Intimacy: We need a break

We need a break

By pst - 21/11/2010 01:06 - South Africa

Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 682

You deserved it 59 227

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

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Same thing different taste

I'm innocent!

By Anonymous - 06/06/2022 04:00

Today, I got a text from an old hook up. I assumed it was a mistake, since we hadn’t spoken in years. She replied that her fiancé just dumped her after finding our old chat log. The last message was 10 years ago, and apparently she has become a prude since then, so now I’m a homewrecker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 455

You deserved it 133

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 14:31 - United States - Iowa Park

Today, I got mugged by a fake hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 728

You deserved it 8 301

By Bigfatfailure - 28/03/2013 10:02 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, I got dumped during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 497

You deserved it 9 847

By Anonymous - 22/08/2011 19:35 - United States

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 615

You deserved it 46 749

It's for the best

By yesguysgetabusedtoo - 24/05/2013 23:42 - New Zealand - Papamoa

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 612

You deserved it 6 946

Complicated relationship

By Anonymous - 02/11/2019 23:00

Today my girlfriend of three years broke up with me. Why? She wasn’t sure about the relationship anymore. She seemed pretty sure though, seeing she was on Tinder less than 2 hours after, thanks to the 3 different friends that all called me about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 027

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 11:37 - United States

Today, I texted a girl who I had hooked up with the night before to see if she wanted to hang out again. She responded, "I think we should keep it the way it was, before last night." I just met her last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 799

You deserved it 13 778

By prostitutes boyfriend - 21/10/2011 14:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 378

You deserved it 4 390

By brokenatthebar - 24/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Carleton

Today, I was dumped via text halfway through my 8-hour bar shift. I had to deal with my co-workers and customers asking me how my vacation with my now-ex was for the next 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 767

You deserved it 315

Sex work is real work

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 00:01

Today, I just found out my best friend is a hooker. I just thought she worked nights and had terrible taste in clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 845

You deserved it 486

SleepingSkulls 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 9:21

This is probably the saddest thing I've ever read.

imsosleepy 9

Sunday 21 November 2010 10:44

A hooker? Did you honesty expect a Disney-styled happily ever ending?

Comments

chelseaaababyyy 17

Monday 18 July 2011 9:49

ew..

SmotNyleve 4

Saturday 6 August 2011 12:18

Lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xD

lostlosers 4

Tuesday 4 October 2011 16:44

oh wow that totally sucks

drodz241 0

Wednesday 12 October 2011 6:24

What does comment moderated mean anyway

Evan2297 0

Wednesday 12 October 2011 16:58

She's a hooker. What did you expect?

lilpowers 3

Friday 27 January 2012 7:06

You know you need to GET A LIFE when…

stepherz89 17

Saturday 6 April 2013 9:36

You seem so desperate

tewa21 12

Sunday 21 April 2013 21:25

Thats a new low.

Ashamed_Sister 60

Sunday 20 October 2013 10:42

He got friendzoned by a hooker.

james71993 21

Thursday 5 June 2014 19:39

That's shitty. Stop ******* hookers

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Cops Neighbours Stressed out Scary Health Parents Transportation Cars Embarrassing Work First Dates LGBTQIA+ Love My ex Facebook Social Media Sex Intimacy Virginity School Painful Dating Tinder Awkward AITA Coworkers Jealousy Skincare

The Top

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 859

You deserved it 6 043

Today, I had whiplash after my dad and I were rear ended by a suburban. Despite the state trooper saying I should go, my dad delayed taking me to the ER because he wanted to pick up the dog from "doggy daycare" and take her for a nice long walk, while I waited for my mom to come home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 047

You deserved it 1 523

The Top

Today, I learned the hard way that when sick, throw up, then have diarrhea. Not the other way round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 164

Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 169

You deserved it 40 891

Today, I decided to start exercising. I almost passed out five minutes into the warm up, and couldn't even stand in the shower afterwards. I'm only 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 924

You deserved it 35 568

Today, I canceled my dental check-up because I'm getting busy at work. Then, as I was flossing, my finger slipped, I heard a "crunch" from one of my fillings, and I now have a killer toothache. It's costing me double to go to the dentist because it's now an emergency call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 068

You deserved it 7 484

Today, I had a job interview. I was almost late due to road closure and being blocked in my street by the trash truck. The "interview" turned out to be a hiring fair, with lots of other people. I had to wait outside for 3 hours in the sun with no shade, water or food. I didn't get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 519

You deserved it 367

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 058

You deserved it 4 849