By cadillacfrank - 24/07/2011 21:01 - United States

Today, I was dared to eat durian. With my reputation hanging in the balance, I bought one. Only after I opened it did I realize the extent of the dare. It smelled and tasted like dried cat shit that Satan himself had regurgitated. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 816
You deserved it 36 562

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Sesh54 7

uhh......well worded and described I guess........

so you have a reputation of eating shit from the Bowels of Satan and you wanted to keep it? is this charlie sheens fml?

Comments

Sesh54 7

uhh......well worded and described I guess........

darkch0colate 0
NastyNinja31 0

i want to kno how do u kno way dry cat shut taste like

Finn_the_human 5

Well still got your pride right?

so you have a reputation of eating shit from the Bowels of Satan and you wanted to keep it? is this charlie sheens fml?

Poop in a fruit. Sounds like some kind of weird ****.

Good Rep: "You're the guy who ate that fruit that smells like cat shit!"

#59, I'd double check your sources on that. Durian is not illegal in the United States.

rein 8

Durian is actually considered a delicacy in Asia. I guess every nation has it's own weird food quirks, like snail eating in France & rattlesnake as a delicacy in Texas. Well, to each his own!

it isn't illegal. I had some in my geography class. the teacher gave us some to try.

Rattlesnake in Texas? I lived in Houston growing up and I never heard that one.

rallets 22
extrovertical 0

85 you must not get out much because they do have rattlesnake along with alligator to eat, and so on. they even had rattlesnake at wet'n'wild in Arizona!!

I will have you know that durian tastes really sweet. so maybe it feels like pudding surrounding a seed, and it DOES smell very strong, hence the ban placed on it on many transport systems across Asia, because some people HATE durian, op in case. I, on the other hand, LOVE it. And yeah, I'm Asian, so maybe I don't count, but I have many caucasian friends from Australia and London, who have me searching out good durian everytime they come down, because thy absolutely adore it!! maybe the one op tried tastes like crap, considering the fact that he's in US, and the fruit was probably really really old or sth, since durian is only grown in tropical countries, and hence, disgusting. heck, I wouldn't even eat durian that's more than 3 days old. but if you get really good durian, it is really sweet tasting- freaking good. but people either love it or hate it.

ImFrackinBored 13
witchdoctor1 9

well aside from snails in paris. they do frog legs

TheHoboWerewolf 0

Well I give 'em an A+ for the excellent wordage and a FAIL for knowing what Satanic cat shit tastes like! YDI

I thought durian was a pointy fruit in which your Chia could turn into on Neopets.

Why would you want a reputation of eating and smelling like cat shit??

They're illegal in public transportation in SE Asia because of their smell.

# 112 ur from Singapore thats why ur positive about it

The way I read it "Today, I was dared to eat cat shit made directly from satans hands. My reputation at eating animal feces was at stake. Until I opened it and I realized the cat ate chili. FML"

Escargot is delicious. Many restaurants serve it in Canada. Not only a French thing.

Well, I'm from Singapore and I do love durian but that doesn't mean everyone does. But ye like #112 said, there are people from countries other than ASIA who love durians too. P.S You should try Durian puffs instead xD

how'd you know what dried cat shit tasted like?

208- Canada is also predominately French. when I want there for vaca instead of the secondary Spanish I have grown accustomed to in the US it was French.

layybayy33 0

Canada is made of a lot of French heritage..

bnutts 4

I had some in Korea. Not bad it's kinda sweet.

I feel like there are a lot more young'uns on here than there use to be. It is not necessarily a bad thing so don't get offended people but does anyone else notice this?

That's true. It's still très magnifique though!

digibenho 0

222 check your sources... canada is more like US then france... imagine a cleaner and thiner US... and you get most of it.. but Quebec is a funny mix of france and that... and we may have SOME france heritage... its only in the quebec and its mostly gone... and frog legs are awesome... taste a bit like chicken wings.. and no we don't ride polar bears/live in igloos.

I think from your part, being Canadian , you should know our history and also know that we come MAINLY from french descendence. For sure before english ****** em over

when I went on vacation to srilanka my dad ate tons of this, the smell of our van was horrid. I threwup afterjust smelling it. :p

why would you say you don't ride polar bears...that'd be pretty bad ass

QwertyMcNugget 0

Best description in an FML ever.

I want to know how you type so well.

yuck! I couldn't bring myself to trying durian once it had been opened, the stench made me throw up it was so bad >.

Canada is predominately English, but yes- we have two official languages in our country (French being the second one).

broomhildo 19
The_Moustache 6

81, never seen someone eating rattlesnake in Texas...

becauseva a lot of canadians are french

222- Canada is predominately English. The only predominately French province is Quebec, although there are French speaking parts of other provinces.

I feel like I'm the only one that thinks it doesn't smell bad or taste bad $:

bigscarybunny95 0

That depends on the area you live in..

Durians are awesome ! they smell too good :)

dear #196, you're from Victoria, Canada, and I'm pretty sure your official language is English. so you really should learn to read. much love.

Now I'm not saying that no one has ever eaten rattlesnake in the history Texas, but I've lived in Texas my entire life and I've never heard of it being a delicacy nor do I know anyone who's eaten snake. and I know many old and young people in many different areas. hell, I'd say more seem to consider whataburger a delicacy. *wretch*

leela11 0

that's regurgitated cat shit... from the devil himself...

I've eaten rattlesnake before, and it's not a delicacy, believe me. It was disgusting. I've lived just north of Dallas all my life and only heard of one or two people who have eaten rattler.

yeah us texans also rode horses to school. I think we should have a duel at high noon in front of the saloon with this idiot

Uhm....English and French are both official languages of Canada. Yes the west is more predominantly English, while the mainland east is very French. But, a FYI, most people from FRANCE themselves do not like the type of people in French Quebec either..... So... I guess everyone, except for they themselves have a dislike for them. LOL.

He shat and came at the same time when he tasted it. You tell me.

annadorkable 0

322, you're not alone, i think so too, i like durian alot . maybe cause i'm asian and was fed it at a young age

omgcookeys 15

388, I had it when I was young too! and I'm also Asian. it's awesome sweet and I actually like the smell! but to people that think "oh she's Asian, they just like that kinda stuff" not all Asians like it, my sister HATES it.

AllThatHit 7

like what? if uhhh... uhhh... I can't think of anything worse

flockz 19

rebecca black and justin bieber's child? the simple thought of that makes my ears bleed.

xoxilovesoccerxo 0

Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber starring in the Twilight saga.

Of course it could have been worse #2. Usually things can always be worse.

80: the movie or the actual year? and I don't see why anyones mentioning Rebecca Black or Biebs. The OP is describing the smell, not sound

What if Rebecca Black and Justin Beibers child had genital herpes during the Holocaust? o.O

GuessWhatKids 13

2- It could have actually BEEN Satan's dried cat shit.

Hiroshima and Nagasaki, war, mid-east massacres, civil wars, America's quest for peace, terrorism, plague, aids, world hunger, child cruelty, animal cruelty, I could go on and on..

chocomilkshake 5

I actually ended up confused because I was wondering if I had accidentally moved on to the pages' comments

Clearly you've never stood close enough to either of them

I'm sorry that Satan himself just HAD to regurgitte it

aguin8 0

I'm sorry you look like you're 12

aguin8 0

I'm sorry you look like you're 12

Blackmail111 9

But you still continued eating it...Face palm

I believe its considered a delicacy in some circles; and like most delicacies, its something no sane person would ever eat.

Durian tastes freaking amazing, it just smells gross.

durian is actually the most amazingly delicious fruit but it's death for your nose. Once you get through 3 or 4 bites the smell isn't so bad and then it's just amazing to eat.

omgcookeys 15

it tastes freaking awesome. it doesn't smell too bad to me but I gotta say, I love it. when I was little, it was my favorite food! it is absolutely delicious!

sxe_beast 11

my ex (yes I'm going to bring up an ex again) would go crap like this often in the army. once in Iraq he ate a camel spider, another time a wasps nest :/. all because he "had to have his men respect him"

yeah, does anybody know? (well I suppose some one does due to these comments)

there is this ingenious website called google. I suggest you check it out

there is this ingenious website called google. I suggest you check it out

oh it's that horrible smelling fruit that apparently tastes lovely. I thought that was a duriola *facepalm*

NastyNinja31 0

thanks to those who actually answered my question :)

It's a huge fruit native to southeastern Asia that supposed to smell like hell and taste like heaven.

n_epic_fail 14

it's a nasty ass fruit found in eastern Asia (pretty sure) called stinky fruit by some. illegal on public transportation. shit is NASTY!!

a fruit with a putrid stench but once you get used to it, it will taste like vanilla ice-cream.

nikkon416 13
omgcookeys 15

an absolutely delicious fruit that I would eat anywhere, who cares about the stench? it's not horrible, it tastes VERY sweet and has a soft creamy texture if a durian is what I think it is. (a large fruit that's yellow inside and spiky on the outside)

A spiky fruit with the flavor of at least three cheesecakes, the luxuriously smooth consistency of fine hand-spun silk, and the spectacularly putrid smell of untold millions of rancid corpses rotting in the bowels of hell.

I love the shoes in your profile pic :-)

its this spiky green fruit that smells like shit and is banned in most hotels. it taste creamy, im from southeast asia but dont like it.

jamaymay92 0

it's a stinky fruit. smells awful and tastes awful. supposedly, if u cook it right, it turns edible

it's something that smells and taste like dried cat shit

guckylynn 19

220, a 14 year old should not have an iPod. just saying. and no one cares if you love an emotionally abusive fictional character that has no literary depth. go read a real freaking book.

guckylynn 19

dang... iPhone. but the rest still stands.

#12, don't be such a ******* douche and just help somebody out for once.

KiddNYC1O 20

Andrew Zimmern ate it in Bizarre Foods.

KiddNYC1O 20

...and even HE had a hard time trying to eat it and keep it down.

4 more importantly where can you buy one? do they even get sold in England?

frozenshake 5

63- yup, it's an acquired taste (I guess) it smells like rotting flesh and tastes kind of like a cross between banana and... apple. or mango xD I don't really remember cause I don't really like it, but my parents love it...

225- Age discrimination always makes people look mature. Good job.

omgcookeys 15

146, no, its like three times the size of a pineapple :) and the yellow inside looks softer like yellow mixed with white :)

omgcookeys 15

217, it can be eaten raw, it's edible without cooking it. you're allowed to eat it without cooking it. I survived. I was like younger than 7 when I first had it, without cooking it. it tastes awesome, don't judge purely on the smell. it actually tastes like ice cream if you freeze it!

but how did it taste? that's the real question

It's the most disgusting fruit thing known to man. It literally smells like a toilet that houses rotting bodies. However some people seem to love the stuff. Insane people.

All I see you commenting on is the smell. Have you ever actually TRIED the fruit, to know the reason why you would call people who eat it crazy?

sematariux 7

you look like you eat lots of it

I've eaten it. it's thick and sweet and smells funny (but just tastes thick and sweet). definitely not cat shit, but maybe not everyone's cup of tea. I personally don't even find the smell offensive, and I never had it as a kid. it's not my favorite fruit, it's ehhh on the same scale as grapes for me.

yeah it's strange I've had durian a few times and sometimes it taste like your lickin crap and sometimes it tastes good... O_o

RandomChickXD 0

I heard that it smells like shit but tastes like pudding

Time for a sportlife (if you guys have that in the States)

TheCalendarGirl 5

Dude, I ****** love grapes o;

a_nutritionist 10

pudding and apple actually. sounds to me like the op chickened out on eating it and based this opinion on the smell. what a pansy.

aguin8 0

one of the funniest things I've read.. made me lol

Lauren10102 3

**regurgitated even better... ;)

LolMoqz 10
lmaoatall 6

how about a little hitler puss cat shit? I think I have enough to go around! if not, I have some pussy tootsies in my box! consider it like almond rocha. mmmmmm

nickmeier1 4

what is durian?! and that's nasty....

Also known as jackfruit, it's a large southeast-Asian fruit that smells horrible but actually doesn't taste that bad.

it's a fruit that's smells gross, looks gross, and tastes pretty good!

longchow 8

it is definitely NOT jackfruit but looks similar to one on the outside but with much wider thorns and a soft yellow edible portion on the inside. it has a strong scent (I actually think it smells sweet, too sweet) and tastes good as well (if fresh and not frozen/old).

omgcookeys 15

I like to freeze it and eat it like ice cream. it's sweet enough to pass for a frozen treat!