The prize is that if you engage is foreplay with your wife, she's more likely to want to have sex with you. So I guess if you never want to sleep with your wife again, turning down her sexual advances is a good idea.

It doesn't have to be all-or-nothing. Generally speaking, rejecting your wife's sexual advances has adverse effects. But if she wants to play a long game to draw out the experience, you can turn that down and suggest a more time-efficient foreplay.

No it doesn't. That's part of the problem.

So a wife wanting some foreplay and seduction is "pretending" now? What's with all these dudes getting mad the woman isn't being "direct" enough? Sex isn't supposed to be a quick plumbing job you can check off your to-do list. There's a reason sex scenes in movies aren't just one person walking up to the other out of nowhere and saying "I would like to have sex now if you are available" followed by the most efficient means of accomplishing the act.

If that’s not explicit enough, you’re a lost cause!

Most women do not think of sex in terms of "what's the quickest method to get his dick in my ******." We're not playing some elaborate game of "oh, I want to just ask for sex but I'm going to be sneaky about it." OP was looking for flirty, sexy seduction and invited her man to particpate. She shouldn't have to hold up a sign saying "if you would engage with me in a titilating situation I will more likely grant you access to my genitalia." We're not playing games, we just don't cold start.