Which side are you on?

By thefuckman - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 941
You deserved it 1 689
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Top comments

Tuesdaythe10th 11

Your username is very creative

143 9

Comments

dcg1375 7

I would pick the side of the neighbor that did NOT bleach your lawn.

62 1
mduffy08 8

Someone call in the artillery...

4 1
GypsyRover 0

Ignore the dumb ass nabbers. If it gets worse,call the police. If that don't work,get mid-evil on there ass!!!

7 18
botanistjessica 24

Gypsy, I seriously hope nabbers was meant to be something other than neighbors.

10 0
gc327072 30

79- mid-evil? Why not left-evil of right-evil? Or did you mean medieval?

13 1
SenselessPattern 12

#20 Yeah, but the neighbor with the bleach is a cold-hearted killer, attacking the innocent grass as a show of strength. He is destined for complete domination of the neighborhood.

10 1
Tragichero92 12

I've been to the darkside. They lied about the cookies : <

14 1
Tuesdaythe10th 11

Your username is very creative

143 9
boxbrandon11 20

Thumbs up if you went up to look at the username

2 1
stephan18 23

That's hilarious, I'd have so much fun in that situation >:) pick a side!

10 15
CookieGirl4ever 13

Or for kids in elementary school… although I know from experience it's not fun being in the middle of that and having to "pick a side."

1 0
walmartpaysme 15

I would be scared to pick a side. Whichever one you don't pick is going to make your life a living hell.

112 4
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

Seriously. It's like OP is the new guy in prison. All he wants to do is his time then get out, but now he must choose a gang or else both gangs will bring on a wrath against him.

43 2
dead247 13

1. pick side 2. be spy for other side. 3. but really be spy for previous side. 4. watch as they plan and fail. It will hopefully work...in theory.

33 1
syley 5

Make 2 notes saying you're on Switzerland's side, if one asks you what you mean and the other doesn't you know which side is smarter

26 3
jessalinemai1398 6

Choose wisely.

61 1
Mister_Triangle 21

Put a note on both of their doors that says "I choose your side". Enjoy the part of double agent while you manipulate them against each other for your own ends.

16 0
Kamon97 23

Ya man left twix or right twix pick a side bro

0 0
MonsterCommenter 4

This is a lose-lose situation OP. I suggest moving out or inviting them over to work out there differences. Its probably just something like, "He forgot to give me back my drill!!"

55 5
Mister_Triangle 21

Just don't let them fill up on soda, or their friendship will be reignited at the expense of your Easter Island Head house exploding due to their giggling-induced carbonated belches. I've seen it happen before.

42 1
mckibben 7

Probally the best spongebob reference i have ever seen.

21 0
wannabesinger 16

I definitely think you should pick the dark side. They have cookies.

103 12
TBelle4Ever 15

But they will refuse to share their cookies

18 1
BunchieRules 31

50 - A member of the dark side, you are. Kill you, I must. - Yoda

17 1
djinnsnme 19

Hahaha we don't have cookies. This is the dark side. Are you really surprised we lied?

21 1
StubbornDonkey 10

The cake is a lie!

3 2
xCrazyMexican 4

So, which side do you pick op?

4 8
Hiimhaileypotter 52

I'd tell them you're not participating in their elementary feud :P

43 2
walmartpaysme 15

#9 I always think your picture is a llama when I'm just scrolling through the comments. I know it's a chicken, but the angle or something is so strange. Lol

16 1
jem970 19

OP, don't pick a side and you can unite them when they both want to get back at you! Of course you will be hit by hell on both fronts... Nah. Just save yourself the trouble and move or be Switzerland.

3 2
Hiimhaileypotter 52

#56- Aww, that's funny. Someone a few days ago said she looks like Buckbeak from Harry Potter! I admit, she's not a common-looking bird, but hippogriffs and llamas? Wonder what her babies would look like! XD

3 0
DragonzCreator 3

Make sure you pick the side that cooks good! You don't want to fight on a empty stomach.

31 4