Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML
Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML
Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML
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Top comments
XHerobrineX 4
..... It couldn't have gotten any worse :)
ConnorBrown36 5
That would really piss me off
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Comments (114)
XHerobrineX 4
..... It couldn't have gotten any worse :)
iBanana 17
Oh, yes. It could have been far, far worse. ....Blue balls......
XHerobrineX 4
.....Touché
lonkite101 14
It could've been raining...
TheresNoMoreTp 4
He could have tripped and landed on the table with all the drinks on it. Than peed himself.
italiancows 8
It could have been WAY worst than that... Trust me on this one... (sigh...)
iLickRainbows 2
Damn 35 you beat me to it. I was going to suggest the shameful act of pissing oneself.
Truth_Nazi 0
Could've tripped and knocked himself out with the chair.
iBanana 17
Could've died aswell.
Jenna_Richards 4
Could have crapped himself too.
skoob1 12
He could have had to pee when he was babysitting...
kira_the_boss 1
He could have also shit himself
dadli_fml 9
The cops could have driven by mid-stream....
mariah_2014 0
Wow. Nice one.
Roevera 14
No need to be a douche..
1094568 1
Omg a snake...
Roevera 14
Yep, my ball python.
Amethyst888 14
61- No one really asked, but cool snake anyways! :)
ladyLALAA 29
Least OP wasn't busted peeing in a cup at someone else's house!
Roevera 14
Actually the only reason I mentioned what kind of snake was because someone say "Omg, it's a snake.." they deleted their comment and I look stupid.
mizuki123 8
Its ok it happens to the best of us. Sounds like something that would happen to my friend.
instnt1nfction 17
Right...friend, that's who..
guitarbeast 22
Does your friend happen to be named Cosmos Kramer?
mizuki123 8
Nope
mimi_animee 18
So you ended up peeing outside ? Couldn't you go back in to go to the bathroom ?
rocker_chick105 31
apparently OP's bladder had a different idea
nofearjenshere 12
Or maybe he was ashamed to go back in and look for a bathroom.
Bekll 31
34, that's how I took it.
twilightluver347 7
Idiot... Wow nice one :-/ outside? Most people would march back in proud... No not really lol
b0ngs 7
Hrmph....reading your comment made me lose a fee brain cells.
TheBonzaiGirl 0
I just hate when I lose a fee brain cells :/
zingline89 18
Why am I not surprised that your profile says Ke$ha and Snooki are your idols
1094568 1
5- you are probably one of those chicks who think they are hot... If you think that way you are 100% wrong you sound like a stuck up bitch... Sorry I don't know any other better way to put this.
Epsilonyx 15
....can't forget her username...
YacL 15
5 - Please don't speak again... or we're going to have a problem.
MysticKnight 3
55- why, you have a problem with him idolizing Ke$ha and Snookie, you clock face dumb shit.
YacL 15
75 - Him? Really?
MysticKnight 3
78- she*. And stop the **** for telling her not to speak again. She is a twilight lover, so she is cute.
DocBastard 40
MysticKnight - her* And "stop the ****"? What?? Your thinly-veiled attempts at flirting with twilightluver by attacking her attackers has revealed your true imbecilic nature. Well done.
lessthan0_fml 6
Don't trip(;
ConnorBrown36 5
That would really piss me off
MikeMikeTheAzn 3
Oh the irony... Wait, there's none.
FMLsAreAwesome 0
Then why even say anything?
MysticKnight 3
You don't say?
maniaccrab 0
The irony here is quite simple really, it's... *looks at commenter's picture* ...boobs... 0.0
igive 29
one is bigger than the other
Crystal55621 19
Seriously, people? Stop staring at the boobs!
iCake 13
Why should we?
MysticKnight 3
67- says the one who's pic shows man boobs
TheGewt 7
At least you didn't piss yourself.
lindora 35
But he did..
lindora 35
Oh nvm, I just understood the fml. My bad.
MrJustFriendz 5
Lol you still got to pee ;P