Embarrassing, Poopoo peepee, Clumsy and Miscellaneous: Keep it down

Keep it down

By Andy - 13/05/2012 02:21 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 474

You deserved it 4 368

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Same thing different taste

You OK in there?

By stinkypants - 10/11/2011 03:15 - India

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 783

You deserved it 11 857

By Pisspants - 17/09/2016 04:39 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 139

You deserved it 2 830

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 381

By Peepants - 03/03/2016 23:03 - United States - Huntsville

Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 053

You deserved it 4 716

By pissingcontest - 30/05/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 645

You deserved it 46 015

By sarahrachel - 15/12/2015 03:30 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 027

You deserved it 5 048

How smelly is your piss?

By Anonymous - 08/04/2021 21:00 - Finland

Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 140

By Blie - 04/09/2018 20:30

Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 4 172

By Anonymous - 11/07/2010 18:18 - United States

Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 730

You deserved it 5 469

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 013

You deserved it 2 788

XHerobrineX 4

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:31

..... It couldn't have gotten any worse :)

ConnorBrown36 5

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:33

That would really piss me off

Comments

HyperSquirrel 8

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:18

Lol at least people didn't give you a slow clap? =p

Jewnut 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:28

a little inconsiderate, you could have waited for the host to finish their speech. big boys can hold it.

SliceOfCake 9

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:00

I bet you wear Depends.

lialikesapplepie 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:28

Shame on you!

SliceOfCake 9

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:59

Yeah! Shame on OP for giving into urinary urges. Damn you, bladder!

trina101 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:42

Awe! Well, keep up your spirit! You will eventually forget about it and laugh it off

Snafuusmc 12

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:56

What would Billy Madison do?

maniaccrab 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:37

Yell at the camera?

RacistPancake 6

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:05

Am I the only one who can control my bladder?

IsThatAHorse 5

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:15

Wow that does suck OP but don't worry im sure people won't be talking about you. You'll be fine. But peeing in the bushes? What is this the 60s?!

hhhwat 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:37

Took the words put of my mouth

ICastillo 24

Sunday 13 May 2012 8:16

Your an ass man, just playing bro keep your head up it happens to the best of us.

1094568 1

Sunday 13 May 2012 8:25

Men: we are shameless annnnnnnd we are awesome..

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weird Shopping My ex Awkward Family Relatable Racism Love Kids AITA Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cute Cats Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Coworkers Alcohol Psychology Health Mental health Neighbours Cops Parents Scary Stressed out

The Top

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 339

You deserved it 7 901

Today, it's our ten-year anniversary, and I thought finally we would break our 10-month dry spell with some action. My husband had dozed off and was snoring even before I could reach the bed after finishing my chores. So much for happily ever after… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 487

You deserved it 330

The Top

Today, after spending 6 hours straight working on a project at school, I decided to call it a night. The instant I set foot out of the lab, the building started screaming. The maintenance guy had set the alarm without telling me. The police had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 998

You deserved it 252

Today, my family savagely mocked me to the point of tears, all for using "big", "fancy" words like "accommodations" and "hospitality". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 386

You deserved it 1 475

Today, my step-mom asked if I was having some eating issues. I admitted that maybe I've picked up some bad habits from friends and school. Now she won't stop bombarding me with self-help books and therapy websites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 670

You deserved it 23 251

Today, I was backing out of my snowy drive way on my way to work. I thought I hit a lump of snow. I'd run over my white cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 059

You deserved it 8 007

Today, after a year of staying at home, I finally went out. I had a panic attack and couldn't breathe, so my mum decided to scream at me and slap me so I'd become "normal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 090

You deserved it 239

Today, my wife and I finally had the house to ourselves as the kids are away. With all the buildup of a date night after the troubles we've been having, I thought this was the chance to get us back on track. She's asleep on the sofa at 8:30pm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 239

You deserved it 399