does she think that would make you feel BETTER??
and btw my friend had to get an ultrasound of her stomach when she was like 10.. she wasn't preggers though haha
#12 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:23pm by smiles1234456
I really hope you do not plan to stick around and help raise the bastard child.
Chances she does not know the fathers name :D
#3- It's NAHT AH TUMUHHH. HULAU
and all I can say is: wat.
#15 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:28pm by forthelulz
#3 and #4 are right, ultrasounds are not just used for pregnancies. I get about 3 a year for medical conditions and none of which have to do with baby making. Im guessing your girl is getting an ultrasound for something else and was just making a joke (if she was cheating on you she wouldnt know whos the father unless you two arent having sex). Sounds like a comment I would make to my man hehe.
Hahahaha.
For those of you who are saying it's an ultrasound for something else, why would she say, "It's not yours?"
Maybe she's fucking with you? If not, I'm so sorry. What a skank.
#4 is right, ultrasounds are used for a myriad of things other than pregnancies. I get about 3 or so a year for medical conditions, not baby making. My guess is your girl was making a joke (if she was cheating on you, she wouldnt know whos the father unless you two arent having sex). Sounds like a comment Id jokingly make to my man hehe.
#10 - No, I'm pretty sure that this is NOT a good thing.
First off, his girlfriend has been fucking another guy.
Second, she's pregnant with the other guys' baby?
That sounds pretty awful to me.
#19 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:32pm by seashell123
#17 It depends on how she said it...like I said, Ive made a joke like that to my man. But then again I said it jokingly so he knew right away. Maybe the OP just didnt pick up on the joke. Honestly delivering the news in that way saying nonchalantly that its not his just sounds too silly to not be a joke.
ack sorry for the double posting...fmylife freaked out on me and gave me an error saying the comment wasnt posted the first time.
Lol if she's being serious (and I genuinly think she isn't, I'd do the same in her place just for shits and giggles) then FYL indeed, ouch.
ouch. i hope she is kidding.
if not, dump her. you don't need to be in that situation.
lol for some reason her reaction reminded me of Juno.
#23 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:48pm by amykillswitch
At least you're not going to be burdened with any of that shit.
#26 - On 04/08/2009 at 8:56pm by Nakedsquirrel
At least she's your girlfriend and not your wife. Technically you hold no responsibility for the kid.
And I don't think she'll be your girlfriend for long now, will she?
im wondering if this is her sense of humour coming through, ... unless she said in jokingly, as many have mentioned above, i would pissed off. im hoping she tried to make a joke and you just missed it, or she didnt say whatever she wanted to say right? joking is fine when both parties are aware that its a joke. best of luck to you in this situation.
#32 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:08pm by angel_room
bad news is shes a cheating whore
good news at least it isnt yours!
#34 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:09pm by DanIsTheMan
I hope she was joking! I've had a lot of ultrasounds for my heart, maybe it's that and she was being a smart ass.
#35 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:13pm by tamoomoo
Get rid of her. What a bitch, she could have at least told you!
#41 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:43pm by Green12324
Dude... look at the bright side! Nine months ridin' bareback!
And free milkshakes for months after that!
#45 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:57pm by Paulspacefdot
She was probably making a joke...but shouldn't she have told you if she had some kind of medical condition that requires an ultrasound?
#47 - On 04/08/2009 at 9:58pm by hydronium
Ultrasounds are used for many other purposes other then pregnancy.
If she is pregnant - she's a skank for not telling you.
#51 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:09pm by 100308
Thank you #49, there's always an idiot who yells "Falcon Punch!" in every FML.
#52 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:19pm by Phillay632
Well it all depends how long he's been dating this girl. As said earlier, she's had to have known for a while if its time for the ultrasound (I think the first one's at 10 weeks). maybe it was from before the relationship had begun. But either way, she should have told you sooner dude
#54 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:29pm by bookphantom
lol great girlfriend....
but i agree it might be because of something else and she was just joking with you. For your sake i hope she was kidding.
#55 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:33pm by sleepingprincess
just make sure you don't beat up the father too badly- the kid deserves to have a daddy... :D
#56 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:43pm by balanceMMX
why would she say "it's not yours" if it wasn't for pregnancy
#58 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:57pm by Sagacious
My god, you're all stupid. It's called A JOKE. Get a fucking sense of humour people, seriously.
#59 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:59pm by DeeJayD
#51 I'm pretty sure she's a skank either way..... O.o
#60 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:00pm by interestingO_O
If this is her way of telling you she is pregnant with someone else's child then that's a tough break.
But there are other possibilities.
Maybe she's been having a few "plumbing" problems, and the docs have arranged an ultrasound to see what is going on - with the possible diagnosis that she might be pregnant or have had a miscarriage - and she was trying to tell you that *if* the ultrasound shows she is (or was) pregnant that it wasn't yours?
Did you try talking any more to find out, or did you just run straight to your room to feel sorry for yourself?
If on the other hand, the ultrasound is for something other than pregnancy, which is quite likely, then perhaps she was just trying to tell you: "it's not for a baby", and just used an unfortunate choice of words. Or perhaps she was trying to be funny; or was confused by your confused look - if the ultrasound was not for pregnancy, then it may never have occurred to her that someone else would jump to that conclusion.
If the ultrasound is for something else, and you have jumped to the wrong conclusion and not talked to her about it more, and are now sulking, posting to FML, and giving her a hard time, then perhaps she should be dumping you for being such an precious and untrusting git.
My god, it's called A JOKE. Get a sense of humour people, seriously.
#63 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:01pm by DeeJayD
#49 Thank you for you input, but you need not pull the male version of a Lorena Bobbit in the situation.
#51 I'm pretty sure she'd be a skank either way..... O.o
Dude, time for a new girlfriend. Either this one is a bitch or she has a horrible sense of humor. Run.
#65 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:05pm by interestingO_O
im preeeeeeetty sure she was joking, gosh - not an fmylife. people joke all the time, alright? and you can have ultrasounds for things other than just pregnancies, fyi!
I think she was TRYING to be funny...failed obviously or you wouldn't be here whining about it. Sounds like you don't know her well enough to be having sex with her at all if you're HERE questioning her fidelity to you or her overall virtue. If that's not why you posted this then you're just looking for sympathy by bashing her to strangers which is even worse!
I agree with everyone that said you have ultrasounds for a multitude of things and its most likely she was speaking of one of those. For her sake...I hope she's not pregnant with your child! She would be so buy changing a newborn's diapers and yours!
#67 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:24pm by onetuffbitch
#4 & 5 he said is girlfriend said 'don't worry it's not yours.' Doesn't that mean that in fact she had an ultrasound for that reason? Your dumb.
and dude...... you, FAIL! Look better or somethin.
^Yeah, but why would she have said "It's not yours"? Unless she was totally trying to screw with his head.
#70 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:36pm by Lovebug_Campbell
No girl should make that kind of joke. It's horrible, especially when it involves them cheating. That's just despicable and lame.
For your sake though, I hope it was just a joke.
#71 - On 04/08/2009 at 11:41pm by Morose_Princess
Ok, so the only way she can KNOW "it's not yours" is if:
A. They aren't doing it and she was going elsewhere to get her gap filled.
B. She was pregnant before they started dating.
This guy doesn't mention how long they have been together, so SHE MAY NOT HAVE BEEN CHEATING. That said, she still deserves a falcon punch.
Pro tip: Make all your new girlfriends pee on a stick before you start dating them.
My guess is his girlfriend was joking and he knows this but thought it would make a great fml.
#75 - On 04/09/2009 at 12:16am by nuga
#19, you're a moron. Ultrasounds are used for LOTS of things. I'm guessing the OP's gf saw his stupid look at not realizing this (like you!) and was being sarcastic.
Ouch.. hope for you she was joking... and that the kid is yours ... wahahahah.... its more like FHL
#77 - On 04/09/2009 at 12:34am by Mikeymikey
People need to make a judgement call on whether she was joking or is really pregnant. This one will always be divided because of that.
ok, i know ultrasounds can be used for a multitude of things, but don't you think his girlfriend would have said '' don't worry, im not pregnant" instead of " don't worry it's not yours" ?
Wow. What a bitch. Seriously, who does that? And on top of it all she makes it your problem basically because she tells you its not yours so that means that she wanted to involve you in the whole mess. I feel bad for you.
Some people on here are right. Yeah ultrasounds might not only be to detect if you're pregnant, but if the so-called-girlfriend clearly said "it's not yours" then? I say fuck her and move on... You don't want to support a child thats not yours do you?
#88 - On 04/09/2009 at 2:50am by lady4
#9: youre an asshole for saying "you should kick her in the stomach" you should go fuck yourself. dont bother by writing back saying "aw man its just a joke blah blah" youre not a woman therfore you will never experienece a miscarriage. One again, go fuck yourself.
#89 - On 04/09/2009 at 3:07am by spaceheater
dude she might have said that because she had to make an ultrasound anyways for any medical reason, and grabbed the chance to joke with it and see the dead rabbit look on your face.
i can perfectly see the joke in it, but that's just my optimistic side :D
#93 - On 04/09/2009 at 4:17am by humpty_dumpty
If she's pregnant, DUMP THAT WHORE.
But she could not be. I'm male/15, and I had an ultrasound of my tumour. Ya, males get ultrasounds too >: D
FYL though.
#94 - On 04/09/2009 at 5:36am by Curtieeeez
If she says "IT ISN'T YOURS" that probably means she not just getting an ultrasound for fucking kidney stones ..
#95 - On 04/09/2009 at 5:58am by youaresofucked
If you've been dating for quite a long time, then I'd suggest you get rid of that cunt as fast as you can. Better hope she was joking!
#95 She could have meant, jokingly, "The kidney stone wasn't fathered by you." You know, comedy. Speaking about one thing as if it is another.
She could also have meant it sarcastically - in response to his "confused look". Maybe she had been talking to him the the previous 5 minutes about her kidney stone, or fibroid, or whatever, and how much it was hurting. Then (possibly after some interruption) she says: "I'm getting an ultrasound tomorrow". BF makes the connection: "ultrasound -> pregnant" and looks confused. GF says sarcastically "Don't worry, it's not yours."
Thank you, #75, for having the sense to see the truth! Everyone else posting here is WHOOOAA crazy...
I don't believe the vast majority of these fmylifes -- I just see them as a fun thing to read. But I occasionally feel the need to comment anyway.
If this is true, and she is pregnant, and it isn't yours, RUN THE FUCK AWAY. I'm serious. If you hang around, then in most jurisdictions around the world these days, regardless of biology, you become the kid's primary caregiver, and should she leave you, she can take YOU for child support EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT YOUR KID. As long as you provided the kid's primary care when it was born.
So if she is pregnant, and it isn't yours, get out of there. Now.
I agree with #51,
BUT if she actually did cheat on you - DUMP HER IN A HEARTBEAT.
and rofl@falcon punch!
#107 - On 04/09/2009 at 4:51pm by planecrashdreams
DUDE!
DUMP HER IN A BLINK OF AN EYE.
Then she is going to say that it really is yours.
She might pin that baby!
LEAVE!
#108 - On 04/09/2009 at 5:05pm by Ekkelg
I hope it wasn't for a baby. I would go with her to her appointment to be sure.
#114 - On 04/10/2009 at 2:13am by bigcrazymike
She might have meant that the ultrasound wasn't yours...just a thought.
#115 - On 04/10/2009 at 6:12am by smoothjenkins
Unless she was joking with the "it's not yours" and the ultrasound was for something other than pregnancy (which would be pretty funny ) then this is fake, as usual...yawn.
its fucked up ill admit that..
but dude put yourself in her position;;
ya know?!.
having to tell you straight up like THAT.
its kinduh harsh.
but you just should be glad that its NOT yours.
then you woulda had some problems i guess.
but its hard for the both of you.
when she said "dont worry its not yours" doesnt that kinda mean its a pregnancy tho?
and ya dump her
Wow #124..
Anyway, at least that's one kid you won't have to pay for. Just look at it this way, the dude who got in her pants is now repeating the words FML to himself over and over, and over again.
A 15 second orgasm, and eighteen years of cash out of his pocket. Priceless.
#9
HARSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
although, she did imply that she was pregnant since she said "its not yours", which means it is someones child.
to those who are saying tat it's not a pregnancy: she says "don't worry, it's not yours." that proves it's a pregnancy dumbasses!
btw dump her. obviously she's a slut who doesn't care about you if she's willing to go get pregnant and not tell you.
lmao I would be happy if my gf was preg and it wasn't mine
#133 - On 03/03/2010 at 9:18am by vi3tv0tinh
