Today, I was in bed, thinking about my crush and playing with myself, when I remembered the complicated spreadsheet my boss asked me to make tomorrow. That got me more excited than the thought of my crush. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
When work husbands go too far
Today, I accidentally called out the coworker I have a crush on’s name in bed instead of my wife’s. The thing is, thinking about her is the only thing that will keep me hard and brought to orgasm. FML
Turned on
Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML
Today, I realized the extent of my crush on one of my employees when I found myself cropping our picture out of the staff photo to see what we would look like as a couple. FML
Bored stiff
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I got so bored, I made a "to do" list for the week in my head. FML
Today, I finally got the guts to ask out my crush. She said yes and I was really happy. Then I woke up. FML
Lust for life
Today, thanks to a very intense sexual dream, I suddenly have a strong (and lustful) crush on a coworker, making me gasp every time I see them. I'm happily married. And pregnant. FML
Pervs all round!
Today, I was working by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated, I started to moan and say dirty things… Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML
The X Files
Today, I found an old USB drive in a drawer and spent the afternoon going through the files, expecting embarrassing photos from school. Instead, I found a spreadsheet I'd made at 16, listing every person I had a crush on, complete with rankings and notes. I'm now terrified someone will find my “Top 10” list. FML
Today, I told my coworker who I have been crushing on for a while, that I really enjoyed our time last night. I immediately realized that the time we spent last night was in my sex dream. FML
Time to shop
Today, I made my whole grocery list out in my head. While having sex with my fiancee. FML
Top comments
Altrown_fml 0
I laughed so ******* hard. MERGE MY CELLS, BABY! OH YEAH! WRAP THAT TEXT! GIVE ME A HEADING FORMAT!
cracktus 0
You can be aroused by things other than sexual thoughts. Pretty much anything that's present and strong in your mind can get you going.
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Comments (51)
cracktus 0
You can be aroused by things other than sexual thoughts. Pretty much anything that's present and strong in your mind can get you going.
redsox4021 0
damn French... @(-_-)@
noahvs67 0
one time I got excited from the thought of getting a nuke in mw2
polarpaul 0
Maybe you really just need an accountant to align your rows and columns?
killdozer1 2
Or maybe you should make a scatter plot.
zethioth 0
Well, good luck on the spreadsheet.
BellaMuerte_fml 0
This is a really lame FML.
UziTopete 0
for sure
Altrown_fml 0
I laughed so ******* hard. MERGE MY CELLS, BABY! OH YEAH! WRAP THAT TEXT! GIVE ME A HEADING FORMAT!
withsexyresults 0
INSERT COLUMN
bridgette5866 0
hahahahah BEST COMMENT EEEEVER.
TheBrenster 2
altrown is my new hero.
ccdd11 0
Haha i can picture that
bcih 0
You just made my day! Rofl
acrylicParadox 7
I nearly died of laughter. Thank you.
iFruit 0
Altrown that was AMAZING
chiaro 0
that's what she said lol
VirtuallyUnbreak 0
I love spreadsheets!
perdix 29
When you've got you legs spread on your sheets, I can see how spreadsheets can come to mind. Make sure you pay careful attention to that spot in Column G. And don't forget to use the Solver. It keeps trying, again and again, plugging in numbers, pulling them out, in and out, until it reaches your goal to your satisfaction. Are you sure you're not really hot for your boss?
meelmo 0
Win.
Improbability 0
LOL, are you my husband pretending to be from France? I swear he thinks up things he could do in Excel while we're going at it. Some guys just don't make a big deal out of sex. It doesn't mean they are gay, or unsexual or unloving. It's just not a big concern. Since you were already sexually excited, I'm sure the new excitement lent to that, even though it wasn't sexual. However, if you really do find cells, columns and macros sexually arousing, I'm sure they have a sexually deviant term we could look up...
GodsOfWrath 0
You deserved it.