Cops and Miscellaneous: Whatcha do when they come for you?

Whatcha do when they come for you?

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 20:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 890

You deserved it 4 382

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Thanks, I hate it

By ken - 19/07/2011 07:40 - Canada

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is cheating on me when she was arrested for having sex in public. Not with me though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 428

You deserved it 3 603

By Grandson - 01/01/2012 13:51 - Australia

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 871

You deserved it 2 741

By jailbirdlove - 11/10/2010 01:38 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 779

You deserved it 4 286

By single again - 06/09/2013 00:29 - United States - Chico

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 111

You deserved it 5 294

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 15:01 - United States

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 590

You deserved it 4 841

Jailbird

By Donnie - 18/07/2019 06:00

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 518

You deserved it 224

By DemCherries - 28/03/2017 15:00 - United States - Overland Park

Today, at my job as a police officer, I had to arrest my own girlfriend for having sex at Walmart. She tried to get me to let her out on the grounds of being "pretty" and dating me. She wants to continue the relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 248

You deserved it 565

Smooth criminal

By nickim756 - 13/09/2010 02:29 - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 520

You deserved it 6 235

Bad boys bad boys

By addie - 03/03/2013 08:27 - United States

Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 235

You deserved it 3 068

Caught

By fuck - 09/11/2013 23:30 - United States - Hubert

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 405

You deserved it 5 276

rawrkittehpwnage 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 1:36

sounds like you got yourself a keeper there.

AlexBuda 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 2:33

You have a **** as a girlfriend, time to break up

Comments

saleha97 4

Sunday 23 January 2011 13:28

now you have an excuse to dump her (:

RedJag 0

Monday 24 January 2011 1:53

What a catch !!!

dt520 4

Monday 24 January 2011 2:15

ask snookie how shes been for me once you get her out

wtfsnickers 1

Monday 24 January 2011 11:54

guess she didn't give it up to the cop or maybe she did

ManaUser 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 3:19

Without you? That sucks.

hateevryone 14

Monday 11 July 2011 20:33

hmmm and i wonder why she exposed herself?

afulks78 11

Wednesday 14 September 2011 4:49

**** !

shuttershades99 0

Thursday 16 February 2012 4:48

Purposly or like wtf? But anyway, whadda keeper. Not...

newburton13 26

Saturday 24 March 2012 19:44

I hope you left her there.

animal50199 10

Tuesday 17 July 2012 19:29

Nice taste in girls. LOL

Keywords

Dreams Jealousy Love Geek Gamers Video games AITA Kids Parents Family Gun control Animals Relatable Money Amazon Annoying Birthday Cute Weird Awkward Health Abuse Scams Social Media Mysterious Friends Miscellaneous School Education Anger issues

The Top

Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response was, "When you coming over so I can test this stuff out?" His wife and daughter thought it was hilarious. I could've died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 847

You deserved it 635

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 755

You deserved it 3 574

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a nasty fight. After a few hours, she wanted to give me a blowjob, so I thought we weren't mad at each other anymore. Turns out she was still mad because she bit my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 085

You deserved it 462

Today, the love of my life said, "You’d make a great husband! Whoever marries you in the future is gonna be so happy!" We’ve been together for 4 years and was planning to propose on her birthday in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 002

You deserved it 104

Today, I went to see the doctor for my daughter and myself. I fell two weeks ago, I thought I'd sprained my ankle but apparently I broke my leg instead. I’ve been limping around for two weeks. My daughter was sick, which is the only reason I got X-rayed. It may need screws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 186

Today, I worked with a sweet old lady. She refused to cook most of the food on the menu, and the food she did cook was super oily. When she received complaints about it, she blamed me for not draining the oil. When the customer defended me, she then told the customer it was her job to drain the oil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 81

Today, my boss threatened to fire me because I'm unproductive, and haven't been doing anything. He doesn't tell me what to do, and expects me to read his mind. When I ask him what he wants me to do, he gets pissed and says that I should already know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 450

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 128