Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was walking on the street when a woman in front of me dropped a couple of dollars. I picked them up and chased her to return it all. She insisted that it wasn't hers. I tried to tell her it was, but she wouldn't accept it. A cop saw me and arrested me for solicitation. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML
Today, I was working at my job as cashier. This really attractive girl who often comes in walked in, so I mustered up the courage to ask her out by writing my number on a dollar bill. She paid and the amount her change happened to be a dollar. I go to hand her the money when she sees it and says, "Keep the change!" FML
Today, a woman came up to my cash register, where I was struggling with the cash, and asked if we took cash. FML
Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML
Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML
Today, I needed to borrow money from my girlfriend. I went into her bag and pulled out the money all while a lady watched me open-mouthed. Turns out it wasn't my girlfriend's bag. It belonged to the lady watching me. FML
Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML
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Top comments
CammyGal 26
And this problem couldn't be fixed with a simple explanation?
cmayer 20
I don't know how people can be so presumptuous.
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Comments (110)
CammyGal 26
And this problem couldn't be fixed with a simple explanation?
Damian95 16
Sometimes people don't realize they can simply talk things out.
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
She just escalated things way too quickly...
HKCgrimmjow 15
You guys are missing the point here, OP got the money! May have lost some dignity but I mean... Dignity comes at a price eh? Eh? Okay :( bye
Poppipuff 14
1- Maybe the lady was so pissed op couldn't even say any word, and when he finally explained himself, enough time had passed for him to think: "FML, what a shitty day". I mean if OP could have done anything I don't see why he wouldn't have. Let's not assume and just agree on the lady's bad reaction and say 'people these days'.
SwaggCapone 11
That woman sounds extremely conceited
Rommel1942 9
'Murica
deathy94 14
#79 are we naming random countries and replacing the first letter with ' and the first vowel with u? If so, here I go. 'Unada
jipster 11
Just walk away OP. Just walk away.
Reaper1984 13
'Urway
Ryuukazuki 7
I think the real question is, did she take the "offer"? OP never stated she was angry or anything. Maybe she was flattered and tried to take it. Now OP is left with a creepy stalker who keeps trying to sleep with him. Such a twist!
pinkalicious224 7
Someone needs to get over herself…
LanaViolin 10
People these days...
golden_warrior 23
People these days have big butts?
Grex_fml 9
See it as a food thing....free money!!
deathy94 14
... I like big butts and I can not lie...
CommonSenseKarma 17
Vain people these days.
therealafroninga 10
I bet she skipped a mile afterwards too.
cmayer 20
I don't know how people can be so presumptuous.
Blue_Black_fml 21
Most people actually jump to conclusions way too fast..
SystemofaBlink41 27
Yeah, I would even understand her assuming him stealing, but trying to sleep with her?
ZeroPath5 16
@52 while reading the FML I thought it would go down to that...boy was I wrong
Poppipuff 14
How did you think about stealing ?
imtooshy 18
Did she eventually take her money that she dropped or you were paid for her insult?
BobbieH 19
I'd say she's really got a problem if the first thought of someone holding cash is trying to solicit sex from her. That's just not normal. FYL OP, you were just treated like a creeper!
golden_warrior 23
Why do I have a feeling that this actually happened to her before. She may need a wardrobe change or should go easy on the makeup.
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
OR she should wear whatever clothes and makeup she chooses to, but take an additional 5 seconds to assess social interactions she has with people in order to grasp what's happening.
bamagrl410 31
She obviously has low self esteem. If she views herself poorly, she'll then assume that other people do as well and lash out at them for it in her anger/ insecurity. I'm pretty sure there's a psychological term for it, but I can't remember what it is unfortunately...
ise3 10
Anyone else thinking potential porno intro?
cristy91 33
Actually, I thought of Pootie Tang "You think that just cuz a girl likes to dress fancy and stand on the corner next to some ******, that she's hookin?"
ervington 8
What is wrong with paying for sex? Nothing.
jjessen 20
Everything is wrong about it. The fact that you are willing to spend money on sex as opposed to spending the time to form a relationship with someone is extremely wrong.
KeXu 6
Sometimes you just gotta f*ck. As long as you're not in a relationship, and it's mutually-compliant sex, everything's good.
TheDrifter 23
Do you buy your significant other gifts? Pay their bills if you make more than them? Then you're paying for sex, this way just eliminates the relationship as a negotiating method.
SmilieAKD 20
It's illegal for starters and usually leads to the spread of diseases, corruption & crime.
1lowscort 8
The fact that it is illegal is what causes disease, corruption and crime.
ervington 8
47, thank you. It was a joke, but thanks for standing up for me.
A7XCamaro 19
69- it's not illegal everywhere, there are even places in the US where it's legal.
Revan501 15
OP did you not try to explain that she dropped the money?
LlamaUprising 10
Have to wonder exactly how you were trying to get her attention
lilhellian 26
"Hey, get on your knees!" That seems to work wonders for me.
Reaper1984 13
"hey looking for a date", (as you wave the money)
golden_warrior 23
After that, I would have just said NVM and kept the cash.
tigerisabelle 31
What an arrogant woman, as if you'd sleep with her... people are so insolent sometimes.