Dogs and Animals: You're not the boss of me - FML

You're not the boss of me

By crazydog - 10/06/2011 20:39 - United Kingdom

Today, my dog surprised everyone by somehow managing to climb on the roof. I followed him up and spent the next hour trying to catch him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 657

You deserved it 4 181

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Same thing different taste

Brave

By screw the cat - 24/07/2012 05:10 - United States - South Jordan

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 115

You deserved it 23 893

Get back here!

By catgirl911 - 13/10/2009 01:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 187

You deserved it 25 150

By dBLIZZARD - 09/06/2015 18:39 - United States

Today, my dog ran away. I looked for him for 5 hours, and when I came back home, he was waiting for me at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 026

You deserved it 4 029

By muffins69 - 18/09/2010 02:34 - United States

Today, I untied the rope that was tied to my dog's collar because it was wrapped around the tree choking him. He immediately ran off down the street. I had to chase him barefoot in my boxers for 20 minutes till he got tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 513

You deserved it 9 542

By Anonymous - 23/04/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 097

You deserved it 4 160

Cujo

By Doglover - 13/10/2011 15:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to climb up and sit in a tree for half an hour to avoid being mauled by a huge, insane dog. Its weird-looking owner eventually turned up, sneered at me, and walked off with the visibly smug dog in tow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 013

You deserved it 2 891

By Coldandshoeless - 08/01/2013 10:40 - United States - Hackettstown

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 290

You deserved it 6 432

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 31/01/2017 10:13 - United States - Gladewater

Today, after weeks of looking for the source of an awful smell in our house, I found out our dog has been climbing over our loft banister, into the attic, and shitting. There were over twenty mounds. It took me almost four hours to clean up, and it still stinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 548

You deserved it 762

Treasure hunt

By Catois - 05/03/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 772

You deserved it 13 220

By birdhater - 15/10/2009 06:16 - Australia

Today, the bird that has been stuck in my roof for two days, keeping me awake at night, finally flew out of the roof and into the house. As I was opening the door to send it outside, it flew straight back up into the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 858

You deserved it 2 664

Next

Top comments

Miss_Michaela 10

Saturday 11 June 2011 0:50

Well, thats doggone crazy!

kaka123abc 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 0:56

he's spider dog!!! SPIDER DOG SPIDER DOG DOES WHATEVER A SPIDER DOG DOES

Comments

sheethapins 13

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:14

Canine Knievel

LairaIsKindaCool 6

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:15

Dog treats - they work wonders.

grantyboi 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:21

Like a boss.

fmlfmlihatemysel 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:22

thats one badass and funny dog. did anyone youtube this shit

sweet_candy_ 17

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:24

Puppy Power!!

Takador 3

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:27

Must be a HUGE roof...

pandalover69 26

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:29

someone that use to live across the street from me had a dog that would get on the roof, but they didn't really do anything about it hell one of their dogs got hit by a car and they didn't even take him to the vet

jennifer93 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:30

I want to meet this legendary dog

roger507 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:31

who cares???

8sq 13

Saturday 11 June 2011 1:40

Sounds like a real bitch...

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Here's the latest video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com, enjoy! Kay Akana, co-founder of 10secondtraumas.com, is also a stand-up comedian in LA. Do go and check out her performances, she did manage to make us lot laugh! ...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 12

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation, to find my fiance had cleaned the house top to bottom, and finished three projects he was constantly putting off. I was over the moon, until he said, "Yeah, when you're not nagging me all day, I can actually get shit done. Crazy, huh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 661

The Top

Today, I dislocated my shoulder doing a really big stretch when I woke up. After the doctor relocated it, my dad told me I still had to do my chores. No excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 121

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 420

You deserved it 6 105

Today, after an emergency doctor told me to go to the pharmacy to get Zantac for possible stomach ulcers, I was told by the pharmacist that it was actually recalled a year ago. I had to pay almost double the price for another antacid. Thanks a lot for knowing your stuff, ER doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 351

You deserved it 175

Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 916

You deserved it 6 757

Today, I had a major falling out with my best friend. Angry, I sent a short text message to him explaining how I felt. I soon noticed I'd accidentally texted "I'm going to fucking kill you, asshole." to my boss instead. I'm still waiting on a reply. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 593

You deserved it 40 397

Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 342

You deserved it 4 226