ifhehadadickforaheaditdbefuckingsmall
Strovolos, Cyprus 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my husband was arrested for having sex in public. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
RBergman
Basin, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Caught in 4K
Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML
fuck
Hubert, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Caught
Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML
nickim756
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Smooth criminal
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML
Miss bad decisions
🌶️ Spicy
Straight to jail
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML
ken
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Thanks, I hate it
Today, I learned that my girlfriend is cheating on me when she was arrested for having sex in public. Not with me though. FML
iliketoastalot
United States
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
Fooled Wife
Today, my husband was arrested on 2 felony charges in a sting. We've been married 5.5 years, had almost enough money for a down payment on a house, were trying to get pregnant, and had a non-refundable trip to London planned. We are now broke and on the verge of divorce. FML
Why
Marlborough, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my husband cheated on me. In my house. While I was home. FML
Pissed
United States
Gotcha
Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML
Bonnie and Clyde
Humble, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Hello hello hello
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML
Top comments
erockinthesuburb 17
Something tells me that you weren't involved in the sex... Just a hunch.
HortonThelephant 15
Well don't go bail his dumb ass out. You'll need that money to hire your divorce lawyer.
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Comments (127)
TheWorldGreatest 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow that's epic
k_ninjaa 9
Look at the username: "If he had a dick for a head, it'd be f-ing small."
inthedopeshow 17
If by "epic" you mean cruel, heartbreaking, and disgusting, then yes, this is rather epic.
DocBastard 38
No, Beowulf is epic. The Odyssey is epic. Dvořák's New World Symphony is epic. This is mildly amusing and very sad, but it is most assuredly NOT epic.
rattusrattus 18
It could be the *inciting incident* in an epic. The OP, in response to the shattering of the status quo, will enage on a proper adventure with dragons and monsters and attractive bartenders, culminating in an awesome climax and a positive-ironic ending, for although they lost their husband, they discover the true meaning of friendship.
gc327072 30
That is deep
ironichalibut 24
23- You forgot orgies, no epic classical adventure is complete without an orgy.
PincessBoff 6
9- If your profile picture is your most recent Halloween costume then I automatically respect you. My boyfriend and I were the same thing for Halloween, but he was Finn and I was Jake!
noelasis94 18
I think he was thinking of that song epic you know the one that goes you want it all but you can't have it
dcheques 1
You realize this isn't a university English class, right?
HouseElf 13
93- no we learned that in high school. Beowulf and the Odyssey, that is.
corporatescoundr 25
Thank you #23! My next short story/novel is underway!
claudio117 12
Thinking with the wrong head
courtney680 17
Time fore a new husband..
J_C_maldonado 9
Indeed
erockinthesuburb 17
Something tells me that you weren't involved in the sex... Just a hunch.
RissaLea 8
Me and you both!
ironichalibut 24
3- The name of the OP was the tip off for me. Apparently he's stupid, a cheater, and has a tiny Peter.
TourettesGuyFTW 25
Unlike the other FML (the new father on facebook one), this one has no ambiguity.
Enslaved 36
The OP from that FB FML responded and explained. So sad.
FuKcMee 32
haha busted
Andrew910 5
Nope. The cops probably got to him first.
tmmundy 17
4...I see no humor in this FML whatsoever.
HortonThelephant 15
Well don't go bail his dumb ass out. You'll need that money to hire your divorce lawyer.
pheebs314 17
I'm not sure if you should be happy you weren't, or really upset...
Llamacod 11
I'm thinking "really upset" is the correct answer here
pheebs314 17
I would be a bit of both. Relieved I wasn't stupid enough to, but ******* pissed he was. Although that didn't come across right in the comment.
Dillyduzit 23
Yeah, I'd let his ass rot in jail and tell him I'm just doing him a favor. Leaving him in jail will give him the opportunity to become someone's girlfriend and be able to have all the sex he clearly wants :)
WrongRomance 11
He's not a very sneaky cheater.
alwayswinning123 7
Wow...that's just wrong on any level
80sgurl 15
One word...Divorce!
twinkiefeets 17
62--awe that's so sweet. Fml is the newest dating site!