Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML
Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
Today, I was pulled over for speeding and was shocked that the cop asked me out. Before I could respond, he noticed my wedding ring, said "Nevermind" and then gave me a ticket. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was, "A man running." I didn't even get an apology. FML
Today, my wife and I had another couple over. My wife was beside me while we all talked in the kitchen. I turned to put something in the fridge, and the other couple went into the next room. Turning back, I groped my wife's breasts playfully. She screamed and slapped me. It wasn't my wife. FML
Today, my fiancée woke up from a nightmare where I cheated on her. She has so far successfully gotten into my personal and work e-mails, and all my social media. I'm not sure if I'm worse at picking a wife or at picking passwords. FML
Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML
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Top comments
Sekkaichi 12
I'm guessing he wants you out of the picture.
dramaelf 37
Wow. No donuts for him.
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Comments (89)
Sekkaichi 12
I'm guessing he wants you out of the picture.
sarah6786 14
I wouldn't be surprised if they hooked up while he was in jail. Clever.
speshlk37 13
I would make a case for conflict of interest and sue the bejeezus out of him. Unless ofcourse you were truly guilty.
PulseShock 9
If you can prove this you can get these chargers dropped. Definitely a conflict on interest, get his badge number and make a series of complaints
Shepardspie71 8
Yes. Sue the police. Good idea. Make sure you never need any help from a cop. Ever
gun6slinger9 9
Maybe op got in some really deep trouble and she tried seducing the cop for some leniency? No? Ya get those charges dropped for conflict of interest.
SamanthaCassieL 10
74: there are a lot of small things police have to remember or they (and depending on severity the department) could be sued. And they aren't talking about suing here;they are saying that if there isn't enough proof of his crimes or it isn't severe, prove his wife was sleeping with the cop and the charges will be dropped because of conflict of interest.
dramaelf 37
Wow. No donuts for him.
RetardedPotato 6
There's OP's (hopefully ex-)wife's donut if you know what I mean.
Enslaved 36
Copper seems to enjoy glazed! :P
FMLbutYDI 17
Did he leave his cuffs in your bed?
CoffeeChickBlows 13
Simple solution: divorce her and stop breaking the ******* law.
rg350dx 29
Probably forgot them after he completed a strip search of OP's wife
SokDek 14
*don't you mean cavity search? ;)
abbttmc 12
That blows
iammeorami 25
op's wife can be to op: " now your just somebody that I used to blow"
MrGordon 9
Wow dude that really sucks. If I were you I'd divorce your wife and don't pay for the fines
M3DIC4T3 29
.....and then end up in jail, again. Either hire one of OJ Simpson's lawyers or pay the fines, along with divorce or marriage counseling.
jab7769 8
Have you watched fracture. The fact that he is sleeping with his wife is grounds for miss trials because of conflict of interest.
tygerarmy 35
You should find out the police code of conduct for your area, he could be fired for adultery.
roshae_16 11
Ha! Im sure oj's BEST lawyer is um... Well... DEAD!
sig4life 18
Yes he can be fired but for conflict of interest or abuse if power. I would find it hard to believe that the same scumbag dirty cop isn't abusing a little power. Also divorce the bitch and make sure she ends up with as little as possible. Oh and try not to bruise her it will come back and haunt you.
challan 19
Sucks for you, but good for her! From criminal to justice upholder... She's stepping up in the world.
MrConcise 34
Cheating is only morally criminal.
NerdyPanther09 6
I'm sure there's something he can do if the arrests were personal. If he was legitimately arrested, then, yeah, he's screwed.
griffy14 9
Actually, cheating in a marriage is a breach of contract. He can divorce her and not have to deal with alimony or anything of that nature an possibly sue her. And the officer can lose his job if it's proven that it was personal.
OhDearBetrayal 25
This is not what feminism is about.
LilFidget 4
He can lose his job for having an affair with her too if the dude makes a huge stink about it on the news.
Ranger538 3
Your a bitch aren't you
johnnie254 7
dude, shut up...
TheDrifter 23
Well, now we know how you made bail.
Welshite 39
This is hard to call. Yes, it was wrong of the officer to have an affair with your wife, but we don't know if you deserved those arrests or if it was simply malice on the officer's part.
JACKxRAWR 22
I agree. Could be that the officer is a dickbag, could be that OP is a psycho and his wife is trying to get away etc etc.
edmunson 22
And occasionally we see common sense come out buried in these comments. Well said 44!
fsomelife 26
If you can get evidence to present to the court, make that bastard's life hell.
CoffeeChickBlows 13
Simple solution really: divorce her, report him and stop breaking the ******* law.
fsomelife 26
Somehow I'm getting the feeling that he never broke the law
RetardedPotato 6
How does breaking the law give that cop an excuse to bang some guy's wife?
gc327072 30
******* laws? Do those prevent cheating?
BobbieH 19
It doesn't give him the right to sleep with his wife but it does give him the right to arrest him.
Soninuva 41
More like have the wife stop ******* the law!