Dirty mind
Today, my boyfriend got angry and threatened to dump me, all because I wouldn't give in to his demands not to go to a birthday sleepover with my friends. He seriously thinks it's going to turn into some kind of lesbian orgy and that I'll cheat on him. Thanks, PornHub. FML
Top comments
malkavian_mad 13
I would dump him.
jgriff79 23
He seen it on the Internet. It MUST be true!
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Comments (201)
malkavian_mad 13
I would dump him.
mkcontrollers 11
Glad first comment wasn't a sorry this time..
Bakarra 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Or that time when two girls found a cup... D:
mkcontrollers 11
Why would you even post that. The nightmares are already coming back thanks #37
kyarush 10
It happens though, imagine the insecurity that would follow from something like that happening..
folgy 10
I have to agree with 1 on this. Hopefully he has been wrapping the willy when you guys do the sexy time don't need anymore dumbasses in the works today. You go enjoy yourself sister.
OriginalimoaN 15
It DOES happen 44! Then those stupid skanks ruin perfectly good guys, and those guys end up not trusting their future gf's to go to girl sleepovers. True story there.
spekledworf 18
44 and 71 are both just OP's boyfriend. He made these account to justify his beliefs
garrett1999o3 16
I showed 2 girls 1 cup to my friends once.I never watched it.Only them!>:D (you might think it's cruel but when i was sleeping they put my hand in you-know-where...)
witeshdw08 4
Try 1 guy 1 jar
OriginalimoaN 15
Wth 112?? Clearly, with 77 posts I didn't JUST create this account for any reason. And straight girls can be super skanks and mess around with girls just cuz that's what skanks do.
fidoyal 12
@15 i see what you did there
Zeurakules 5
Install a internet filter!
enormouselephant 15
*an
lilhellian 26
You don't realize how easy those are to get past..
tararochelle 18
Was correcting the comment really necessary?? It's not that big of a deal. The whole grammar nazi thing is getting kind of annoying!
beachchick9498 5
She's his girlfriend, not his mom! Let the poor boy watch his **** in peace haha
JenkJenks 6
#55 - You shouldn't put two question marks after a sentence. It's grammatically incorrect.
tmmundy 17
61...I think you missed the whole point of the FML, maybe you should trying reading it again.
dashizam 10
Maybe he's replying to a comment, you know, just an idea.
lilhellian 26
For one example. I had linux on a flash drive and booted into at school because I wanted to play around with it.. I discovered a tool or two that help me bypass the decent filter my school has..
Catkam623 27
Ever tried hotspot shield from anchor free, great program.
acerima 11
If have to dump him. It's apparent he doesn't trust you anyway.
acerima 11
Stupid auto correct, meant to say I would dump him.
Soloman212 28
"If have to" -> "I would" ... Non sequitur.
jizzwold 21
"If" -> "I'd" ... Sequitur
Shrike 23
^ Oh for ****'s sake, HereticalHomo. Do you have to try to turn EVERYTHING into an issue of homophobia? Can't you comment on anything else? People like you are the worst possible advertisement for the LGBT community, I swear. Now, the problem with her experimenting is that she's in an obviously monogamous relationship. That said, the guy's an abusive fuckhead and should be dumped ASAP.
Uhscanherdarklee 10
Beat him to the punch and dump him...be sure to do it before midnight so his steak and bj day is forever marred.
YoTengoTomatoes 7
150, I think you're missing the sarcasm. They do that will all their comments. They mention homophobia (or anything lgbt related) but they're not seriously saying that homophobia is the real issue
Sinkhole 26
153 - Taking into account HereticalHomo's name and profile, I think it's safe to say that they're being serious and not sarcastic at all.
Shrike 23
Woah there, HereticalHomo. No need for insults, you dramatic fuckball. Haha, just kidding! You really will find any excuse to play the poor, oppressed, objectified... whatever you are. I can't even remember the ludicrously hipster-ish labels you wrote on your profile. Anyone in their right mind would automatically assume you're a troll, based on that ridiculous mess of stereotypes. Seriously, none are so pathetic as the people who define themselves based on race, sexuality, etc. No, the guy's hostility isn't to lesbianism, it's to the moronic belief that she'll CHEAT ON HIM. Am I getting through to you here? Or are you going to start ranting again, implying that I'm somehow a homophobe? Newsflash, I'm part of that LGBT community I mentioned. I guess that makes you a homophobe now, since you're disagreeing with me. At least according to your own logic. Well done!
vadaaa 11
157- I'm thinking more that the boyfriend would dump her for CHEATING.
Uhscanherdarklee 10
I could be wrong but it doesn't really mention the bfs attitude towards lesbians specifically, just his insecurities about OP cheating on him.
anyoldnamewilldo 23
From the way the FML was worded, I think cheating and trust were the issues, not lesbianism.
priceyfml 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
In my book, it's not cheating if it's with a girl
jem970 19
Really #4? If your partner has sexual relations with someone OTHER Than you thats cheating! Unless its a girl. Yes that sounds reasonable.
priceyfml 7
Well I'll just stop, sorry fellas bad joke.
TheDrifter 23
Yeah, the "eating ain't cheating" logic never works, especially on your own significant other.
ShoyuSauceSoup 26
For me, it doesn't matter if it is with a boy or a girl: it always counts as cheating.
InfamousLastWord 9
Calm down everyone. Some guys feel that a girl with another girl isn't cheating, some guys feel that it is cheating. It's a matter of opinion, that's all. Just because someone's opinion differs from your opinion of a scenario, doesn't mean their viewpoint is wrong. It just means they feel differently about it than you feel.
kurodansei 16
Eatings Not Cheating lol I like that. I'm gonna use that one. Also thank you previous commenter for your perfectly level headed defense. If my girlfriend slept with another girl. I'd be cool withit.
23Z9TZO 18
Most people don't understand awesome circumstances when they see one, having a girl into that kinda stuff would be pretty damn awesome
Meshidaru_fml 7
#141 are you stupid? Taking sexual pleasure with another person IS cheating, no matter what (even if it's oral).
SunAndMoon427 12
174...to you it is, but not to everyone. I know my boyfriend said if I hooked up with a girl he wouldn't see that as cheating, where as I do because I do share your view that anyone, guy or girl, is cheating, but some guys don't see it like that. That isn't wrong at all, that's how they handle their relationships and ya know what, as people, we all have a right to chose what works for us in relationships
anyoldnamewilldo 23
Too funny! I wonder how common the reverse of that logic holds true. How many girls would be cool if their bf messed around with a guy and say they didn't consider it cheating? Another double standard?
sirpantselot 22
4, I knew a girl who had that philosophy - it wasn't cheating if it was with a guy. She ended that rule after five (FIVE!) of her bfs turned out to be gay.
Pootato 7
Just because a woman likes sleeping with women, that doesn't mean she's not monogamous. I wouldn't sleep with a girl, even if my partner were okay with it. And even if I did want to, there's no reason to think that the other girl would be okay with my partner watching or joining in, so there's no reason to think there'd be any benefit for him at all.
jgriff79 23
He seen it on the Internet. It MUST be true!
TrueTriage 16
Same with Cartoons! Scooby exists!!
isallwaysme 27
Saw* not seen, sorry its a pet peeve of mine when people say "seen" instead of "saw."
420Zombie 17
I was under the impression that he wrote ‘seen’ on purpose
flockz 19
Bonjour.
kitkatkit 4
Ooh.... 116 are you a French model?!?!
InfamousLastWord 9
#84 I don't know why you got "thumbed down" for your comment. It's a pet peeve of mine also. It does say in the FML rules to watch your grammatical errors in your post. Obviously small ones happen, especially on a mobile app, but I agree in correcting one that is so blatantly obvious.
Catkam623 27
Here just for fun lets make seen work he's which is what I'm sure he meant to write there is really no point to correcting someone for their bad typing or misuse of grammar.
jem970 19
Can you blame him? Thats a legitimate concern! In his dreams except he's there participating. Sit down and have a serious conversation about his trust isses.
SuperKnuckels 6
hes got you, why blame **** for it. unless your relationship isnt doing well.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
Because **** was more than likely where he got the idea from... **** LOGIC!
jigglypuff34 16
Everyone knows those **** scenarios are fake. Now when a sexy teacher wearing a short skirt asks you to stay after school on the other hand...
tararochelle 18
Jigglypuff, I don't know if you have read the news lately, but the amount of teachers hooking up with students is crazy!! So, that situation is pretty believable!!
OriginalimoaN 15
Idk of you've read that comment lately, but that was kinda the implication there.
perdix 29
#9, harumph! I had a sexy teacher in a short skirt seductively ask me to stay after school to "bang her erasers." It turned out she literally wanted me to bang her erasers! Chalk dust, dammit, chalk dust!!!
Alexweber929 14
68 insinuation
amykins11 6
I'm really unsure why he's upset if he thinks that's what's going to happen...surprised he isn't demanding video...are your friends unattractive
fischerxx 10
It would still be cheating. He's still a dumbass though
gc327072 30
Well yea! Everyone knows **** is 100% realistic! Duh!
alexafml 5
Nuh-uh!! I know because the girl never eats the pizza she gets delivered and paid for with sex!! ;)
420Zombie 17
that's because if she ate the pizza every time, she wouldn't be able to pay for it with her body anymore. as she would be fat as shit. ain't no pizza guys got any time for dat!