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Man or woman?

Today, my girlfriend tried to wake me with a handjob. Because I'm a very light sleeper, I woke straight away and instinctively punched whoever was touching my dick. She forgave me, but I don't think her father ever will once he finds out. FML

#20125284
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13862) - you deserved it (3197)

On 10/20/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by nahalDZ - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

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Fuck... I wonder what you do to the alarm clock in the mornings.

#2 - On 10/20/2012 at 8:34pm by pennies_lane

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That's sure a handy way to wake you up

#3 - On 10/20/2012 at 8:34pm by Death_Hoe_Inn

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