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Today, after finally sleeping with a girl for the first time in I don't know how long, at some point during sex she managed to completely crush my balls. I acted cool until she left, then I had to wake my parents up at 3 a.m. to take me to the hospital where I was diagnosed testicular bruising. FML

#17047649
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39194) - you deserved it (7196)

On 07/10/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

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My favourite part is how she just left when you guys were done.

You didn't have to pay for that sex, right? I can't imagine what runs through a hooker's mind when you tell her, "Don't wake my parents..."

#4 - On 07/10/2011 at 6:23am by allmidnighteyes

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How the hell did she manage that?

#3 - On 07/10/2011 at 6:23am by xxmollyxx

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